Close to Me
by NayaNewss
Summary: Santana is a 3rd year in university and Brittany is in her first year. It's frosh week in other words prank the freshmen week. What happens when Santana pranks Brittany realizing they went to high school together and has fallen for Brittany.
1. Meeting You

Close to Me

CHAPTER 1

**Santana's Point of View**

Another year of university starts up again this year. This will be my third year of university so I will be a Junior majoring in business minoring in music. My dreams to become something in music, whether it's a recording artist, music manager, anything that involved music I'd be happy to do.

I have my friends, my closet one's Puck, he get into some trouble but not big enough trouble to get kicked out of university, just some pranks here and there. I'll admit I'm a bit of a bitch, but whatever, I don't really care, it's part of who I am. I live in a apartment not to far from university, on the coast, that's right my university is close to the coast. It's nice, I get to go surfing whenever I want and I get to look at the beach from my apartment. It's a great life.

I met my roommate first year, she was my roommate in my door room, we clicked right away and that's off because usually I bitch at everyone. Her name is Quinn. She's on the cheerleading team, she sometimes gets into the trouble Puck, me and a couple of our other friends get into but she's usually the good one in our group.

I was on the beach at this moment, tanning, you know why, because I look hot. I always look hot. Since the beach by my home isn't a privet beach people walk, jog or swim past. There are a bunch of houses here where the backyard is the beach, I see them, mostly guys always come back jogging checking me out. I don't mind it, someone I guess it gets tiring but that's very rarely.

As I lay tanning on my beach chair I hear footsteps coming towards me. I try to ignore them, maybe if they think I'm really busy or sleeping they'll leave me alone. I wants to get my tan on.

Just as I realize whoever is coming is not going away I'm about to take off my sunglasses and look up when I feel water, cold water fall all over my body. I jump up whipping my sunglasses off in shock. I look up to see Puck smiling at me holding a glass, an empty glass.

"Puck! What the fuck!" I snapped.

"Sorry San, you looked a little hot. I thought I'd help cool you off," Puck smirked.

"You're a dick," I said giving Puck at shove over, he looked at me with that look a smile at him as I kicked some sad onto him which landed on his legs and stomach.

"Oh now you're gonna get it!" He said.

"Oh I'm so scared," and I started running off down to the beach towards the water.

He chases after me I ran faster only because I know he likes to run to go after what he wants. I see him getting closer behind be until I feel arm's rap around my stomach and lift me up. I scream but not in a help I'm being attacked, in a playful way. Pucks like my brother, and to clear things up we aren't dating, I don't like him like that, he's not my type. No guys are my type.

I laugh as he swings me all around until I realize where he's taking me too, he's taking me to the water. He has picked me up and now he is going to throw me in the water. I'm already wet but I don't want him to throw me in the water, I have to get ready for this afternoon, I'm going to the first ever party of the year.

"Puck! Stop! Let me go!"

"To late, I told you I'd get you back," Puck said now standing in the water holding me about to let me go.

"No please!" I said slapping him on the arm.

"Well now I've got to do this," suddenly I felt myself falling and the next thing I knew water surrounded me. I burst up for air as I grabbed Puck and pulled him down with me.

"Santana!" He yelled as he toppled over and fell into the water, I laughed. He and I splashed each other a little bit until we were both soaking wet. I saw Quinn running out over to the beach with a smile on her face, she wasn't only smiling but when she saw us she started to shake her head.

"Come on guys, cut it out! We're gonna be late," Quinn told us.

"Loosen up a little Quinny," I told her, she always was studying or something.

"You guys are so immature."

"That's why you love us," Puck smirked.

She scoffed..." Whatever."

I grabbed Puck and dragged him out of the water throwing a towel over me to dry off. He smirked, I knew he liked my body, it was obvious by the way he looked at me but he never would have a chance besides I could tell that besides me, he liked Quinn, he just couldn't admit it to himself yet.

"So guys, I needed to talk to you both," Puck said drying off.

"What about?" Quinn asked.

"It's frosh week, you know what that mean's all the first years will be arriving soon, thinking there so cool because they're in university now, partying, having fun but I happen to know about the juniors and seniors planning some frosh pranks to put them in their place."

"Prank week? I forgot about that." I told him.

"I don't know guys, we didn't like it in our frosh week. It's supposed to be fun."

"It will be fun," Puck told her.

"Yeah for you guys, not for the first years." Quinn said. Typical of Quinn, always trying to do the sensible thing, the mature thing. We had to get her drunk tonight, so we could help her cut loose. It's a good think Puck and I were her friends otherwise who knows how boring she would be.

"Come on Quinn, we both know you want to," I say.

"Pull some pranks on some first years? No thanks, I'll pass."

"Fine be a study girl," Puck said trying to make joke to her even if it was the worst joke ever, Quinn just rolled her eyes and smirked. I could tell she liked Puck too, but both still didn't want to tell each other. Of course I needed to help again, Santana, the couple set up girl! Ready to take action.

"I'm in," I tell Puck.

"Great!"

"What's our plan?" I ask.

"Well I was walking through the town the other day when I noticed a sign in the window of a shot! It was perfect! So perfect!" He said getting really excited.

"The sign was perfect?" Now I was confused.

"No! What it said on the sign!" Puck told me.

"What it say?" Quinn started to get interested, I knew she would want to help us, well I hoped that's where this was leading too. I liked partying with her, she was fun but the three of us together, we were like super amazing together! Once we got started it was like the three musketeers ready to take action.

"It said, paintball guns, cheap! Thirty bucks per gun!"

"You want us to shoot them with paintball guns?" Ok, I had to admit this was starting to sound real exciting.

"Yeah! Think about it! There just walking along minding there own business and them BAM! They get hit with a paintball! Think of the shock! Think of their reaction! It will be priceless," Quinn only shook her head.

"Seriously guys, I thought you'd go for the break into their door room and put lining on their toilet seats or tea bags in their shower heads or something, not go this extreme."

"Those are lame," I told Quinn. "You have to think outside of the box."

That's why you're my bro," Puck told me. "You always get what I'm talking about."

I looked over at Quinn who looked a little jealous. I thought it was kind of funny. Even though she knew I would never go for him she still got jealous of how close we were. Oh course they had a deeper connection but it was still funny to look at.

"Whatever, I'm not doing it," Quinn scoffed.

"I guess it's just you and me then," Puck said looking at me.

"Looks like it." I told him.

"Just don't come crying to me when someone gets hurt," Quinn told us.

"No one's going to get hurt Quinny," Puck said teasing her.

Quin gave Puck a little shove, which resulted in Puck wrapping his arms around her in a big bear hug, it looked cute if Quinn wasn't trying to struggle out of it. I new deep down she liked it.

"We going to get the others in on it?" I asked.

"We should," Puck told me.

"You guys make me think we should be back in high school the way you're acting," Quinn told us. Although I wouldn't mind that, I owned my high school. Puck and me were to two on top. Yeah I bitched and lashed out at everyone not to mention people were scared of Puck because he threw everyone in the dumpster but still it was great.

People didn't mess with us, we knew who our true friends were and that was good enough for us. Me being on the cheerio's and everything and Puck being on the football team, we were like the perfect couple... that's right we dating for a little but that was before I figured out who I really was.

"Oh high school, I remember those days," Puck said.

It was now day four out of six for frosh week. By now Puck and I had gotten our paintball guns, loaded them and were ready to take action. We were meeting up with the guys this afternoon to put our plan into action. I felt like I was in some sort of spy movie the way I looked.

The pranks had already started and most of the first years were trying to avoid as many people as they could. I heard that someone gabbed a first year and threw him into a pool of pudding or that another two people got tied up in a tree for the whole night. Of course there were people who had Quinn's idea and put tea bags in the shower head but those were really lame jokes. I liked the ones who thought about it, like the people that put fake eviction letters on the door rooms, watching the first years freak out over that was hilarious.

The first years aren't that happy about the pranks that are going on now but they'll learn to deal with it, it's only for the first week anyway and next year when they're in their second year then they can prank the first years.

I met the others in the walkway by the forest, it was really nice because it had a sense of freshness to it. I really liked how you could see the beach or walk in a forest. I saw the others were waiting for Puck and me so I ran up to one of my best friends who gave me a big hug. His name was Sam.

"Sam! Are you ready!" I asked.

"Hell yeah I am!" He sais to me.

"I've been practicing my shooting skills to now I think I'm pretty pro," my friend Josh said to me. I laughed a little because he was incapable of shooting or hurting anyone.

"Yeah ok, we'll see," I said.

"I'm telling the truth!" He said in his defense. "I've been learning to dodge too."

"Then dodge this," I say quickly lifting my paint ball gun up at him and shoot him right in the gut, he bends over in pain and I chuckle a little to myself. He looks at me with that glare. My friends around me are laughing while Puck it just shaking he head, I can see he's trying to hold back him laughter.

"Come on Satan, let's be nice," Puck told me.

Satan, that's my nickname because we'll in not very nice.

"I was not ready for that," Josh said hunched over.

"Nice dodging," I tell him.

"Shut up."

"Alright now that we've learn Josh still can't dodge anything are we all ready to get going and shoot some first years?" Sam asked holding up his gun.

"Let's go!" Puck said.

I followed them through the forest, I seriously didn't know why I was at the back of the line, I'm always first, always the leader. I will not have this so I start pushing my way up through the crowd, well my friends and making my way to the front with Puck. I see the clearing up ahead and all the first years running to where they're supposed to be, none of them want to get caught up in the pranks.

There is a first year standing by a tree, it looks like she's trying to take a picture of the bird resting on the tree. She's just standing there totally un fazed by the pranks going on this week. First years run past here, they have the right idea, no one wants to get caught up in this. This girl by the tree is the perfect first target, she won't know what hit her.

I motion to Puck that I want the first hit, he nods at me. I load my gun up and hold it up, it lines perfectly towards her, too bad she didn't take her photo fast enough, now she'll never get that good photo.

"Don't miss," Puck said to me.

"Shut up, Santana never misses," I tell him with a smirk on my face.

I see her, I pull the trigger on my gun and the paint ball fly towards her. I see her just about to take her picture when SMACK! The paint ball hits her right in the shoulder, she cries out in pain holding her shoulder. She knows she's been hit with a paint ball, she looks around frantically and see's us towards the bushes killing ourselves with laughter. She doesn't seem to run to Sam picks up his gun and shoots her again, in the stomach this time. Green paint splashes everywhere, the power causes her to fly back onto the ground.

That is the funniest thing I've ever seen, I can't stop laughing, she doesn't seem to think it's funny but when do the fresh men ever think it's funny. Puck and me are killing ourselves with laughter, that had to be the best reaction I saw! She scrambled to get up, grab her camera and get the heck out of here. She was so scared, too bad for her.

"That was great!" Puck said.

"Poor girl was scared out of her mind," Sam said.

"On to target two!" Josh said excitedly.

Not far from where we were before there were two people walking, two first years. They must have been dating because while they were walking they were holding hands just minding their own business. Puck loaded his gun, he couldn't wait for this moment, he loved having paint ball fights.

He aimed and shot twice, once at the girl which hit her in the side and once at the guy who happened to get hit by the paintball in his leg, she squealed in pain while the guy beside her tried to suck it up and act like a tough guy, they now knew they were being targeted as the next first years for prank week. Puck looked at me, I could tell he wasn't satisfied with the reaction of the guy. He didn't like that he tried to suck up his pain.

"Give him a shot," he told me.

Normally I didn't listen to other people but I wanted to shoot him just as badly to get a better reaction out of him. So I shot at his stomach and then again at his arm. This time he fell down and cried in pain. The girl beside his grabbed his hand trying to pull him up to get out of the line of fire. I couldn't help but laugh how ridicules they both looked.

As they ran off I saw some other guy reading to himself on the park bench. He was oblivious to everything that just happened, when the other first years saw the couple that got shot ran off themselves so they wouldn't be the next target but not this guy. That didn't go over to well with me and the rest of the guys.

"I think we should teach this guy to be more aware of his surroundings," Sam said to us. I nodded agreeing with him.

"Can I shoot!" Josh asked real excited.

"You shoot?" Puck asked in surprise. I was in shock as well.

"Yeah please?"

"No offence Josh but you can't aim for you life," Sam told him.

"I promise I won't miss," he said.

"San what do you think?"

"Well I don't know, if he misses then we didn't teach him his lesson." I told him.

"I promise I wont!" Josh said again, he was really determined to shoot.

"Fine, go for it," I told him.

He seemed really excited, like when a little kid wakes up of Christmas morning as runs down stairs to open his presents. It was kind of sad actually. He aimed at the man, all of us were watching in suspense. He shot, we watched the paint ball fly at the man and then all are faces sunk in disappointed. The man jumped out and held his foot, that's right he got shot in the foot.

"Well I didn't miss," Josh said as we rolled our eyes.

The man reading the book was about to get up and run off, no we couldn't have that. I nudged Puck in the side, he seemed to have caught on quit quickly because he shot the first year three more times. Once in the stomach, the leg and in the arm, the man cried out in pain and tired to get away as fast as his body would take him. We started laughing again.

"All in favor of not letting Josh shoot anyone again?" I asked as everyone but Josh rose their hand.

"Come on guys, it was my warm up shot," he pleaded.

"Sure it was," I tell him.

He didn't really like my attitude towards him.

We were on a role, it was a few hours later and we had managed to shoot many first years. Word got around in those hours that we were on a move looking for fresh bate to shoot. The other second, third and fourth years were giving us mad props when they saw us. We were kind of the rulers of prank week. It felt good.

Whenever the first years saw us they started running in the other direction, so we decided we had to sneak around more carefully. We must have shot many more people but the last one we shot, I don't know I think that should have been our last one. The guy seemed to have rolled around in a lot of pain. When we shot him he was taken by surprise that he threw all his books up in the air and they landed in the water fountain. I know how expensive books can be so I did feel kind of bad.

Puck, Sam and Josh were determined to find one more person to shoot while I was a little uncertain about it. I think we should just go back to the beach and hang out there.

I was a little behind, up ahead I saw the guys trying to get me to hurry up, I guess they had found their next target. I ran up to them and that's when I saw her. She had long blonde hair, eyes that were as blue as they sky she looked perfect. I could feel my heart start to race, I couldn't peal my eyes away, she looked so graceful so innocent. As the wind blew in her hair and could feel my heart take off.

Suddenly I heard Puck load his gun, he was going to hit this girl with a paintball. He was going to hit her beauty, I've never felt this way just by looking at someone for a few seconds. I didn't know why I suddenly felt this way, I always thought girls were hot before but she was just to amazing for words.

"Stop Puck! Didn't the last guy you shot made it clear that we should stop this," I told him.

"Just one more person San," he said.

"I think that maybe you've gone to far, come on lets just go back on the beach and hang out." I tell him.

"Oh I see what's going on," Sam said to me with a smile. "You think she's hot."

_Shit! _

"I do not!" I said in my defense. But they could see right through my lie.

"You totally do!" Puck said to me with a smile.

"Just don't shoot her okay," I tell them.

"Fine, whatever makes you happy San," Puck told me with a wink.

Just then I heard a shot go off, I look to Puck and then to Sam, none of them were holding there guns up. Then I look to Josh who had just shot the girl. I saw her, she lost her balance and flew off the side walk. Of course there had to be a hill where she was walking, with bushes at the bottom and of course he had to fall down the hill. The shot must have been really strong.

"Josh! What the fuck!" I yell at him.

"I told you I could shoot," he said.

"You threw her off the hill!" I yell. Shit, shit, shit! She fell off the hill, I hope she's ok.

I drop my paintball gun with the guys and run to the edge of the hill. I see her at the bottom, she's lying on the ground with a great big paint explosion on his shirt. She's not moving, _oh shit! _I run down the hill, we'll I slid down and rest by her side. That's not all I see. I recognize this girl when I see her up close.

She went to my high school! I don't know her name but I do recognize her. She was the quiet one, the one that only had a couple of friends that people sometimes picked on. She had gotten so much more beautiful, I mean now that she had her hair down and grown up a little she was amazing. I bet she would know who I was when she woke up, probably that mean bitch that made high school a living hell for her and all the younger students. I felt bad now, worse then before.

"Can you hear me?" I yelled hoping she would get up and wake up. "Hello?"

A soft moan came from her, I sighed in relief.

"She living?" Puck called down at me. I looked at him telling him to shut up I didn't want any distractions. I looked back at the girl to see her eyes flutter open.

"Hi, are you okay? I'm so sorry," I tell her once her eyes open and she's looking at me. Her eyes are even more amazing close up, I can't look away from them, they just have some lock on me. She moans again slowly lifting her head up, I try to catch her and held her up to her feet.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

She looks so innocent, until her face changes and she snaps. I look at her in shock. "Are you kidding me! You shot me with a fucking pain ball!" She said angrily. If I remember correctly this girl didn't have a back bone in high school, she's come along way.

"That wasn't me, it was my friend, I'm really sorry," I say, for some reason I can't have this girl be mad at me even if I hardly know her.

"Whatever," she scoffed.

"Please, let me help you, you must have hit your head."

"I'm fine, why ever would I want someone like you, who thinks it's fun to target all the first years with paintball guns to help me. Honestly, just get away." She told me.

"But..." I tried to say before she interrupted me.

"I really don't want to talk to you," she said as she headed up the hill angrily. Puck, Sam and Josh moved out of her way, they could tell how angry she was and they did not want to get in the way of that. I chased after her and grabbed her wrist.

"Let go! Haven't you done enough damage today," She told me.

"I'm sorry, please I was wrong and that takes a lot because I don't apologize to anyone." I tell her.

"Oh I know, trust me. You're still the same old Santana, who took her bitch from high school and brought it to university," she said.

She remembered me.

"No, I've changed I mean it," I say as convincing as possible, obviously she doesn't think so because she scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Right, you've changed. I remember you, dating Puck thinking you were to top shit, tearing everyone down. Please, you haven't changed one bit," the blonde girl said as she turned around and left me standing there.

I felt like screaming back, I have changed, I don't like Puck anymore! I like you! She was so pretty, I never felt like this before, I needed to get to know her, let her know I had changed that I cared for her. I didn't even know if she rolled like that but I needed to find out. I'd rather be her friends then nothing at all.

"Tough luck," Puck said to me as he came up from behind.

"No, I'm not giving up that easy." I say.

"Wow, what happened to you. You never fight for you're girls, they don't come to you, you always move onto the next one. She's got to be pretty special if you want to fight for her."

"You know, we went to high school with her?" I ask, maybe he remembers her.

"I know. Brittany. She was in Glee club, I threw a couple slushies at her every now and then." I looked at Puck in shock. Her name was Brittany!

"You did what?" I ask in shock. "Ugh, loser." I tell him.

"You really like her."

"Maybe," I tell him, not wanting to let all my feelings out.

"Cute."

**Let me know if you like this story, should I continue? I never know. **


	2. Morning Coffee Run

A couple of days have gone past and I haven't been able to get Brittany out of my mind, she's all that I've been thinking of. Her smile, those amazing blue eyes, the long blonde hair, I just can't pull my mind away from her. I'm sitting now on my bed in my apartment going through old school yearbooks looking for her.

I flip through some pages, I was in grade 11 in this yearbook which would make her in grade 9, I quickly flip to the freshmen and look through all the names, thank god their in alphabetical order or this would take way longer then I wanted it too. I flip through the pages and there in front of my is Brittany Pierce, grade 9, member of the Glee Club. I remember now, that's why Puck must of slushied her, the members of the Glee club always go slushied.

I flipped through a few more pages, there in front of my was more clubs, she was the member of one of those smart clubs, looking back at her pictures she looked so different. I quickly put that year book away and pulled out the next book when I was in grade 12 and she was in grade 10. There she was again but she looked different, she looked more like the Brittany I saw.

I wondered why I never paid attention to her before at school, she looked so amazing, even her picture looked good and school pictures never look good. I smiled when I saw her. I flip though a couple more photo's and then I see a picture of Puck, and me I'm wearing my cheerio's uniform. There's another photo beside that one of some other random people but that's when I notice something in the background.

In the background of the photo is Puck holding an empty slushy cup, I'm laughing at the people he just slushied which happened to be Brittany and her friend. Oh God, no wonder why she hates me so much, I couldn't believe that I had noticed her but not really noticed her. I felt so bad.

That's when Puck came into my room and noticed me looking at my yearbooks.

"Looking up Brittany?" He asked.

"Yeah, we were so horrible to her," I tell him.

"I know, I remember her."

"What else did I do to her?" I asked, I can't really remember, I'm not sure that I even want to know but if I'm going to apologize I need to remember what I did.

"It's not what you did all together, but what all the cheerio's did. Don't you remember anything?"

"No really."

"They would throw them all in dumpsters, slushies, um they would, well you all through her and her friends in a pool one day because you thought they looked like they could use some refreshing." He told me.

"Oh my god! No," I said barring my hands in my face.

"No offence, but if I were her, I wouldn't be that forgiving towards you," he told me.

"I feel so bad," I tell him. "What do I do?"

"I donno, you should try talking to Quinn, I'm not too good at those things." Puck told me.

"QUINN!" I call as he jumps up in shock.

"I didn't mean now, right by my ear, jeeze you almost burst my ear drum."

"I think you'll survive," I tell him as I see Quinn coming in my room eating a slice of pizza. Pucks eyes look like they are about to jump out of his head.

"Kitchen," she tells him and with that, Puck is gone. "So, what's the problem?"

"Well I saw this girl the other day," I start to say when Quinn cuts me off.

"Oh my god! San! You like her don't you," I can't believe it, she knows me to well and I'm not doing a very good job at hiding it when I feel myself blushing.

"There's a problem though," I tell her the story of how I bullied her in high school and how I shot her with a paintball and that she didn't look very forgiving towards me. I told her I really wanted to make everything better because she seemed to special and that I couldn't get her out of my mind. I wasn't good with telling feelings but It had to try to tell Quinn if she was going to help me at all.

"Well I'd try to talk to her," she tells me.

"Um were you listening to anything?" I ask. "She hates me."

"No, she hates the old you, she doesn't know the new you yet. Find her, apologize, get her talking, take it slow at first and maybe she'll forgive you."

"You think?" I ask.

"I don't know, but that's all the advice I can give you for now until you talk to her."

"Yeah, pull up you're lady balls and go talk to her," Puck said appearing back in the doorway with a slice of pizza. I take my pillow and throw it at him, it hits his head. "Totally uncalled for."

"No, you deserved that." I told him.

I decided to get out of the apartment for the day and walk around the university, mainly to search for Brittany. There had to be some way I could get her to forgive me. Normally when people were mad at me I would shrug it off, I didn't care so why was it so different this time, why wouldn't I just forget about her and move on. When people I've liked in the past call me bitch or hate my guts I'd just move on.

I walked around the university a few more times, now that prank week was over the first years had been all calm and were going from class to class, I thankfully didn't have class for the next two days and I was alright with that.

There was a small café up ahead of me and I was getting a little hungry from my daily adventure across the university so I decided to go in and grab a bite to eat, or maybe a quick sandwich I could take with me so I could continue my journey. I liked this café, it was small and the people were friendly, unlike me.

"I'll take a chicken sandwich," I tell the cashier.

"Magic word Santana?" she told me. I knew her from first year, she was my friend Tina, she would give me discounts and stuff so I normally would be nice to her, normally but most of the time I still was a bitch and people just had to accept that way the way I acted.

"Please," I said with a sarcastic smile.

"Much better," she told me handing me the sandwich. "So what are you doing out here today. I thought on your days off you spend your time at the beach."

"I'm looking for someone," I tell her.

"Well good luck looking for them. Hey, I'd love to talk longer but the faster I serve these people the faster I get to leave and I;m meeting someone soon..." I knew where this was going, she wanted to get rid of me.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll leave don't you worry." I say.

"By Santana," she sais to me as I wave bye.

As I walk out of the café eating my sandwich I don't look where I'm going. I hate how people always disrespect the people looking down, if they bump into them or something, they blame us. That's why I always look down when I'm coming out of a store or something, if they bump into me it gives me an excuse to lash out at them.

Sure enough, as I'm walking out of the café, I get at least four steps out when someone comes crashing into me, not looking where they're going. I fall onto the ground, still holding onto my sandwich, thank god that didn't get knocked down or I'd really have gone all lima heights.

"What's your problem!" I say still looking to the ground.

"Sorry," I hear a small voice. That's when I realize I recognize it, I know I've only heard it one time before but it sticks with me like glue. I look up and see a blonde sitting on the floor, she must have fallen over too. Brittany.

"No, it's my fault I wasn't looking where I was going, sorry," I say. What is wrong with me, I know I'm trying to be nice to her but I'm never this nice. I never apologize when people bump into me.

I stand up and hold out my hand to help her up. She looks up and I guess she realized it's me because her whole facial expression chanced from happy and sorry to grumpy and that oh shit it's you face. I could tell she really didn't want to be here with me. She ignored my hand and got up on her own.

"I'm really sorry," I tell her.

"Yeah, whatever. I'm sure you're just saying that." She tells me.

"I mean it," I say.

"Well I'm just gonna go now," she tells me and it about to turn away when without thinking I quickly go and gently reach for her wrist holding her back.

"Brittany wait," I tell her, her head quickly snaps back to look at me with surprise.

"How do you know my name?" she asked.

"Well I went to high school with you, I remembered you," I tell her.

"Oh so then you remember all the things you did to me back then. Boy you are a real bitch," she said, I look down knowing that I deserved that.

"I'm really sorry, for everything I did. I was a stupid kid. But I've changed" I tell her.

"Right, changed," she mocks me. "That's why you went around shooting all the first years with paint ball guns, not thinking about the consequences like you always do."

"It was prank week, I didn't even shoot you. What was I supposed to do," I ask.

"Not participate! You don't get it do you, I don't care that you did or didn't shoot me, the point is you shot other first years and you probably were having a great time watching them all suffer."

"Please forgive me, I'm really sorry," I tell her. I never knew I could actually be so sorry towards someone until I was standing in front of Brittany trying to get her forgiveness.

"Why do you want me to forgive you so badly, it's not like we'd be friends or anything," she tells me coldly.

"But I..." she cuts me off.

"Don't even try," she said. Suddenly I see the back of her head and within seconds she's gone. I stand there helpless wishing that I had one more chance. I'm about to leave when something catches my eye on the ground. It looked like a key, a key for a door room. Brittany must have dropped it when we crashed into each other.

I looked closely at the key, it had some stuff attached to it, like a key chain of a duck. I thought that was cute and it had a card attached to it as well. The card said the name of the door room she was staying at. _Gebel. _She was staying at the Gebel residents. I had the best idea pop into my head at that moment, well maybe not the best idea but I though it was pretty smart of me at the time.

I went back into the coffee store and looked around the room, it looked packed with first years, this was perfect. Hopefully they don't reorganize me from the paint ball incident and if they do I hope they will be forgiving. I went to the middle of the room the make sure the attention was all on me.

"Excuse me? Does anyone here live at the Gebel residents?" I ask hoping someone will.

"I do," said a girl off sitting in the corner with her coffee and computer. She had brown hair and a weird kind of style, knee high pocodot dress with ankle socks on and little black shoes. She looked short as well. I smiled when I saw her despite the fact that she looked a little strange, she was in the same res and Brittany and that was good enough for me.

I made my way over to her table and sat down holding my coffee, she looked up at me strangely, probably wondering why I was randomly sitting with her.

"I need a favor from you," I told her.

"Umm..." she said.

"Don't worry, it's not a big favor. There is someone in your door room that I need to talk to, it just that we're not really talking right now and I need an excuse to come to that door room. Can I," as I was about to say this I realized how stupid this actually is and how she might react when I say it.

"Can I maybe, pretend to know you, pretend I'm visiting you, so I might be able to run into them somewhere in the res?"

She looked at me again, strangely.

"Let me guess, you like this person and want to make up for whatever you did?" She told me.

"Kind of."

"Hmm, well I do like love so why not," that answer took me completely off guard.

"Wait, seriously?"

"Yeah, I guess. It's not like it's gonna hurt anyone."

"Thank you so much," okay, despite how weird this girl looked or how short she was she had just made my day. I might have a chance now, at least I don't have to wonder the whole campus trying to look for Brittany, now I know her door room. _Wow, I sound like a stalker. Santana, just concentrate on making her forgive you. You have a friend it that res anyone... well sort of friend. _

"I'm in room 214 if you ever need help or just want to chat." She tells me with a big smile on her face that is kind of creeping me out.

"Oh yeah, thanks."

0000000000000000000

I see Puck on the beach running up to Quinn. She doesn't notice he's coming, I can only imagine what's going to happen next. Of course, I see Puck give Quinn a little shove into the ocean. She turns around and hits him in the arm.

"Alright you guys setting down," now it's my turn to get them to behave.

"Santana, now you know how I feel when I try and get you two to behave." Quinn tells me.

"Yeah but when Puck and I fool around we are friends, when you guys fool around, it's so much more then that," I say with a little smirk of my face.

"Santana!" Quinn yells, I only giggle.

"Oh come on you guys, it's so obvious how you two are crazy about each other."

"What are you talking about?" Puck said defensively.

"Oh stop your whining and ask her out already," I tell him, Quinn looks at me and then looks at Puck, I know she wants him to ask her out.

"I like her as a friend San, get you're head out of your ass." He smiles at me.

"Jerk," I say. Quinn looks down, I can tell she's trying to hide how hurt she is.

"I'll be inside," Quinn sais leaving.

Once she's gone I turn back to Puck and slap him in the arm, he looked up at me with a shocked expression, I only role my eyes at him because he is just so blind in some situations.

"She likes you! Ask her," I tell him.

"I don't know if I can," he tells me.

"Why's that?"

"Because, what if she expects me to be this perfect guy, I haven't been in a real committed relationship since my last year of high school, do you know how long that's been!" He tells me which is true, he's just had one night stands since then or flings, nothing serious.

"She knows that. Just take a chance."

"You think?"

"I know, come on, I'm always right."

"Not always."

"Yes always, no one can deny it. Not even you." I smile.

0000000000000000

I take a deep breath as I am about to enter the Gebel residents. I really hope Brittany is in here, I want to give her back her key as well as talk to her, let her forgive me. I hate how she can't stand me, it really crushes me. I pull out Brittany's key and unlock the door so I can enter.

I forgot what these first year door rooms look like from since the last time I was in here. They are mostly messy and sometimes they have a funky smell towards them. All though they were fun at the time I really like my student house right now, living off campus with my friends. It's way better.

I think to myself how to find Brittany's room. I could ask someone but that might pull into question how I got into the door room first, I guess my only option would be to walk around here like an idiot and hopefully run into her.

I walk around for at least half an hour, boy I really need to find something better to do with my time, I must have circled the whole residents at least 6 or 7 times. I don't know how I've not given up but I haven't and for some reason I don't want to. I see a guy look at him I know he's checking me out along with his friends that have just been standing there for the last couple of minutes. I role my eyes at them.

There's a few other people who are staring at me, guys and girls they can't help but check me out which I don't mind, I know I'm insanely hot. Just when I thought people would leave me alone a guys stands right in front of my look me in the eye. He probably wants to ask me out or something.

"I've noticed you walking around here for like the past hour or half an hour," he sais.

"Oh, yeah..." I say.

"Don't you have anything better to do, you're kind of a creep," he tell me. I'm shocked, that's not what I was expecting.

"Um I actually here for someone, I'm looking for a room."

"What room?"

I'm about to say Brittany but then something comes over me and I don't really want to. I do but, no I don't get scared, Santana Lopez never get's scared. Then I remember that other girl I met, what did she say her room was again.

214. Room 214," I finally say.

"Oh yeah, I know where that is, I'll take you there if you want?"

"Yeah thanks."

As we walk down I can see him staring at me from the corner of my eyes, this is getting real annoying. I wish he's stop. When he goes on like that for the next few minutes I can't take it anymore.

"Do you mind! Quit gawking at me," I snap.

"Sorry, you're just hot," he sais very bluntly.

"Yeah, I know. Deal with the fact you'll never have this." I say annoyed.

"Whatever, here were are," he sais rolling his eyes and leave me before I can say anything to him, not like I was going to thank him anyway. He did stare at me, I think he owed me from that. I knock on the door hoping the girl is there. Finally after what seems to be a few minutes she opens the door.

"Hey!" She said a little too happy to see me.

"Uh hi, some guy thought I was a creep in here so I thought I'd come by," I say.

"Oh well, did you find the person you were looking for?"

"Not yet," I say with a smile.

"Well you can come in for a little, if you want?"

"I guess."

I go into her room, her side of the room has many posters of Barbra Streisand covering the walls, silver stars everywhere and like microphones and stuff, I'm guessing she likes performing. Since now she is actually standing I see how short she actually is, it makes me laugh.

"You're like a midget," I say.

"That's not very nice."

"I can't help it, I speak what's on my mind."

"Clearly." She said.

"So do you want to tell me who this person is you're looking for? Maybe I can help you find them faster then just rome around the halls looking for them."

"No thanks."

"Are you sure, it'll make time go faster."

I know she's probably right, but at this moment I don't want Brittany to know I like her, what if this girl was friends with her or something, she would then defiantly say I have a crush on her.

"I'm Rachel by the way," she said to me.

"Oh hey, I'm Santana." I tell her.

"Nice to meet you."

"Yeah, I guess you're okay as well," I say, she was the reason I could visit Brittany after all.

"So please will you tell me who they are? I won't tell promise," Rachel sais.

"Well um, do you no someone named..." and that's when her room mate walked through the door. My eyes opened wide with surprise. Ok, I officially didn't mind midget.

"Brittany?"

**Let me know what you think. Did you guys like it? **


	3. Don't Give Up On Me

I just stared at Brittany in awe as she came into the room, I quickly had to remember how to breath and that I had to shut my mouth or I would start drooling and that would be very unattractive. I couldn't believe that this Rachel girl was her roommate, I would have come to visit a long time ago if I had known.

I must have looked like an idiot just staring at her, at least I managed to say something. I was in shock and when you're in shock you can't really function or at least that's what I'm like.

Brittany kind of looked at me funny, I think she was in shock I was in her room. I think she was trying to process what was happening right now, I could tell she wasn't all that happy to see me. I could see it in her eyes, those big blue beautiful eyes. Even when she looked mad or annoyed her eyes still looked amazing I couldn't manage to look away.

She stared at me some more, I think she was trying to figure out what to say, I know I had caught her off guard, she had done the same to me. This wasn't how I envisioned meeting her again, now she probably thinks I came to her room just to see her when the truth is I didn't even know she lived here. Yeah I came into her residence but I would never just wait in her room for her to come back, I felt very out of place.

"What are you doing here?" She finally said to me.

"I came to visit Rachel... my friend." I said. Was Rachel my friend? I guess since I was in her room and she did seem happy to see me when I came. I had said it out loud so its not like I could pull back what I said.

"You know Rachel?" She asked me.

"Yeah."

"Oh yes," Rachel said really perky.

"When did you meet?" I knew she was testing me.

"Oh, we met a couple of d..." I quickly cut Rachel off before she could spoil everything. I didn't want Brittany to know I made friends with her just so I could see the blue-eyed goddess again.

"Months ago, we met a couple of months ago, right Rachel," I looked at her sharply. Thankfully she was sitting behind me so Brittany couldn't see the look I was giving Rachel. Thankfully she wasn't one of those slow people that took forever to catch onto hints. Rachel nodded slowly.

"Oh, yeah. We go way back," Rachel said.

"A couple months ago isn't way back, even I know that," Brittany said.

"Well it feels like we've known each other for ages, right Rachel?" I give her the look again.

"Oh yes! We are such great friends."

"Mhm," is the only thing Brittany manages to say. I think she doesn't really believe us, I'm usually great and lying to people but for some reason I really it's really hard to lie to her, I look to Rachel for help but she's looking at Brittany.

"So how did you guys meet?"

"My mum is friends with her mum, they played Tennis together," Rachel said. I was surprised with the back-story Rachel gave. I didn't complain, I looked back at Brittany who seemed satisfied with the story but she still rolled her eyes because she still didn't enjoy my company.

"I see, so you just came here to talk to Rachel?" She asked me raising her eyebrow.

"Actually, funny story, she came here because she's in lo..." I cut her off again, jeeze this girl really can't keep her mouth shut.

"Yes, I came here to visit her."

"Well, you visited, now go." Brittany said.

"What?" I asked in shock, I knew she wouldn't be thrilled seeing me but I didn't think she would be so harsh. She always seemed too sweet and innocent.

"I said leave," Brittany said turning away from me.

"Brit, what's you problem," Rachel asked suddenly.

"I don't want her in my room," Brittany said looking at me sharply. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach, it started to turn and I couldn't help but feel crushed.

"Well it's my room too and if I want her here then here she will stay," I couldn't believe Rachel was standing up for me only after a few days of knowing her.

"Then I'll leave," Brittany said.

No Brittany couldn't go, I had come this close to having another conversation with her again. Well I guess we had a conversation moments ago but all she did was bitch to me. I don't blame her, I had done it to her all of high school, I guess this was her way for getting back at me for all the hurt I caused. I still couldn't live that down, it made me want to cry for how much I hurt her and that's rare because Santana Lopez never cries for anyone.

Rachel kept looking back at Brittany and me trying to figure out our history, I could tell it was confusing the hell out of her. She was going to figure it out eventually so I just went right for it, I didn't want Brittany to hate me forever, I couldn't, she had made an affect on me, an affect that I couldn't forget. I haven't had a full conversation with her and she's already invading all my thoughts and dreams, that has to mean something.

"Britt please stay," I say calmly, I feel that I'm about to cry but I can't show it.

"Don't call me that," She snapped. "You don't have the right."

"Please, I'm sorry."

"Yeah I hardly doubt that. I remember what you used to do. I remember how all the teachers always made you apologize for throwing slushies at people or bitching to us, you always had to be set up to apologize, it never came naturally to you so tell me, who set you up to it this time!"

I couldn't have felt more awful.

"No one did. I'm a chanced person I promise."

"Bull shit."

"You don't even know me, I haven't seen you in two years! How do you know if I've changed or not? Please don't dwell in the past, just get over it," I say standing up and raising my voice a little. She looks at me in shock, I realize that I've just raised my voice and I feel awful. "I'm so sorry."

"Are you serious! Of course you haven't changed! You shot me with a paintball for gods sake! Is that your new slushy!" It wasn't a question.

"Wait, she was the one that shot you with a paintball?" Rachel said, pause. Then she burst out laughing, I looked at her confused. "When Brit came home covered in paint! You just made my life!"

"Shut up Rach!" Brittany snapped.

"You should have seen her, she came in all bubbly and happy, I thought she would have been mad but she wasn't, and then she kept babbling how she had the most amazing day ever," I looked over to Brittany who was dying from embarrassment.

Then it clicked, Brittany came back happy, even after she yelled at me. She came back happy because I shot her with a paintball, that's got to mean something! Maybe she likes me! Wait, I should calm down and not look too much into the situation before I get hurt. I didn't even know if she swings that that. I couldn't help it, I was so excited but I tried to contain it.

"You were happy?" I asked.

"No! Of course not! You shot me with a paint ball! Why would I be happy!"

I could see right through her lie.

"What? But you were..." Brit quickly cut Rachel off.

"Can you shut up!" Brittany snapped again and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Sorry Santana, she's just in a grumpy mood right now," Rachel told me.

"Because she is here!" Brittany said pointing to me.

"Please Britt, can you give me a chance to make it up to you?"

"Why do you want to make it up to me so badly? What about all the other people you bullied, what about them? You haven't made it up to anyone them!"

"How do you know that!" I ask.

"Well have you?"

"No." I say honestly. This is the most honestly I've been to someone in a long time.

"Exactly, so why do you want to be my friend?"

"I donno, there's just something about you."

"Well find someone else because according to you two years ago, there are hundreds of me's out there who are just as loserish and we all deserve to be slushied. So go make friends with them."

"I was a stupid kid back then, I didn't mean any of it," I say.

"I think you should give her another chance Brit," Rachel said, ok I know this girl was annoying but she wasn't all that bad. After all she was helping me get Brittany.

"No thanks," she said giving me a look. Man if looks could kill. I felt like my insides had all melted and not in the good way. I could feel like legs getting weak and my energy just dropped down.

"I understand," I said in a small voice. "I think I'll go now."

"You don't have to," Rachel said.

"I think it would be best."

"I agree with her," Brittany said coldly towards me.

"I'm really sorry for disturbing you."

I'm about to head out when I remembered something, I still have Brittany's card I was going to give it back to her, its not like I'm going to be coming to visit anytime soon now that I know she really hates me. I reach into my pocket and search for it, I see Brittany still looking at me, I feel like her eyes are daggers.

"Here, you dropped this the other day, I wanted to return it," I say handing her the card.

"Oh thanks," she said not that friendly. I walk out of the room hearing the door close behind me my head drifted down, I had really screwed up.

**Brittany's Point of View**

Santana had just left, thank god. I really couldn't stand that girl, after all the things she did to me in high school I had enough and who does she think she is trying to get another chance. I don't think so. I looked over to Rachel who was staring at me she didn't look too impressed.

"What?" I ask.

"You really didn't have to be so harsh," she said.

"You came after she left! The year after she graduated, you have no idea what she put me through."

"You're right I don't."

"Exactly."

"So tell me," Rachel said.

I knew I should tell Rachel, she was my best friend after all, we were in Glee club together, she wanted to be a star and I wanted to dance so we didn't take up each others light. We made friends right away, oh course she came when I entered grade 11 but at least she came.

"She threw slushies in my face, slammed me into lockers, she did everything to make my life hell," I yell, not because I'm mad at Rachel but because I'm so wound up by how infuriating Santana makes me.

"Ok, that seems bad but if you ask me it looks like she's changed and she wants to make it up to you."

"I don't care."

"Why? You love giving people second chances you always see the good in people so why is this so different?"

"It just is okay!" I tell her.

"You can tell me Brittany."

"There's nothing to tell," I say stubbornly.

"Then why are you making such a big deal out of this?"

"I'm not you are!"

"Then why are you yelling? Sometimes it's better to talk about things Britt, it might make you feel better," there she goes again trying to give me a lecture.

"I don't want to talk about it Rach, can you please drop it."

"But she's nice and obviously likes you! She wants to be your friend!"

"That's the problem okay!"

"You don't want another friend?"

"No! I course I want her as a friend! But I can't do that to myself not again!" I yell, I can feel the tears creeping up on my, I try to hold them back but a few escape my grasp and they trickle down. I try to whip them away before Rachel see's but I'm not quick enough.

"Britt, what do you mean again?" she asks me more calmly.

"After everything she did to me back then, I still... I... looked I really liked her back then okay, like _really_ liked her, I might have even loved her. I don't know, I just... she hurt me so much, I would come home crying and broken and after all that I still liked her, I don't want that to happen again."

Rachel knew I swung both ways and she was cool with it, she had two dads after all but that wasn't the scary part, the scary part just happened. I had never told anyone how much I liked Santana back in high school. I hated myself for loving her but I did and I didn't want that to happen again.

Britt.." she said, I could tell she didn't know what to say.

"It doesn't matter anyway, she's straight, she _only_ wants to be friends." At this moment I realize that I'm practically balling my eyes out crying as hard as I can and I hate it. I try to control my tears but they just keep coming out. Rachel moves closer to me and gives me a hug.

"Britt, I had no idea. I'm sorry."

"There was just something about her, and then when I saw her again, when she shot me with a paintball I... I know she did change, I remembered people talking at school in senior year about how she had changed. When I saw her I didn't want to believe it, it was the only thing that let me hate her. To push her away."

"Maybe just take the chance. What's the worst thing that will happen?"

"I could fall for her again. Rach, do you know how hard it is to love someone when they don't love you back. It's horrible."

"I know, but honestly you don't know if she's into you or not."

"Oh course she's not, she was dating Puck, the most popular guy in high school."

"So."

"That day, when I got shot with a paintball, he was there with her."

"Oh."

"Yeah! They're probably still dating."

"You don't know that."

"I have a pretty good idea."

"Your jumping to conclusions, you haven't seen this girl in over two years, of course some things have changed but you know nothing about her life so don't pretend you do." Rachel always sets me straight.

"Still she dated him in high school and..." she cut me off _again_.

"So, you dated Artie." She told me.

"Well yeah, I swing both ways and I was trying to cover up the fact I like girls," I told her.

"She could have been doing the same thing."

"I doubt it. Besides I got over her, it doesn't matter anymore, I'm done with her. I'm sick of getting hurt."

"I'm not saying you should just jump into another friendship with her but I can see it's hurting you more to stay away from her and be mad then to forgive her."

"No, I can't. I hate her!"

"Do you really?" Rachel asked me. She could always see through me, I always hated that, I could never lie to this girl she always saw right through it.

"Yes."

"Britt."

I sighed. "No."

"Exactly."

"I just don't know if I can deal with that, at least not right now."

"I get that. Take your time just please don't let this control your life. I don't like seeing you so sad."

"It won't, I promise," I tell her.

"Good, you know sometimes I worry about you Britt."

"Worry less."

"You know I can't do that," she smiles. I know that, she knows that, she's always in my business trying to protect me. I don't mind it, its nice to know there's someone in your life you can really count on.

A couple of weeks past and I haven't seen Santana since that day she came to my door room and gave me back my key. I have to say as much as I'm trying to fight it I can't stop thinking about her, I feel like I'm a freshman again or a sophomore back in high school thinking about my crush.

I have to get her out of my mind, I'm through with all the hurting and getting my hopes up only for them to be broken down again. I don't understand why she would want to be my friend anyway, she never showed any interest back in high school, the only thing she was sure of was how to make my life miserable.

My mind needed a break from all this thinking so I decided to go to my dance studio; that should help get my mind off of things. There was a class going on when I entered but thankfully there were different dance rooms so I went into an empty one and blast the music. I moved with the music trying to get my routine right, I had a show coming up soon and I wanted my piece to be perfect.

After a long days work out I went for my water bottle and chugged it down, I didn't realize how out of breath I was until I started drinking. I heard the door open and saw my good friend Mike come in with the biggest smile on his face.

"Hey Brit!"

"Hey Mike," I said.

"Your dance is really coming along," he told me.

"Thanks, I really want it to be perfect."

"I'd say it's perfect."

He was a little hesitance I could tell there was a reason he came to talk to me, he was fidgeting with his fingers and I know he only does that when he's nervous. I knew he wasn't asking me out because he had his girlfriend Tina who happened to be a good friend of mine and went to high school with me. She was one of the other targets Santana used to slushy.

"Just ask," I said.

"How did you...?"

"Come on, I've known you forever, ask me."

"Okay, well I have this friend and he saw you dancing... well I might have told him you were an amazing dancer so he wanted to come watch, and he really liked you..." Mike started to say.

"Where's this going?" I ask.

"Well I kind of owe him a favor because he introduced me to Tina, so he was wondering, well he wanted me to ask you if you would go on a date with him?"

"Oh."

"Would you? Just one date? Please as a favor to me."

"Well I..." he cut me off.

"Here I'll show you a picture of him," Mike pulled out his phone and went onto facebook scrolling through a bunch of name until he reached a James Henry, I looked at it. He wasn't that bad looking, I could totally see myself dating someone like this but the truth is I'm not really in the mood to date.

I know this was a favor to Mike and he was one of my best friends, maybe one date wouldn't hurt. I could test the waters again try dating. I haven't dated anyone since middle of my senior year and that didn't end too well. That was the year I came out, I dated a girl for at least 6 months until she broke my heart.

"So...?"

"Sure, I guess," I say.

"Thanks Britt, I promise I'll make it up to you," he tells me.

"Ice cream?"

"You want ice cream?" I nodded.

"Yeah ok, tomorrow we'll go, I promised Tina we'd have a date night today," he told me.

"Where are you going?" I asked, I love getting in peoples business, especially when it involves relationships. I don't like when people get involved in my dating life but I like to get involved in others.

"I'm taking her to this nice restaurant called Generosity, the new one down the street."

"Oh yeah I heard of that, let me know how it is."

"The date or the food?"

"Both!" I say smiling.

"Cool, you hanging with Kurt tonight?"

"I think, I haven't seen that boy in ages."

Mike looked at me again, great I've attracted more attention to myself, I'm not one to try and grab people's attention. I like to keep to myself and just get on with what I need to do.

"You okay? You seem a little off today?"

"Yeah, I've just... never mind." _Stupid! _I say to myself, now I really know he's going to ask what's wrong. I can never just keep my mouth shut.

"I can help you if you want."

"It's okay, can you just have Tina call me?" I ask.

If anyone can help me it's Tina, she was there when Santana slushied us, she was there when I got pushed into locket and got made fun of, she was there for everything. She would defiantly know how to get Santana off my mind, she would remind me why she was such a bad person and that I should focus on something else.

That was a perfect idea, I don't know why I hadn't thought of calling Tina before.

"Oh yeah sure."

"Thanks, sorry its just, something that she'll understand. A high school thing."

"Of course," he said with a smile. "I'll let her know.

"Thanks Mike! Now go get ready for your date."

**Let me know what you think? Hope you all liked the chapter! **


	4. Past

**Santana's Point Of View**

"Santana!"

"SANTANA!"

"Yo San, will ya get your hearing checked and answer me already!"

I heard Puck calling me. I didn't want to answer him. A, it was nine in the morning on a Saturday and I just had a long night at the bar with my friends so I'm a little hung over. There was no way I would be getting out of bed at this hour, and B, Puck could wait. He never says anything important anyway. It was probably something useless, like what type of cereal he should eat for breakfast or 'Quinn said this to me, does that mean she likes me' and Santana Lopez does not answer to these types of questions.

I have such a bad hangover from last night; I think if I even tied to get up I'd fall back down onto my nice comfy bed from my dizziness. After my hard couple of weeks of realizing that I will never have a relationship or friendship with Brittany I decided to go out and get drunk. Stop thinking about everything and just drink.

That wasn't one of my smartest idea's my head burns and aches like I just got hit by a bus and every part of my body hurts because apparently I fell on the floor from loosing my balance. I don't think I've gotten that drunk since my last year of high school. I lie on my pillow watching the clock tick, time seems to be moving slowly.

"Santana! Bitch, I'm calling you!" Oh gosh is he still calling me, I guess I kind of leant to tune him out, two years of living with him does that to you.

I groan, if he wants to speak to me then he's going to have to move his big ass off the couch, climb up those steps and come into my room because there is not way I'm moving. I see some water by my bedside table, thank god for Quinn. She helped me to bed last night after seeing what condition I was in. She takes good care of me, that and she knew that if she didn't help me and try and sober me up my hangover would be much worse and I don't think she wanted to hear me complain for the whole day.

I hear footsteps coming up from the stairs, so Puck finally got up and decided to come to my room. I'm happy about that but not happy for how loud he was being, I have such a bad head ach and his big elephant feet are not helping it.

There is no way I want to actually talk to him at this moment. Maybe if I just pretend that I'm sleeping he'll leave me alone, but then again I didn't answer him so obviously he thinks I'm sleeping and is still coming up to my room. That boy will never learn to take a hint; he didn't even get hints back in high school.

Sometimes I wish I had an apartment to myself but then I think to myself and realize that as annoying as Puck and Quinn are I still like their company and would be very lonely. So yes, I am happy that I have them hear. As much as I hate to admit it I can't do everything on my own.

My door slammed open, oh great here he comes. I closed my eyes and prayed that he would leave me alone but I really doubt that. I pulled my covers up to my face and snuggled into my blanket getting all comfy.

"Santana," I heard a whisper.

"Sanny San, San," What the fudge was with that nickname? No thanks, no into that.

I pulled the covers up higher and shifted to my left turning my back towards his face. _Just go away Puck, now. _I thought to myself. Ugh, it's too early for this.

"San I know you have a hangover but I know you're not actually sleeping to look at me, I have something important to tell you."

"Ughhkdsfmmmh," was all I managed to say.

"Quinn wanted me to get you, please get up." Puck said.

"Noooo," I moaned.

"Would you rather me come and get you or Quinn, you know she's not in a very good mood from having to take care of you last night. I would personally much rather me."

"Why does she want me up?"

"I donno, I'm just the messenger man."

"More like boy."

"Fine if you're like that I won't tell you the other piece of information I learnt." I didn't say anything I just groaned and close my eyes back again. "It's about Brittany."

I bounced up facing Puck. I bit too quickly because I felt my room spinning and I just fell back into the bed, he laughed at me, it wasn't nice. "Shut up." I told him.

"What did you find out?"

"You know how our old school, our high school has those Halloween reunion parties for all the past students that we never go too?"

"Yeah, what about them?"

"Well I think this year you might be interested in going because I was speaking to this guys this morning who also happened to go to our high school in the year below us. Well he knows Brittany and he said that she was thinking of going."

"This isn't one of your plans to get me to go somewhere with you that I don't want to be, is it?"

"No, no of course not. I'm actually serious this time."

"Well in that case..." I leaped up from my bed again feeling a little more stable this time and wrapped Puck in a big bear hug. I guess he was a little surprised by my hug attack because he collapsed on the floor, me falling on top of him. I didn't realize I was still hugging him until now but I could care less, I was so happy at this point. This was the best day ever! I could hardly wait! I'm going to see Brittany again!

"Wow San, calm down," I get off of him and brush myself off.

"Sorry," I say, I can feel my cheeks turning bright red even if that isn't really possible.

"You're so whipped," I slap Puck on the arm, he just keeps smiling at me.

"Are not!"

"Yeah you are, and you haven't even spent a lot of time with this girl, I can't wait to see what you'll be like when you actually start going out with her."

I tackled Puck on the floor, no one messes with me and gets away with it. I put him in a headlock but he keeps laughing. Then he does something that I'm not expecting in the slightest. He flips me onto my bag and pins me down to the floor, I stuggle to get out but his grip is really strong.

"No so tough now are you," he says, but I keep fighting him. I try to push him off but he's really strong, when did this happen. Has he been going to the gym or something, that's a shocker.

"Stop, stop," I say.

"Nope, not until you admit your not the toughest anymore."

"Not a chance."

"Then I'm not moving." I grunt. I seriously need to work out anymore this is humiliating. Just as I'm about to win! I know I'm about to win I hear the door open again and I see someone's feet. Quinn's. _We're in trouble now._ I think to myself, I look up at Pucks face and he has that oh shit look on. His mouth is in an O shape, I don't want to even look at Quinn's expression right now, she's probably jealous even if she knows its nothing serious.

"Hey Quinn," he said getting off of me.

"Puck, downstairs." Puck hurried out my door and ran downstairs, and he thinks _I'm_ whipped. I slowly crawled back into my bed until I heard Quinn cough. It was meant to get my attention. I turned to look at her.

"You think you're so sneaky don't you, downstairs."

I grabbed a sweater and made my way downstairs; great now I have to learn about all the things I did last night. Just what I wasn't, I really hope it's not about Brittany. Quinn followed me downstairs and made me sit on the couch while she stood in front of me with her arms crossed. _Oh great, she's going to get all motherly on me. _

"Santana, I'm worried about you. I've never seen you act like this you haven't been yourself lately. I know you're sad you don't have Brittany but seriously get a grip and live your life!"

"Mmmh, you never were great at pep talks Quinny," I say, she didn't think that was funny, she just frowns.

"Seriously, you have to do something with your life. All you've been doing is going to classes and sitting on the beach, what happened to the Santana I know! The fun one! The one that bitches to everyone and goes out to cause trouble?"

"Can you just let this go," I say to her.

"No! At first I thought this was a faze or something because all the girls you've liked, lasts like a week, but I guess she's not a faze so either do something about it or move on. Last night was terrible, do you know how drunk you were!" Did she seriously think I didn't know how drunk I got? I was paying for that right now.

"I..." she cut me off.

"I'm not done talking. You came home so drunk; you passed out on the floor. I thought you were smarter then that, I'm worried about you."

"Sorry," is the only thing I manage to say.

"Are you gonna go?"

"Go where?" I ask, she was confusing me now.

"To your high school Halloween reunion?"

"I want to, but I don't think I can. I haven't been that good with my money lately. I might have just enough for a plan ride to Lima but I don't think I'll have enough to come back."

"That's where you're wrong," I looked up puzzled.

Quinn sits down beside me on the couch; she ruffles thought her bag that sits on the floor near her. I wonder what she is talking about, now I'm really confused and usually I'm pretty good at understanding everything. What am I wrong about, and why is she taking so long to find whatever is in that bag of hers.

Finally she looks back at me. Wait it that what I think it is! Is that really what she's holding! Quinn give me two tickets, two tickets to Lima. I can't believe it; my face has just dropped wide open with shock. I didn't know what to think. I can't believe Quinn did this for me.

"You didn't," I say in shock.

"Puck and me decided it would be good for you. You can make it up to us later," she smiled.

"I can't, you can't."

"Shut up and take the tickets."

"Thanks."

"Oh and Puck's gonna go with you."

"Love you Quinn," I say wrapping her in a big bear hug.

"I know, I'm pretty awesome," she says.

"For once I can agree with you."

Here I am, back in Lima, Ohio. Puck and me will be staying with my parents, they were pretty happy when I told them I would be coming back to visit. I only see them for summer vacation or Christmas. I think they are glad they get to see me three times in the year other then just two.

My room looked the same as always, blue walls, black sheets, like I never left high school. I guess it will be kind of nice to see my other friends again. The thing I'm really dreading is seeing all the people I bullied, I really hurt them all, meeting Brittany really made that clear to me. I hoped they wouldn't all still hate me like Brittany did but I really can't blame them if they did so thank god I have Puck with me, I don't think I'd be able to do this if I didn't have him.

The reunion was tomorrow and I was pretty tried plus I still needed to find a Halloween costume to wear for the event. I thought I'd just crash in my bed and sleep and tomorrow I could go out to buy me something to wear. That would be the best idea for everyone because no one liked a cranky Santana.

000000000000000

I was right. There are a lot of people that go back to reunions. There must have been hundreds of people here. I was pretty comfortable with what I was wearing; I was dressed as a ladybug. Sure I would have rather been something more, well me, like a nurse or something but this was cute too. I could totally pull it off and I must say I look pretty hot.

Puck was standing beside me, we made it clear that we would not have matching costumes or get those cute couple costumes because I didn't want people to get the wrong idea about us. I didn't want them to get the wrong idea about me. I wanted to show them I've changed, maybe if I convince other people I might convince Brittany. I really hope she would be here, she loved Halloween, I remember that from high school.

She would always put a lot of effort into her costume and walked around the halls all happy showing it off. I remember for my last year of high school Puck got fed up with her happy face and slushied her costume, she cried after that. Just the thought of that made my stomach turn; I felt cold I couldn't feel worse for that.

As I walked into the gym with Puck all my memories rushed back, the dodge ball game where I had challenged this loser named Finn, well he wasn't a loser to the school because he was dating the head cheerleader but to me he was a loser, he had man boobs. Or when the Glee club performed Toxic by Britney Spears and everyone was screaming for them. That was about the only Glee club performance I enjoyed watching. That's when Brittany first caught my eye, after that performance she looked different to me and I knew I had to get ride of whatever I was feeling for her out of my head. I now know what I was really feeling but I was too scared to admit it back then.

I felt like the only reason I bullied her was because I had a little crush on her but didn't want to admit it to me or anyone else, so I just dated Puck hoping that all those feelings would disappear. Obviously it didn't work because here I am again, having feelings for Brittany but this time I'm going to do it right.

As I walked into the gym I saw all eyes turn to Puck and me. Back in high school I would have loved all the attention on me but right now, it didn't feel so good. If I was really going to call it something, I think I felt _shy. _That is rare. Nothing scares me. I didn't know why I felt this afraid to see everyone again, Puck must have sensed my hesitation because he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the crowd to a spot that was by ourselves.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I guess I'm just a little overwhelmed seeing everyone again."

"Don't worry, I'll be here with you."

"Thanks," I said.

I took a look at the gym again, it changed since the last time I've been here, they got new basketball nets and re-did the lines on the ground. It looked cleaner. I really wish they had re-done the gym while I was still here, it would have been really nice for cheerio's practice.

"Well, well look who decided to show up," I quickly turn around and see one of my best friends from high school.

"Amy!" I say excitedly.

"Hey San, good to see you again." We hugged. "And look, you brought Puck with you, cute."

"How are you?" I ask.

"Pretty good, still stuck in Lima but next year I decided that I would break out and go to New York or something."

"That's great! Still cheerleading?"

"Little bit, I help coach every now and then with the cheerios."

"She still here? She must be really old now."

"Actually I'm still in pretty good shape Sandbags," I snap my head back around. There standing behind me was Coach Sue and she heard me. Shit.

"Oh sorry."

"You know I don't take apologies, what's happened to you little Latina?"

"She's changed," Puck quickly said.

"Seems like it," Amy said. "Is there any bitch still left in you."

"Of course," I say.

"Well it was good to see you again, I'm gonna go see other people okay," Amy said leaving.

"Um Puck, I'm going to grab something to drink," I told him leaving him behind. I was now feeling stronger to go out and see who was here. I really wanted to find Brittany, she her I did care.

I made my way to the food table because we all know Santana loves her food. There were some people working the snack bar, I recognized them, two of them were in Brittany's grade and two were in the year below me. Great, three out of the four were in Glee club, just my luck.

As I made my way to the table they stared at me. I really hated to be stared at now a days. I grabbed something to drink and saw that they were still staring at me.

"What?" I finally said.

"You're Santana Lopez." One of them said.

"The one and only." I say with a smile, hoping they will see this new side of me.

"You made my high school life a living hell," the girl said to me, I looked down at my feet now feeling really bad.

"Yeah sorry," I mumbled just enough for them to hear me.

"You what?" They asked in surprise.

"I'm sorry."

"You're apologizing?" One boy asked, I swear he's gay.

"I am."

"Well that's good enough for me," he said. "I'm Kurt by the way, and this is my boyfriend Blaine." I was right! I smiled at them, they seemed like pretty decent people.

"Nice to meet you."

"Kurt! I thought you were going to bring me something to drink," I heard a voice from behind me. Oh gosh, that sounded like. I slowly turn around, my heart rate starts to speed up, and my eyes practically jump out of my head. I can't believe what I am seeing.

"Brittany."

"Santana," she says a little surprised to see me.

I can't believe this, this is like the greatest day of my life. She's dressed in a Tinkerbelle costume. Her dress is short, it's covering her butt showing off those amazing legs of her's that I can't seem to stop looking at. I have to fight the eager of looking at her legs or I might start to freak her out. I look back up at her and see that the top of her dress is low cut showing me exactly what I want to see and her face, her long blonde hair goes past her shoulders, she looks perfect. I love her blue eyes and how they sparkle in the light.

She looks like a real fairy, so gorgeous. I stare at her for a few more seconds until she gives me a weird look and I realize that I've been staring a little too long. I quickly look away in some other direction.

I feel my heart rate speed up, I really wish she was mine I like her so much. I try had to keep the smile off my face, it I let it show it would be the cheesiest grin ever and I was no ready to show her that.

"You two know each other?" Kurt asked in surprises.

"We go to school together," I said.

"Yeah, lucky me," she said sarcastically.

"She's still mad at me for what I did to her in high school," I told Kurt who looked surprise when I told me that. He gave Brittany a weird look too.

"Wait she hates you? But back in high school she l..." Brittany quickly cut him off, now I was really interested in what he was going to say.

"KURT!" Brittany snapped.

"Sorry, but if you ask me it looks like you've changed Santana, good for you."

"Uhh, thanks," I really hoped having Kurt forgive me could change Brittany's opinion towards me as well but from the look on her face it didn't seem like she did.

"So can I have that drink now?" She asked Kurt.

"You can have mine, I just poured it and don't worry, I didn't drink from it yet," I said too her without thinking. She just looked at me, the look that tells someone to fuck off. It felt like my heart just dropped to the ground, I felt my whole face drop. I think Kurt saw it because he looked sorry for me. I don't know why he would feel bad; he shouldn't after everything I did to him in high school.

"I can get my own," she said coldly.

"Britt," Kurt said to him.

"No I'm so done with this," Brittany said taking her drink and leaving. I watched her leave. My heart sunk. This was not what I expected to happen. I feel so disconnected right now, my breath beguines to slow down and my heart beats like a drill, my thoughts run around my head like their running from one another.

Right now I feel like I'm living in a black whole where I everything I like gets sucked in and I'm left with nothing, I can feel tears about to pour out of my eyes and I try to hold them in. There is no way I'm showing emotion at this high school reunion with everyone looking at me. I am a stone show no emotion.

"She didn't mean that you know," Kurt says to me, but I ignore him. I walk away.

That's when I see Puck, he see's me too and can read my emotions to he comes running up to me and gives me a big hug kissing the top of my head. I'm go glad he came with me.

"Well look who it is. The _it _couple is back," great this is the last person I want to talk to right now.

"Karofsky," Puck says as he lets me go.

"I little birdie told me that Satan's turned nice..." he said in shock. It sounded like he was displeased.

"That's right."

"I think you need a reminder that you have the power, I have an idea." He said handing me a slushy.

"What no! I'm not doing this to anyone," I said trying to hand it back to him but he doesn't take it.

"Dude take it back, she doesn't want it," Puck said.

"Oh wow, I didn't realize you both turned soft," he said to us. Then he looked around and quickly grabbed someone from the crowed. I couldn't believe it he grabbed Brittany. No, this was not okay. He was going suffer. I was going to punch his balls if he even had any. He was not going to hurt Brittany, no one was. "Slushy her, she was in Glee, she doesn't deserve to be here."

"No! If anyone doesn't deserve to be here it's you. Now you're going to take this slushy back turn you lady ass back around and get the hell out of here," I snap of him.

"Fine I'll take the slushy back," he says grabbing it out of my hand.

"Good, now turn around and walk away," I look around me and realize how much of a crowd we have drawn in. Almost the whole school is looking at us again. I feel like I'm back in high school expect this time I am the one defending someone, they all look impressed I'm not the one with the slushy.

"Fine," he begins to turn around when he stops, "wait I forgot something," he said.

That's when I realize what he just did. He took that slushy and chucked it at Brittany's face, she looks so hurt, so cold, like a sad little puppy. This was not okay with me. I can't believe he just did that to poor innocent Brittany. I feel the rage burn up inside me. This is bullshit! No one ever hurts Brittany! He has just crossed the line.

"Dude what the hell!" Puck snapped.

I looked over at Brittany to see that she had blue ice in her eyes and was struggling to whip it all away. She could barley open her eyes. She was covered in slushy, it was all over her hair, her costume, I could tell she was about to start crying and when Brittany cries, well lets say that snix is officially back.

"You fucking retard! No one touches Brittany got that!" I saw walking up the Karofsky clenching my fists together.

"Come on, I'm showing you what you're missing."

"Fuck you!" I couldn't hold back any longer, the next thing I knew my first met his face and he was hunched over holding it like a little baby. "You little baby! Once a jerk always one. Get the fuck out of here! You are not welcome!" I yelled.

"The fuck Santana," he said to me as he ran out through the doors. I was still trying to manage my anger.

That's when I noticed Brittany wasn't around me, I ran out of the gym looking for the washroom. That's where she would have gone, that's where they all went to get cleaned up. I slowly opened the door to find Brittany sitting on the floor crying, she had tried to get the slushy out but she didn't do a really good job. I felt my heart sink as I looked at her. I couldn't believe he would do that to her, she's sweet and good and perfect. She's the last person that deserved that.

"Britt," I say in a gentle voice.

She looks up at me.

"Go away," she says.

I don't listen to her, instead I go take at seat on the floor next to her and just stay there. She looks at me confused, and I just feel even more horrible inside. We sit in silence for a couple of minutes.

"Why are you being so nice to me? Why did you stick up for me," she suddenly asked.

"Because you're the last person that deserved that slushy," I say.

"Oh."

"That should have been me, I should have been the one to get slushied. I deserve it the most. I was horrible back then," I tell her.

"No, you don't deserve it either, don't say that."

"I do, I'm a horrible person, I bullied you so much back then, I really don't blame you for hating me. I don't blame anyone for hating me, I deserve. I should have taken that slushy, it's all my fault this happened to you." I looked down at my hands, feeling the tears swell up.

"Santana don't say that. You're a good person and I don't hate you. I just, I... never mind," she says.

"You can tell me you know, I won't tell anyone. I promise." I look at her and she just shakes her head.

"Thanks though."

"I'm really sorry, for everything I've done to you, and for shooting you with a paintball," she chuckled.

"Yeah well technically it wasn't you, so I guess I can forgive you for that." I laugh.

"Thanks. We should get you cleaned up," I tell her.

I stand up and pull some paper towels out and put a little bit of water on them. I sit back down in front of Brittany and very gently begin to get the slushy off her face. I should have done this before our heart to heart because it's all gotten very sticky now which makes it harder to come off.

I take some ice out of her hair and make sure it looks all pretty again. I hold her cheek while I run the paper over her other cheek getting the stickiness off. As I touch her cheek I feel my heart jump a little. I get the fluttery feeling, which is the best feeling in the world. I look at her and she looks like she's blushing but I then think to myself that I'm only seeing what I want to see.

I get the last little bit of slushy out of her hair, its not perfect but it's all I can do right now in the school bathroom. I never thought it would be this hard to get slushy off.

"Done," I tell her.

"Thanks." She says with a smile. "So wanna tell me the real reason you're mad at me?"

"I'm not mad at you."

"Are you sure, because it really seems that way."

"I know, but I'm not doing it out of anger. You should know that," I look at Brittany confused. She senses it. "I just don't want to get hurt again."

"I am never going to hurt you. I will never hurt you again." I tell her as convincing as I can.

"But that's the thing, you already have," My hear drops. What have I done to make Brittany so sad? I try and think back but I really can't think of anything. Then she speaks again and I think I'm starting to get it. "You and Puck are really cute together."

"Wait? You think I'm with Puck?" She nods. "Britt he's really not my type. I'm gay," I say with a little laugh. She looks up at me and I see her eyes just explode out from her eyes. She looks at me in shock.

"What?"

"Yeah, we're not dating, he's just a good friend," the biggest smile I've ever seen creeps up on her face, she looks away from me to hid it but I've already seen it and she looks so cute. I can see her through the mirror now and I can see she's blushing. I think she's really cute.

"I promise I never meant to hurt you," I told her.

"I know," she said.

"Can I make it up to you?"

"I donno."

"Oh."

We sat in silence again for a few minutes. The hearting in my heart had some back again, I needed Brittany, I wasn't really sure I needed her until this point but sitting with her actually having a conversation made me realize that I like her so much, I don't know what I'd do without her.

I was so deep in thought, in my sorrows I hadn't even noticed how close we had gotten together. I looked back up and realized her face was really close to mine. I could feel her breath on me, which made my stomach turn over, in the good way. She was looking at me while I kept looking up at her eyes and then down to her lips. Her perfect shaped lips, how I just wanted to kiss her right now.

"Can I ask you something?" She finally spoke up.

"Anything." I said. I didn't want her to move, I wanted her to stay this close to me. Everything felt so perfect.

"Do you like me?" The question took me a little by surprise. I looked down wondering what to say, I was probably taking a little too much time because I saw Brittany's expression change. It went from determination to worry. I held onto my breath and squeezed my eyes shut, opening them again and then...

"Yes," I told her. I could see her smiling, she was smiling!

That's when she leant in even closer to me. I could feel my pulse rising and my stomach flipping out of control. Then finally, the gap between us closed and she was kissing me.

**Thanks for all the comments, u guys are great so I'm trying to update faster, but with exams going on right now it might be hard. Hope you all like the story so far! **


	5. Loose Feelings

It was a week later that I had kissed Brittany. It was a week later and I still hadn't talked to Brittany. After we kissed, the most amazing kiss I even had, I helped her up and we went back to the party. She didn't really want to stay because she still was sticky from the slushy so she decided it would be best if she went to her hotel to get cleaned up. She thanked me again for helping her and then went out in a little bit of a hurry.

After that I decided to go find Puck and convince him to leave. My only reason for being there had just left and I didn't want to stick around any longer to deal with Karofsky. Puck and I decided to go home, he obviously knew something had happened. According to him I looked red as a tomato, which I really doubt but I was too happy to argue.

Now we were both back in California, back in the apartment. I wanted to speak to Brittany but truth is I didn't have her number and every time I went over to her residence Rachel told me she was at a class or was out. I figured that I should leave my phone number but Rachel told me that I should talk to her in person than over the phone. She told me that Brittany doesn't really like using the phone, which I find really surprising.

I went downstairs and saw Puck coming back from his jog. I went down to the beach to meet him; he was all sweaty it was really nasty. He tried to give me a hug but I pushed him away, there was no way I was about to let that sweaty body touch me, never ever!

"Hey guess who I ran into this morning?" He said to me.

"Who?" I asked.

"Brittany," I stood there in shock. I hadn't seen her for a week and I really wanted to. I missed her, I wanted to kiss her again, hold her again. I would go back this afternoon to her res and check if she was there.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah but the weirdest thing happened," now he had me interested. "I ran over to her to say hi but she looked at me like she had never met me. She gave me a quick hi and then said she really had to go. What's up with that?"

"Maybe she really had to go," I state the obvious.

"Whatever, it was weird."

"What are you trying to say Puck?"

"I donno, something seems up with her. She seemed like she was in a hurry to get away from me."

"Well have you met you, if I saw you running up to me I would get a little creeped out and try to get away from you," I teased him.

"Oh you're so funny," he said sarcastically. I couldn't help but feel more pleased with myself.

"It's probably nothing," I tell him, but the truth I'm getting a little worried now. Did Brittany avoid Puck because she knew he was friends with me? Had Brittany just been avoiding me this whole time? Every time I went to go see her she was never there and Rachel never let me give my number to her.

I probably was thinking too much into this, I always seemed to do that and Puck was making it worse by telling me his story. I would just go find her and talk to her about it today and if Rachel told me she didn't think it was a good idea to give my number to her then I would sit outside her door room door and wait until she came back.

"I'm just warning you, I don't want you to get hurt or anything."

"Please I'm Santana Lopez, I don't get hurt," but I do, and it sucks.

"Yeah... okay," Puck could see through my lie but decided not to say anything about it. "So, do you know where Quinn is?" He asked me trying to change the subject.

"I don't know. Probably inside studying or something."

"Oh."

Why don't you just ask her out already?"

"It's not that simple."

Sure it is, hey Quinn I really like you and I was just wondering if you would like to go out with me Friday night."

"I'm flattered Lopez but you're really not my type," I jump up in surprise and turn around to see Quinn smiling at me. I'm so embarrassed, stupid Puck, she knows I'm kidding but I still hate him for it.

"Oh you wish you could date me," I joked.

"No thanks, I'd rather not have all that baggage you come with."

"What! I am baggage free!" I tell her.

"Sure you are," typical Quinn, she's always trying to get under my skin. Always tries to get me annoyed well two can play that game. Let's see how Quinn likes it.

"So Quinny, how's that picture of you and Puck you keep in your room," I immediately see her expression change to worry, her cheeks turn red, she embarrassed. I got her right where I want her.

"You have a picture of me in your room?" Puck asked in surprise.

"No! Santana's lying!" She snaps.

"That doesn't look like the face of someone who's lying," I say, I am defiantly getting under her skin now.

"Shut up Santana!" She tells me but I can't help but laugh.

"Yeah, well I'm gonna go and find the person I like and actually try to do something about it unlike some people I know," I reference both her and Puck, they know I'm talking about them because they both look down at their feet and say nothing.

As I'm walking away I heard Quinn call from behind me. "Bitch!"

"Glad you finally figured that out," I yell back smiling. I am satisfied with what I did, Quinn knows she shouldn't mess with snix. Snix always wins.

I walk back over to Brittany's residence, I don't know how I'm gonna get in this time. I don't have a key ever since I gave Brittany's back and the last couple of times I have been lucky. Some idiot forgot to lock the door once and the other time someone was running late for class so they ran out the door and I managed to catch it before it closed, I doubt I would have that luck this time.

Once I finally managed to get into the building, by waiting outside for a few minutes until someone came out the door to have a smoke and let me in, thinking I lived there, I was now on my way to Brittany's. I marched right up to that door more determined then anything to go after what I want.

I wasn't the type of person who moped around all day because I couldn't get the person that I wanted or I couldn't build up the courage to ask someone out on a date. I was the type of person that would go after what I wanted; it's a waste of time to sit on your butt and think about what you want to do, why don't people actually go do it! I never understood that about people, Santana Lopez never moped; this was a moping free zone.

Yes I cried at times but I would suck it up and be tough. Crying shows weakness and I am not weak. I can't remember that last time I cried. I get that you can cry over something tragic like a break up after three years or the death of a loved one but crying over something like getting rejected or falling and hurting yourself that's just stupid. Rejection does nothing to me, I am a stone and a stone I will stay.

If Brittany rejected me, I would be okay with that I was a stone. If she rejected me I wouldn't let it hurt, of course it wouldn't hurt me nothing hurts me. I will be brave and not cry.

My papi always told me that crying showed weakness and he was right. I wouldn't let Brittany get to me, she wasn't that special... was she? No she wasn't I could find someone better and I wasn't about to let anyone into my little circle of emotions. I've always been strong. The only people that have even seen me cry are Puck and Quinn and that was for something really serious. That was when this guy Finn had practically shoved me out of the closet. Puck was right there by my side and punch that guy so hard he broke his noise.

I stand in front of Brittany's door getting ready to knock, I tried to give myself a little pep talk but I was never good at those things. I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't take no for an answer this time. I knock on the door and instantly find myself staring at Rachel not Brittany, of course.

"Brittany's not here," she says.

"Of course, she's never here," I tell her.

"Sorry," she's about to close the door when I stop her.

"Wait, can you please give her my number? I really need to talk to her and so please can you give her my number and tell her to call me." I ask.

"You know she doesn't like the phone."

"I know but I still..." I get interrupted when I heard something slam into something in Rachel's room, it sounds like another person fell of bumped into something because the next noise I hear is...

"Shit!" they say.

"Who's that?" I ask.

"Oh um... that's, uh... my friend," she sound suspicious.

"Oh I see, well can I give you Brittany my number please?" I ask again.

"I really think you should talk to her in person," she tells me.

"Yeah but I..." The same person interrupts me again.

"Close the door," the person says. I become very confused either the person in the room doesn't like me or something's going on. I am very confused so I look back at Rachel, she can tell that I am demanding an answer.

"I have um... a boy in here."

"Oh." Is all I manage to say because from what I heard it sounded like a girls voice. It sounded like a familiar girls voice but I block it out of my head because that's what's best for me at the moment. It's what's best because I am a stone and if I think about who it really could be then I don't think I will be a stone anymore.

"I'll leave you then," I say to Rachel as she closes the door. I guess that really didn't go as I planned. I stand outside the door thinking about what just happened. I try not to let it get to me, I guess I'll just wait outside the residence until Brittany comes home from where ever she is.

I am about to leave when I hear something from inside the room, it's not something bad but there are two voices and now I'm sure the other voice is a girl's voice. I lean closer to the door and listen.

"You can't keep doing this," Rachel says.

"I know." The other voice says, and yes that is defiantly a girls voice.

"Wanna tell me what happened?" Rachel asks.

"Not really, I don't want to talk about it right now."

"Look if you want my advice, whatever it is you really should talk to her because you can't keep doing this. It's hurting her and I know you might not care but you need to be the better person Britt," that last word stung.

Brittany was in the door room the whole time. She was avoiding me. That hurt. I really didn't know why she was avoiding me, everything was going amazing at the reunion. I mean apart from the fact that she got slushied and had to leave early because she was all sticky I thought we had a connection. The way she kissed me and looked into my eyes afterwards. The way she smiled and cutely touched my cheek. I really thought she liked me.

I couldn't help thinking that she regretted everything that happened but here she was in her room with her roommate who had just lied to my face telling me that she was out. She didn't want to see me that was clear but I still wanted to know why. She told me she forgave me, if that was the case then why does she not want to talk to me. I couldn't feel worse then right now. I already told myself that I wouldn't let her get to me, I won't fall sad because of her. I've got to be strong, I've got to be the rock, push away all the feelings. I told myself that after my last relationship, I never get hurt like that again so if I just suppress all the feelings then that shouldn't happen. I don't care what Brittany thinks of me anymore, if she doesn't want to see me then she won't. I'm over it. I'll just move on to the next one, that's pretty much what I've done my whole life so it's not like she's any different right? No, she not. I have to shove all thoughts of her out of my head.

I walk outside her residence never to look back again. Stupid feelings aren't even important; I guess that's why Puck and Quinn haven't done anything to act on their feelings. It's easier that way. I don't know why I never held back my feelings before, it was so much better, you don't get hurt.

Two days later and I still haven't spoken to Brittany. I'm glad actually, Quinn might say that differently but I am glad. I can get over her and have no emotions towards anyone. Feelings can suck it. Yeah I've been going out to the bar the last two days with my other friends but I haven't got that drunk like I did before the reunion, that's an improvement. I've been going to my classes and I've actually been studying, this is the new Santana Lopez and if people don't like it then they can get lost. I don't care, why should I care about anything.

Quinn was buying some coffee up ahead of me. We were in the coffee store again, the store where I had first met Rachel and met Brittany a few seconds before that. I remember she looked so innocent and perfect, that long blonde hair flowing on her shouldered and those blue eyes, oh god those blue eyes! I shook my head trying to get Brittany out of my head it was hard. _Stop it Santana. She doesn't like you just give up. _I hated feeling venerable, I can't believe I was actually admitting to be venerable right now.

I looked down to my feet, they were interesting and looking at them made me shift my focus onto something other than Brittany. Quinn had told me before to get over her so that is what I'm doing, or trying to do. No I'm doing it, that faster I admit to having no feelings toward Brittany the faster I can forget about her.

Quinn comes back and hands me my coffee, I don't really feel like having anything to drink at this moment but she was trying to by nice and since I haven't been the easiest person to be around the last couple of days I owe it to her to be more friendly. I smile at her and hope that's enough to show that I'm thankful for it. I really don't feel like saying anything.

I take a sip of the coffee cough a little bit. Just quiet enough so Quinn doesn't hear me. This is not the way I like my coffee so I decide that I will pretend to drink it and as time passes I'll throw it out.

As we're walking down the sidewalk suddenly out of nowhere Quinn wraps her arms around me and hugs me tightly. I drop the coffee cut because I am taken with surprise. Well I guess I don't need to worry about pretending to finish it now. I am slightly shocked. Why did Quinn suddenly hug me. I squirm a little and she backs off, I look at her confused demanding an answer, she knows I want one but she then she hold out her coffee cup and wants me to take it. Now I am really confused. Quinn is never this nice to me under any circumstance and she definitely never hugs me randomly.

"What was that?" I ask.

"Can't I hug my best friend?"

"Yeah but not like that. Jeeze Quinn you kind of attacked me, am I just that attractive that you decided you couldn't keep you hands off me any longer," I say arching my eyebrow.

"Please, don't flatter yourself," my mouth opens wide. "You might want to close that, don't want to catch flies."

"Explain yourself missy."

"There's nothing to explain, I just wanted to hug my friend and then you dropped your coffee so I thought that you would want mine," she told me.

"Yeah..." I say. I I'm getting tried of the weird look she has on her face and I really don't feel like just standing here because she is starting to freak me out so I go to turn around to walk the other way when I suddenly feel a grip on my arm. It's a tight grip and it kind of hurts.

"You can't go that way," she says quickly.

"Please I can go anyway I like," I take my hand out of her grip and turn around. Then I finally see why Quinn was acting so strangely. She was trying to protect me, trying to get me to not see what I'm looking at right now. There not to far away from me is Brittany, holding hands with some _guy_. She's smiling and laughing and having a great time. I can feel my stomach tighten and I begin to feel sick. I feel a tare inside of me.

"You okay?" Quinn asks.

"Fine," I say through my teeth.

"Do you want to go," I look at Brittany before I decide. I want to leave, I want to leave more then anything. I want to get rid of this feeling I have inside of me right now. I hate it, I hate that I feel like I'm going to burst into tears at any second but I won't let anyone have the satisfactory of seeing my cry. I want to go but I want answers as well. After everything that happened I want to know why Brittany is with this guy and not with me. I want to know why she's holding hands with him, laughing at his jokes then being with me.

"No, I have to do something," I say pulling up my courage. Quinn nods, she understands.

I walk up to Brittany with more determination than ever, I decide to put whatever emotion I was feeling behind me and turn it into rage. I'm better at dealing with rage then what I was feeling before.

"Brittany!" I look at her straight in the face she is surprised. I can't help but stare at those blue eyes of hers but I know that if I want to do this properly that I have to stop.

"Santana," she says not expecting to see me.

"I need to talk to you."

She turns to _what's his face_. Not that I care. "Can you give us a minute," she says. He nods and leaves off to the side thank god. Seeing me makes me cringe.

"So what's up?" Brittany asked. Was she serious! I thought it would be pretty clear what was up.

"Are you kidding me! You've been avoiding me these past two weeks and you ask me what's up?"

"I wasn't avoiding you. I haven't been in my room. Rachel told me you came by and I was meaning to get back to you but I've just been really busy." She's lying to my face! I can't believe it.

"Bullshit!" I snap, I'm not in the mood to be lied to. I want answers, straight answers.

"What! I told you, I haven't been in my room and..." I was not going to take her shit so I cut her off.

"I heard you!"

"What?" She asks a little more quietly.

"The last time I came by your room, I heard you in there. Rachel had no boy, that was you! After she closed to door on me, you thought I left but I hadn't and then I heard you two start talking," I said a little more calmly even if I was still boiling mad inside.

"Oh," is all she manages to say.

"Yeah, oh."

"Santana I'm sorry it's just..."

"Don't even try to give me an excuse. You kissed me and then you just avoid me! Do you know how that feels! Not to mention I see you here with a guy holding hands with him like you two have known each other forever." I was hurting now, I could feel it and I didn't like it. I can't feel, I won't let myself but my body doesn't seem to be listening.

"Ok."

"Ok what?" I snap.

"Ok I'll give you the whole story."

"Good, cause you at least owe that to me."

"Before the reunion I was at my dance studio where I ran into my friend Mike. He said he had this friend who wanted to go out on a date with me so we did. That's him over there," she points to the guy standing alone looking up at a tree. He looks like an idiot. "I didn't know what was really happening with him but he asked me out again after I got back from Lima, we went out again and I had a really good time."

"So you're dating him." I said trying not to sound as hurt as I was feeling.

"I...I," I knew the answer to that. I didn't need more then her stuttering.

"Forget it." I start to walk away but she grabs my wrist to stop me. I don't want to be stopped, I'm holding onto my tears and it's getting really hard to hold them in but I don't want to cry in front of her. I can't.

"Santana, you have to know that at the reunion, when we kissed. I felt nice."

"But that's all it is to you, nice. Just a big old nice mistake." I tell her very coldly, I'm back in bitch mode and I really could care less.

"No, it wasn't a mistake. I never said that."

"I can read between the lines."

"Obviously you can't because you're reading the wrong thing."

"Oh come on Brittany don't play games with me. I get it, you like him, you want to be with him. I get you don't like me and the kiss was just a kiss and because I know I will never get to be with you, please just let me go." She looks at me with sad eyes. I can't help but feel my stomach drop but I can't let those eyes get to me. She lets my arm go and I quickly pull it away.

"San I'm really sorry."

"Whatever," I scoff.

I turn and walk over to Quinn who saw the whole thing happen. I've never felt more betrayed. She looks back at Brittany giving her a cold look and then we walk off together, I don't even bother to look back. When I feel we're far away from Brittany I break out into tears. They fall, I can't stop them from falling. I hate feeling, I just wish it would all go away.

The tears come out of me and slid down my face. My whole body is shaking and I can barley stand, if it wasn't for Quinn hugging me I think I would have collapsed on the floor.

**Let me know what you guys think! Also in case this FF or any of my other ones get taken down cause of the FF removal thing that's happening, I will be post on my twitter where I'll upload the rest of the story/ stories. If you want you can follow me nayanewss . Also if you wanna feel free to give this story a shout out on tumblr. But seriously hope you enjoyed the chapter, I was having trouble with it. **


	6. I Don't Want To Dance

I come into my house, go up to me room and slam the door shut! I don't want anyone to disturb me at this point. Everything's stupid! I hate feelings. They can all go away, I don't need them. They are a waste of my precious time. As soon as I'm safe in my bed curled up under the covers I start to sob. The tears just flow out of me.

I hate this! I hate feeling like this. I haven't even known her for long and she already has this effect on me. I want it to disappear I want her to disappear. I'm so sick of the knot in my stomach and lump in my throat. It hurts too much, I can't stand the pain, I feel like my tears are blinding me. People see me as strong but inside I'm breaking. So much for being a rock. I feel my heart beat getting weak so I pull the covers up closer to my head. I must have gone through a million tissues by now, and there starting to make a mountain by my desk.

I wish I was her girl. I wish my smile was her favorite kind of smile and not that guy she was with. I wish I could hold her hand when she was upset and make her feel better and I wish that I was the last thing on her mind when she went to sleep and the first thing on her mind when she wakes up but I know that'll never happen.

I wish I could wake up to the sound of her breath on my neck, with the touch of her fingers on my skin holding me close, with her lips against my cheek, the feel of her heart beat beating with mine knowing that I could never find that feeling with anyone else but her. I feel lost, stupid knowing I'll never have her, I feel pathetic for wishing those things. I feel weak.

Now I am just lying in bed, lying in the dark with the pain inside me. I can't stop the tears but I wish for them to go away. I know it's not worth it to cry. It's not worth it to cry over something you never had. I don't want to be one of those people who cries for stupid things, I don't cry. Yet every time I try to fight the tears they come back like there's no end to them.

As I'm lying here thinking about all the thing that are going through my mind I feel myself being disrupted. I have finally managed to reduce the amount of tears flowing out of me but now I hear footsteps coming upstairs. I hate how they always have to check on me, I want to be alone. I don't want to talk to anyone, I'm just starting to pull myself together and I don't want to break down again when they come into my room.

Puck and Quinn always try to be there for me, I love them so much but this is not one of those times I want them to make me feel better. This is one of those Santana wants to be alone times. I hear the footsteps coming closer, who ever it is they are trying to be carful, to not be loud.

The footsteps come closer until they're right outside my door. Then, they stop. I look up from my bed to see the shadow that is outside, they're just standing there. Then after a few seconds they leave, that's the first time I smile since I've seen Brittany. I want her out of my head, I want to go back to how things used to be before I knew she existed. My eyes are getting heavy, all the crying has worn me out so slowly I decide to close my eyes and try to sleep. I curl up in my bed and let sleep over take me falling into a nice quiet slumber.

**Brittany's Point Of View **

I can't believe what happened today. I can't believe I was such an idiot. I hate myself for doing what I did, for saying what I said. It's all so frustrating. I come into my door room and slam the door shut, pissed of at myself. Rachel looks up at me in shock but I quickly give her one of those 'don't you dare ask me what's wrong' looks. She quickly backs off.

I fall down onto my bed and groan into my pillow. I can't believe I was such an idiot. I can't believe that I'm dating what's him name just because I'm too scared I'm going to get hurt if I date Santana. God I'm an idiot. This is all her fault making me feel all these things for her, if I didn't get hit with that stupid paint ball I'd never be in this mess and now I've not only hurt myself but I've also hurt her and that's the worst feeling in the world. My stomach crunches up and I feel like I have creepy crawlies running around inside of me.

Dave, that was his name. He was nice and we had a good time together but he never gave me those tingly feelings like Santana did when she was around and when he kissed me after our first date I never felt the fireworks like when I kissed Santana at the reunion. Kissing her was so fresh, so nice, her lips were so soft and caring and she made me feel like I was the specialist girl in the world. I just wanted to kiss her again, to hold her in my arms but what would happen if she realized I was the same girl she called a loser to back in high school, the same girl she used to throw slushies at. What if she wakes up and realizes she doesn't actually want to be with me.

I'm scared. I don't want to get hurt but I've never felt more alive then when I'm with her. Dave in nice, he listens to me and he gets what I try and say but he doesn't have the same spontaneous feeling like Santana does. Everything is so complicated and I hate it, I wish things would be simpler so I could understand them. I wish they could be as easy as understanding ducks. The way they swim in the water like they don't have a care in the world. I like that.

I slowly take my head off my pillow and look at Rachel who is sitting on her bed staring at me with sad eyes. I hate when she does that, how she looks at me like she feel sorry for me. I know she really wants to say something, she wants to get whatever is wrong with me out and talk about it.

She's really into other people's businesses. I know she's just trying to help but sometimes I wish that she would leave me alone and let me soak in my own misery. Then again when I talk with her all my confusion goes away and I understand things clearly.

I suppose I should talk to her, I've been lying on my bed for about half an hour thinking about everything running through my head, I'm sure it's killing her to know what goes on up here. I sigh, she's going to ask me anyway what's wrong so I might was well get it over with. I just don't know what I'm going to say, I've she knows that I liked Santana back in high school but she has no idea that I like her now. She has no idea Santana likes me. Heck I didn't know Santana liked me liked me until the reunion. I thought she was straight. I guess Rachel was right when she said Artie to me was like Santana to Puck back then.

I look back up at Rachel who is still staring at me, I guess she never really gets tired of that. I once saw her stare at a star forever because she thought it would help her stand out better on her audition for a play. I sit up and she smiles.

"Ready to talk now?" She asks me. I really don't want to talk but what other choice do I have.

"I guess." I say talking a deep breath.

"So, what's got you all down and sad?"

"I'm confused." I tell her, if she wants to know what's going on she's going to have to work hard to get it out of me. I sound like Santana now, afraid to admit my feelings.

"Confused? But you just went out a couple hours ago on your date and you were all happy and... oh this happened on your date didn't it?" She finally gets the hint after all this time. You would think that someone as smart as her who always has to be right would know it's about the date.

"I ran into Santana," that's all I had to say for her to understand me fully.

"What she say?"

"She was mad, she overheard our conversation the last time she came over to visit me. I felt so bad, so bad that I'm avoiding her. Everything's so screwed up."

"I don't understand why she's trying to hard to be your friend."

"I didn't tell you the whole story."

This got Rachel interested. She looked up at me confused and I knew I had to tell her about the night at the reunion, about our conversation the day she saw me with Dave and how she became jealous. So I did. I told her everything and I just watched Rachel's jaw drop, for once she was speechless. This was about the only time I wish this time she would talk because after a while it got really awkward and I really don't like awkward situations.

I could tell she was thinking. I had given her a lot of new information to process and knowing Rachel she has to be right about everything while includes her advice. If she doesn't give good advice first time round I feel like she'd break. I sat still on my bed thinking about all my problems.

"So you're scared that she might realize that she doesn't actually like you because she'll think your still a loser! Britt I really think you should stop bringing yourself down and realize that you're not a loser, you are very talented not as talent as me but you are talented. I can see you doing big things in the future. You are not a loser and she doesn't think that either." Rachel finally said.

"But I..." she cut me off.

"No, don't say that. Look, you don't know what will happen unless you go for it. Look at me, I didn't know I would make it into vocal performance here but I did. You don't know what will happen if you date Santana unless you give it a try."

"I don't want to get hurt."

"If she hurts you I'll kick her ass," I look at Rachel like she's crazy.

"Let's be realistic Rach, we all know you won't last five seconds against Santana. She's a tough one." I tell her, Rachel gives me _that_ look. She can't do it well though, she just looks really small.

"Moving on. I know you don't want to get hurt but look at you now. You're not hurt yet but you're not really living either. I've seen the fun, energetic Brittany and this is not her."

"I do like her. A lot. But now I'm the one that hurt her. You should have seen her face when I told her I was going to date Dave, she looked so broken, like a sad little puppy. She'll never forgive me now."

"Britt, she's been coming to our room for the past couple of weeks none stop trying to talk to you, she's obviously crazy about you. She might be hurt, but I'm sure if you explain what happened that she'll give you another chance. She'd have to be crazy not too," Rachel always knew what to say. She may be annoying sometimes but she gave great advice.

"I guess I could talk to her." My voice in small.

"That's the spirit! Now go get her!" Rachel was always so energetic; I wish sometimes there could be a switch that would turn her off like you could turn off those cute wined up toys.

"Now?" I ask in shock.

"Yeah! The sooner the better."

"What!"

"Yes go!"

"I can't go now! It's late and I don't even know her address so how am I supposed to talk to her, plus she's probably still angry at me and doesn't even want to see me and her friends all probably hate me and I don't know what to say and I haven't really thought about it that much and I..." Rachel finally cut me off and I could take a breath of air.

"You're rambling."

"Sorry." I say.

"Fine, since you don't know her address, tomorrow we'll find it, then we'll go for a drink in the evening and the day after that you will go talk to her. That will probably give you both enough time to cool down."

"I do like to drink, promise you'll have some then?" I know Rachel so I know she hardly drinks.

"Maybe."

"Pleeeasee!" I ask her.

"If I drink will you promise me you'll stop sulking and talk to her?"

"Yes! But you have to actually drink, not just the fruity drinks and we have to invite the others. I really want Tina and Mike to come too."

"Wasn't it Tina who told you not to go for Santana because of all the things she did to you in high school? What happens if she talks you out of it again? I don't want sad Brittany again. She is unpleasant."

I had forgotten the reason that I chose Dave was not only because he was the safe choice and I didn't want to get hurt but also because I had spoken to Tina a couple of nights before that on my phone asking her what I should do about my Santana situation. She had told me that I should forget about Santana because she made both our lives miserable in high school and doesn't deserve a second chance.

When we spoke I didn't tell her how I had, had a huge crush on Santana throughout most of my high school years despite all the things she did too me. When I had talked to Tina she told me that Santana was send from the devils soul to make all our lives a living hell and that she should no how heart break and being torn to pieces felt like. She told me that Santana didn't deserve me that someone like her doesn't change and she'll just end up hurting me again.

Everything Tina had told me I believed. That's why I went out with Dave, to forget about all my feelings. Tina had reminded me how vulnerable I was and how easily I could get hurt. She reminded me that Santana could still think of me as a loser and she just wants to continue hurting me but when I saw her face when she saw me with Dave it torn me to pieces. I hated myself for hurting her, no matter how much she hurt me back in high school. I hate seeing a sad Santana, even if she tries to hid it I know she's broken inside.

"No I know that Tina was wrong now, she won't convince me otherwise but she's my friend and I still want to go out and party with her and Mike."

"Are you sure?" Rachel asked me, she always wanted my choices to be really accurate. She hated when people picked one thing and then a few seconds later. That was one way to drive her insane.

"Yeah, lets go drinking, I want to get my mind off of everything and just go dancing. I won't even mention Santana." She looked at me in shock.

"Like that's going to be possible."

"It is!" I tried to sound convincing but the truth was I probably was going to mention her once or twice. "I don't want Tina to know just yet."

"If you're scared she's going to talk you out of..." I quickly cut her off, I did not want her to finish that sentience.

"No! I'm just, scared and confused okay, and telling her is going to make me more nervous and I don't even know what to say when I talk to her." I didn't want to start rambling on again so I made sure to cute myself off before that could happen. I wasn't ready for Tina to go, I know how she can be and if I told her she would make sure I didn't go talk to Santana whether I like it or not.

"Okay, we'll keep it a secret from her, but you know if you two do start dating your going to half to tell her. You know she's really good at figuring out secrets." That was true. Whenever you wanted to keep something from Tina or the rest of the world she always had a way of figuring out that you had a secret. She wouldn't find out what the secret was but she wouldn't stop looking until she did.

That's how she figured out I liked guys and girls. Apparently she thought I started acting weird and on edge, she knew there was something different about me and she made sure to figure out what it was. I couldn't let Tina figure it out.

. .

Tonight was going to be a night about having fun and getting my mind off of things... but seriously if I happen to think of the good things, like Santana and how we might be able to date on day down the road I would be okay with that. How could I stop thinking about her, it was almost impossible. There hasn't been a day that goes by that I haven't thought about her. Her smell, how soft her lips were on mine, how much she's changed since high school and has a caring nurturing side to her, she's just so perfect and I'm so happy she likes me.

All I want to be able to do is kiss her whenever I want, hold her and be with her. She's what I want and I don't care if im scared, Rachel's right I'm alive but I'm not really living without her. Tomorrow I was going to find her and tell her about the huge mistake I made. I'm going to get her back she'll be mine.

Right now I'm at the bar with my friends, Tina and Mike just arrived together and found Rachel and me sitting at the bar waiting to get drinks. I ordered the pink orangey drink because the colors are bright and pretty. Tina sits next to me but so far she's been making googly eyes with Mike the whole night. I can hear them talking but my minds somewhere else right now. My minds on Santana, wishing that she were here with me holding my hand.

All I can seem to think about is Santana, I told myself that I would try to not think about her but I seriously don't know what I was thinking. I look at Tina and see her lips moving, I think she's trying to talk to me but I'm not really listening.

"Huh?" I say.

"I asked you if you were going to hook up with anyone tonight? I think it would be good for you, all things considering," I knew what she was talking about. She was talking about Santana, she didn't want me to even give a thought about her, she was trying to get me to scoop up some guy. That's not what I wanted, that's not what would make me happy.

"I don't know, I'm not really feeling it tonight," how bad would it be if I just hooked up with someone and went to apologize to Santana tomorrow, that wouldn't work out too well? Hooking up, not going to happen.

"Yeah okay," I could tell she was disappointed. I don't care, I don't give into peer pressure.

The bartender gave me a shot, which disappeared very quickly and then another and then another. If I was going to get through this night then I would need as much achol as possible, it started out okay but with Tina's constant nagging trying to get me with a guy is really getting annoying.

Come to think of it, I don't think I ever told Tina that I was into girls. Yeah I had mentioned some were hot every now and then but I don't think she thought anything of it. I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm straight and right now I don't feel like telling her it would only get in the way. She would probably figure out why I called her to ask about Santana, scratch that... she would know that I want to date Santana.

I was always closer with Rachel then I was Tina, I felt like I never could have a decent conversation with Tina without getting judged or thinking she thought I was stupid. I know it's a silly thing to think but deep down I always felt that way I think that's why I went to Rachel, she made me feel good about myself and actually listened to me and she didn't even roll her eyes the first time I started talking about ducks.

I had just taken another shot when Tina's attention turned back onto me, but she wasn't alone this time and she wasn't with Mike. She had another guy with her.

"Britt this is Andrew. Mike told me you called it quits with Dave so I thought you might want to get back out there again," I looked over to Rachel for help, but she was busy talking to some other guy. He was in one of my classes, I think his name was Finn, or something like that. She would be no help.

"Tina I told you, I don't want to hook up with anyone."

"Oh you're just being stubborn, he's really nice once you get to know him."

"It's true I am," Andrew said. Great, he already sounded like an ass. All full of himself thinking he can get with anyone that he's like well it's not happening. Not with me anyway.

"I'm sure you are," I told him. "But like I said to my friend, I won't be hooking up with anyone tonight."

"Oh come on B, don't be such a loser," I sunk into my chair. The last time I was called a loser was in high school by Santana and her friends, Tina had never called me a loser before. I felt my face drop but I turned away from Tina, I didn't want her to know I felt this way.

Maybe if Tina thought I was a loser then I really was. She was one of the only people that never called me that and now here she was saying those things to my face. Maybe I didn't have a chance with Santana, maybe she would wake up and realize that Tina was right, that she was right when she was in high school, that I am a loser.

"I'm not feeling in the mood," I told her avoiding her gaze and keeping my voice soft.

"Come on, you have to get back out there, grab his hand and go dancing."

"Tina, just leave me alone!" I was starting to get really frustrated with her.

"Dance!"

"No!" I yelled and now a few people were looking at me. I shrank back into my seat. There was only one person I wanted to dance with and that was Santana but she wasn't here and she didn't like me.

"If you don't want to cause a scene then dance with him, I'm doing this for your own good Brittany." I could feel tears starting to form in my eyes, I didn't want to dance, I didn't want to dance with a random guy.

"Tina why are you pressuring me! You're supposed to be my friend," I snapped at her trying to hold back my tears.

"Maybe I should go..." Andrew said when Tina quickly turned around and grabbed his hand.

"No, she wants to dance with you she's just scared." She turned back to me. "Come on Brittany, you're a good dancer, you need to live a little. Date again, dance with him will you."

Just then I hear the doors slam open, I look up and don't believe who had just arrived at the bar. It's Santana, the only person that will ever be for me. I look back at Tina who looks frustrated, I block out her voice but I can tell she telling me to dance with him over and over again. I look away from her and resume staring at Santana. She's wearing a short blue dress, with silver heels and her hair is long flowing over her body, she looks so hot.

Tina snaps her fingers in front of my face bringing me back to reality and then turns to see what I was looking at. Her face slumps down with that _oh fuck _look. She's not happy Santana's here.

"If she comes over here I'm gonna raise hell," Tina snapped.

"Relax Tina, she just here minding her own business." I say, I don't want to get Santana involved with Tina.

"No, I won't relax. She's a bitch, she made our lives so miserable in high school, I don't want to sit here and just say nothing. As soon as she comes near me I'm giving her a piece of my mind," I look over to Rachel who is still talking with Finn, there in no way she's helping me out of this one. "And you know what, you've gotten me to switch the subject which in not fair so come on and dance with Andrew!"

She was now yelling at me. It was kind of scary; I had never seen this side of Tina before I had only seen the kind side, the caring side, I really don't like this side of hers. I look down in my seat trying to focus on something else, I don't want to dance and she's making the anger rise up inside me as well as the tears that are about to come out. I'm not an angry person, I don't like violence but she's making it real hard.

"Dance Brittany!"

"Tina stop it, I really don't want to. Please just respect me, I'm not in the mood tonight okay, just let it go," I say really fighting to hold my tears in.

"Brittany!" I looked over to Rachel who finally heard the commotion and was now coming over. Thank god for Rachel. She didn't look to happy coming over which tells me she was on my side. "Tina, why are you shouting at Brittany?"

"She doesn't want to dance with this lovely guy I found for her." Tina says pointing to Andrew who just waved. Rachel looks at Tina unamuzed.

"If she doesn't want to dance then leave her alone. She obviously has a reason for not wanting to dance so just accept that." Rachel always had my back. Thank god for her, she really knew how to cheer me up. Yes I still felt like I was going to break down and cry at any moment but at least I had a friend now.

"Why are you on her side! She needs to get out. She's being a loser..." Rachel quickly cut her off.

"Don't you dare call her that!" Many people were now staring at us, I looked over at Santana but she wasn't one of the many staring. I didn't want her to see this fight anyway. "She is not a loser!"

"Geeze I didn't actually mean she was a loser, learn to take things less serious."

"Tina you're being really mean right now," I tell her.

"Oh Britt, just develop a back bone."

"Shut up Tina!" Rachel snapped.

"You no it's true, she always was a pushover, why do you think Santana always bullied her, she couldn't stand up for herself. At least I can now," that was it, the last thing I could hear before bursting out into tears. They just came out, I couldn't hold them back anymore.

I got off the bar stool but with the amount of drinks I had caused me to fall on the floor, I felt my head spinning and it looked like there were little stars flying around me. I was really drunk, I felt more tears falling from my eyes. Then I felt someone arms around me trying to help me up but I pushed them away, I didn't want anyone's help. I just wanted to be left alone. I looked around me once I had stood up again and noticed everyone was staring. I felt like I was back in high school again, like a scared, hurt little girl.

I ran away as fast as I could, I heard Rachel calling for me as I ran but there was no way I was going to stay in this situation anymore. My day had gone from bad to worse. This was horrible, I was so drunk I couldn't even see the way out of the bar, I stopped for a second to look for it but once I had stopped I noticed more people staring which was not okay with me so I started running again, I started running until I tripped over my heels and fell into someone landing right on the floor.

"Sorry, I'm so sorry," I said in a small voice, unable to look at the person I bumped into due to the tears that were blinding me and the alcohol that was clouding my eyesight. I tried to get up, I struggled but I only ended up falling back down again. This was so humiliating I could feel the person's eyes staring right at me.

I tried to get up, so I crawled on my hands and knees, it wasn't working that well. More tears entered my eyes and as I tried to get up but this time I felt hands wrap around my waist lifting me up so I was back up on my feet. I looked at the ground for a minute feeling to embarrassed to look up.

"Thank you," I mumbled.

"No problems," I felt myself freaking out, that voice sounded familiar, too familiar. I looked up and it was the person that I thought it would be which made this situation a whole lot worse. It was Santana. She was staring at me, she didn't look mad but I knew she was probably pissed inside. I couldn't stand around to face her now.

"Sorry," I said again, the tears pouring out. I started to walk off towards the door fumbling and tripped over my feet. This really wasn't working out the way I thought tonight would. As I stumbled to the door I felt an arm wrap around me, stabilizing me. I looked behind me and realized it was Santana. I didn't understand why she was helping me, after everything I did to her I didn't understand why she wanted to help me.

I hear more footsteps behind me and then I hear the voice... Tina. "You get away from her! She doesn't need your help," I realize she was talking to Santana.

"Don't even start with me. Don't think I didn't hear your little argument from across the bar, some friend you are. You leave Brittany alone," Santana snapped, I was thankful for that. She was like my hero, but I knew she was probably still mad at me deep down inside.

"You've been a bitch to her all your life."

"You're being a bitch right now," Santana snapped back. I let a little giggle slip out.

"Get away from her, I'll take care of her." Tina said back.

"No. You've done enough, back off," Santana said and I felt her grip become tighter around me. It made my stomach flutter, I loved the feeling when she held me close. She was defending me, after everything I'd done to her she was still standing here defending me.

"I haven't even..." I cut her off.

"Tina leave." The look on Tina's face at this moment was priceless. Her mouth had dropped open and I could tell she was fuming inside, she was my friend but right now I couldn't handle her. I needed Santana. I heard Santana laughing at Tina's reaction. Hearing her laugh being all happy made me smile.

"Whatever." I heard Tina scoff as she left. Then Santana helped me out the door to the side of the bar. My tears never stopped during the scene in the bar. They just kept falling out, I didn't even realize they were still running down my cheek until I felt Santana's thumb gently brush away my tears.

She looked so innocent standing there helping me. She looked me in the eyes, into my sad eyes, I couldn't look her in the eyes after what I did. I felt horrible inside, this was not something I wanted to deal with tonight. I had it all planned out, everything was ready for tomorrow and now this had to happen.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I asked her, she seemed a little surprised by my question.

"Because I care about you Britt, no matter what happens or who you date, I'll always care about you," my heart instantly warmed up and a smile spread across my face. "Now are you alright? I heard you fight with Tina, I'm really sorry she pressured you."

"It's alright."

"It's not though Britt, she's your friend she shouldn't do that to you. You deserve so much better." I could see the worry in her eyes, I could tell she cared which only made me feel more comfortable around her.

"I can't believe you. After everything I did? After I screwed up so badly? I don't know how you could..." she cut me off.

"Britt, you can't get rid of me that easily."

"But I hurt you, I didn't mean to but I did. I'm such an idiot, such a loser I understand why you bullied..." Santana quickly cut me off."

"Don't you dare finish that sentence. You're not a loser, you never were. You didn't get slushied because you were a loser okay, if you knew the whole story then..."

"Then tell it too me."

**Exams are done! Updates will be quicker! Yey! Also yeah I left you with a cliffhanger. I wonder what the story will be... Hope you enjoyed it, let me know what you think. **


	7. That's The Truth

**Santana's Point of View**

I was standing outside the bar with Brittany, I was still upset at her for everything that happened. I was hurt that she was starting to date that other guy after we had kissed but that didn't mean I didn't care for her. I saw what was going on between her and Tina and I knew I had to help her, I couldn't stand the thought of her being sad. When she ran into me and looked up she looked so helpless and lost it broke my heart.

Then again when I saw her trying to make her way out of the bar, I needed to help her stumbling self and when Tina came after her I just snapped no one was going to hurt Brit. She was drunk now confessing that she had screwed up, that she was sorry, although it felt good to hear that I still was really hurt. How was I supposed to know that after tonight she wouldn't just go back to the guy she was so keen on dating. I wanted to say mad at her but I just couldn't.

She shouldn't call herself a loser, she's far from that and Tina, fucking Tina how dare she call Brittany a loser and stupid! She's not! She's an amazing person that shines brighter than the stars. I really screwed up when I bullied Brittany back in high school, I guess it's finally time to tell her why I did that.

"You want to know the whole story?" Brittany just nodded. "Can we go somewhere a little more privet? I really don't feel like telling it outside a bar."

"Of course!" She said a little too overjoyed. I wondered how much of this she would actually remember tomorrow morning she was really drunk. Not only did I want to get her somewhere that I could speak to her privately but I also wanted to help sober her up, get her to drink some water and eat something.

I helped Brittany to the side of the street where I flagged a cab down. Rachel already saw us leaving together when Tina came to give us her bitch talk so I knew I didn't have to go find her friends and tell her she was coming with me. I didn't think it was a good idea for Brittany to be hanging around Tina anyway, not after the way she treated her.

I helped Brittany into the cab and she thanked me for helping her. The cab ride was quiet but not that awkward silence it was comfortable silence. Brittany was getting tired, I could see her yawning and her eyes slowly started to close, she looked so cute when she struggled to stay awake I wish I could scoop her up in my arms and cuddle with her. She yawned again and then looked at me, her eyes were really heavy but the blue shone though light up her whole face.

"You can close your eyes for a bit, I'll wake you up once we get there," She smiled and then rest her head on my shoulder. Her touch felt so nice, even if it was only a little bit of her on me I didn't want her to move. I rested my hand on her thigh because I really didn't have anywhere else to put it, it felt strange, I didn't know if she wanted me to rest it there seeing she was dating someone but she didn't push me away so I kept it there.

Slowly I felt her breathing become lighter as she drifted off to sleep. She looked breathtakingly beautiful peaceful like nothing bad had happened to her in the last hour. As the car ride went on I felt her curling up to my side and that's when she rested her arm around my waste holding onto me tight. I felt my heart jump, I'm pretty sure the smile on my face was as big as it had even been. She made me feel so good inside I could not feel any happier then in this moment.

I saw we were slowly approaching my apartment so I thought it would be a good time to wake Brittany up. I really didn't want to disturb her sleeping but I knew if she didn't have water she would be feeling horrible in the morning. I also knew that if I didn't tell her the story tonight I probably never would I probably would lose all the courage I had.

"Britt wake up," I said to her gently. She just groaned and readjusted herself, could she be any cuter. "Britt we're here, you gotta get up, we need to get you some water."

"I don't wanna," she sounded like a little four year old, and her pout was too cute. If she kept doing that I wouldn't be able to stay mad at her for much longer.

"Please, for me?" She looked up at me and rubbed her eyes.

"Fine," she said in a playful voice. I paid the cab driver and help her out of the door and up the stairs to my apartment. I sat her down on the couch and got her some water. I could tell that her little sleep in the cab sobered her up a little, she was more alert. Now she was going to remember the story for sure, I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. I was never really good with feelings, or expressing myself.

"Thanks," she told me taking a sip of the water.

"Yeah, no problem," now I felt awkward. I hated awkward situations they were so uncomfortable. I knew I was going to have to tell her the story, make her believe she wasn't a loser and the only way to do that was to open myself up to her, show her my feelings, something I was terrified of doing.

I sat beside her on the couch and I saw that she was staring at me with those gorgeous blue eyes, she looked so sweet, innocent, she just made my life turn out for the better. I suddenly realized her blue eyes were starting to water like she was about to cry I just broke inside.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I asked, trying to comfort her.

"San I'm so sorry! I ruined everything! I screwed up so badly. Everyone's right, I am a loser, you had it right in the first place okay so please let me go home. Everyone was right," she was crying, so looked so broken which made me break. I was not going to let her think this.

"Stop it! I already told you you're not a loser; you're so much more than that. I didn't bully you because I thought you were a loser and if you stop crying for one second I will explain everything too you okay?" I didn't want to raise my voice but I hated when she talked bad about herself. She was the strongest person I knew.

Brittany nodded. I moved so that I was holding her waste, she then adjusted herself so her head was lying on my stomach. I held her never wanting to let her go, I was so comfortable I never wanted this feeling to go away.

"You know I was really popular at school, I was the leader the top bitch. No one would give me crap. When you first entered high school, that was the year I started to figure out that I was into girls. I didn't want anyone to know, I knew if they found out they would give me all this crap and I would go from the top to the bottom and I couldn't handle that. I didn't know how to deal with it."

"San," she interrupted me. Her voice was soft and calming, I could tell she knew I knew that it was hard to say this out loud. I don't know why it was so hard, I guess it had to do with the fact that I treated her horribly.

"No please, I have to say this," she nodded. "I heard that people were getting suspicious so I went to Puck for help, he was the only one that knew back then. He was my best friend, I knew I could trust him with anything. So then he came up with idea that I should date him. We wouldn't actually do stuff, he was just there so people would stop suspecting me." I looked at Brittany, her eyes were soft and I knew she understood.

Now I would have to get to the hard part. "When I saw you for the first time, you looked so innocent, so beautiful, I hadn't spoken to you yet but for some reason you were always on my mind. I liked you Brittany, I liked you so much," she looked at me surprised. I could tell she wasn't expecting that.

"You liked...?" She stopped her sentence; I could tell she was really confused.

"I liked you but... I was scared. I knew that if I acted on my feelings, people would get suspicious again and I didn't want people to talk about me or hurt me so instead of nice to you I was the exact opposite. I called you a loser so everyone thought I hated you and so no one would suspect I was actually crazy about you." Her face was now in a big O and I could feel my eyes start to water. I felt terrible for everything I did. What was I thinking?

"I threw slushy's at you to try and make the feelings go away. I did whatever I could to... to get you to hate me so I wouldn't have to look at your sweet face anymore. I wanted to see the hate in your eyes, the hate you had for me," I could feel the tears coming out of my eyes. I hated this part. "So that, it would push you away. So that I would never have to talk to you, so that all the feelings I had would go away but they didn't."

Brittany lifted my head up and whipped away my tears gently with her thump. She just smiled. "You didn't do a very good job then, did you?" Now it was my turn to be confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Santana I told you already. Even though you did that. After everything I still liked you so much. I don't know why, I know I shouldn't have after everything you did but there was just something about you," that made my heart flutter.

"Brittany you need to know I never though you were a loser or were stupid or anything. I thought you were the most amazing person in the whole world. I was the stupid one, the stupid one because I couldn't even fess up to my feelings and I made you life hell because of that. I'm so sorry."

"I believe you, and I do forgive you," hearing that made my body relax I just couldn't stand the thought of Brittany being mad at me. It was to horrible and it made my stomach turn. "And Santana, your not stupid either okay. You were scared, everyone has the right to be scared."

"Yeah but..."

"No, you were scared. No buts. I get it, and I forgive you."

"Thanks Britt," she leaned into me and gave me a hug, it didn't last long but in those 3 seconds I felt my whole world turn upside down for the better. I felt the spark, her touch alone gave me the giddy feeling inside to make my day for the whole week.

"Britt, I don't want to lose you again, and I know that you don't want to date me at the moment and I respect that so I really hope that if you want to, you'll let me be your friend?"

"San of course I'll let you be my friend but..."

"No please, no more buts, I can't handle that right now. And please can we not talk about things between us, I really can't handle that either, I just, I feel like I need to be alone for a little. To clear my head. I want to stay friends and I know I'll have to accept the fact that you'll date other people so please can I just be alone for a little, I called Rachel before and I think she's waiting outside."

Brittany started walking to the door, I really didn't want to see her leave but just the fact that I knew I couldn't have her was driving me insane. Here I just poured all my feelings out to her and I knew that she didn't want me back. I needed her in my life that was for sure but right now, I needed to process everything I said. Everything that was happening too fast.

"San please."

"I'll call you tomorrow okay? Please I just need to be by myself for now."

"So you just tell me this story that explains to me why you treated me like crap back in high school and now you're telling me to go before you let me ask any question or tell you my feelings? Is that how it's gonna work?" I couldn't stare at her face, it was so painful and I've been through an experience that was a lot like this. I didn't want to relive that.

"Please go."

"Well fine!" She said slamming the door shut. I felt the tears run out of my eyes, once again I was alone. The last time I was in this situation was with my old girlfriend. I had just told her all my feelings, I had told her I loved her and she told me that she could never love me. That she was incapable of loving me and that I messed up her chances of being with a guy. She told me that it was my fault for making her date me and that she didn't know how I got her to agree to date me in the first place. She broke my heart that night, and I couldn't take the chance that Brittany would do the same thing to me. Yet again Santana Lopez was scared, so much for being a rock.

**Brittany's Point of View**

I was hurt that Santana just shoved me out of her apartment, hurt that I didn't get the chance to tell her that I liked her, that I wanted her but I guess I needed to give her time, I guess she didn't want me that much if she wouldn't even listen to me confess my feelings to her. Santana wanted to stay friends, and I would just have to accept that.

She was right, Rachel was waiting for me outside I put on a brave face for her, there was no way I wanted to talk to her at the moment. I told myself to think of happy things like ducks or Lord Tubbington. He was my favorite I really missed me. Maybe I could sneak him in my door room some how. No that wouldn't work, too bad. I got into the car and turned my face away from Rachel, I hoped she would understand. I was not completely sober again and I hated it. I wish this conversation took place before I got drunk in the first place so I could go to the bar and forget everything.

Thankfully Rachel didn't ask me anything the whole car ride back, maybe she could tell I didn't want to speak to her. I had a ruff night; first with Tina and then with Santana so by the time I got home I just curled up in my bed and tried to fall asleep. It was harder then I suspected, Santana was on my mind constantly. I couldn't stop thinking about her kicking me out of her apartment that moment just felt so surreal.

I woke up the next morning with only a little headache, I had Santana to thank for that. Without the water it would probably have been much worse, thank god she sobered me up. I also thought about what I said to her last night, I know I over reacted on my part as well as hers. I just had so many thoughts after everything she told me , it made me need to express myself. When she didn't let me I kind of lost it. I never lose it.

I planned to go to the park today, too see the ducks and get my mind off of everything. I lay in bed thinking of everything that happened to me the night before, I also noticed that Rachel wasn't in her bed, she probably went to shower or went to one of those early morning vocal lessons of her. Thank go she didn't wake me up, I remember at the beginning of the year she would always wake me up because she told me that early rising would be good for my voice. I don't even sing, what was she thinking?

The clock read 11:42am, the means I had to get ready for class, which was about an hour from now. I had my dance critic in a couple of weeks and I really wanted to do well. I was almost at the top of my class other then this girl Missy who really bugged me but I tried not to let her bring me down. She just thought she was better then everyone else and I dislike those types of people, not hate never hate. Hate it a really strong word.

Just then I heard my phone buzz, I need to find it I always lose that thing. I get out of bed and start to look around the room, ugh I really hate when I lose it. Rachel told me I should put one of those phone trackers on it but I told her that I might just lose the tracker as well. I looked around a little more and find it in my ducky slipper; I don't know how it got in there.

My face instantly lights up.

**Santana: Hey, sorry about last night. I didn't handle it really well but I meant what I said I want to be friends so can we hang out today?**

She wanted to hang out! Okay I would rather go on a date with her but this is the next best thing.

**Brittany: I'm sorry too! And yes we can hang out, I have class at 12:30 after that?**

She instantly replied.

**Santana: Of course! I need to by my cousin a bday present, come with? We'll do something better after :-)**

**Brittany: Awww cute! :D I'd love too! 3pm meet? **

**Santana: Perfect! Can't wait! **

**Brittany: Me either! **

I couldn't wait! In just a couple of hours I would be hanging out with Santana, I really shouldn't tell Tina thought, I know exactly what she'd say and I wasn't about to let her try and stop me. These were going to be the longest hours of my life.

**Santana's Point Of View**

I realized that I over reacted a little last night, if Brittany would have told me the story I told her last night I would wanted to say something about it but I didn't let her, she had every right to be angry I just hope that when I see her she'll be able to forgive me. She didn't seem mad in her texts but they never show true emotion.

Truthly I was excited to see Brittany, to talk to her and just have her in my life. I was on my way to meet her right now, she text me a couple of minutes ago telling me where her class was; I was going to pick her up. I made sure to wear something nice, causal nice, something that would stand out and get Brittany to notice me. I decided on a red top that squeezed me in all the right places and short shorts. I was ready for this.

I saw her waiting for me when I arrived, _Oh shit was I late, _I thought. I rushed over towards her feelings bad inside, I didn't want to keep her waiting. She smiled and waved once she saw me, that made me feel a little better.

"Were you waiting long?"

"Yes, half an hour," my face dropped, I felt so bad. "San I'm kidding, class just ended like 2 minutes ago."

"That wasn't funny," I told her.

"Yeah it was, you should have seen you face," she right my face probably looked really funny but I just couldn't stand the thought of making Brittany wait.

"Whatever, you ready to go?"

"Of course."

"My cars just in the parking lot, we can take it too the store and then go to the park," I told her.

The car ride wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be, it was actually nice. We had decent conversations, she told me about home and how she wanted to be a dancer when she grew up and maybe end up choreography some Broadway shows and I told her my dreams, she was one of the first people to actually pay full attention and seemed interested in them, it was nice.

We got to the store in good time once she realized that we were going to a kids toy store her eyes just light up like a small child on Christmas morning, it was the cutest thing. We bounced through the doors and took a look at all the toys, some people were shooting her weird looks but I made sure to give them my death look back. I was going to protect Brittany whether I was in a relationship with her or not, I cared about her and I didn't want her to get hurt.

That's when she saw the trampoline section; she looked back at me with excited eyes. I couldn't help but smile at her she looked too adorable.

"San can we go take a look! Please? I love trampolines, there so bouncy," she looked at me with pleading eyes, how could I say not to that.

"Sure Britt," I said as she grabbed my arm and pulled me into the section. My heart felt like it was banging against my ribcage, and I think I forgot to breathe for a second. I looked at Brittany and saw her smiling at me, that was enough to calm me down, I really hoped she hadn't heart how fast my heart was beating I felt like it was almost impossible for no one to hear it.

"Do you think that I can go on one? Do you think that would be aloud?" She asked anxious to get on one.

"I'm sure they wouldn't mind and if they try to calm any trouble I'll be hear for you, you don't have to worry," if Brittany wanted to bounce I was going to let her. I wanted to make sure she had a good time with me.

"You're the best," she told me and I felt myself starting to blush.

Brittany then climbed up onto one of the trampolines and started bouncing around, I couldn't help but laugh, the excitement in her was so cute! It's like she could take any situation and make the best of everything. I watched her bounce up and down with the biggest grin I'd ever seen.

"Omg this is so much fun San!" She told me bouncing up and down; up and down it was hard for me to keep up. I had trouble watching her.

Suddenly she stopped bouncing for a second and looked at me, I looked back at her with a questioning look on my face. She bounced off the trampoline and landed right in front of me I jumped up a little, that surprised me.

"Will you bounce with me?" She asked, I looked around to see people looking at her bouncing, they most of them didn't seem to care too much but others gave her that weird look again which made me feel a little uncomfortable.

"Um, I don't know. I really would rather just stay on the ground, but you can keep going," she pouted which made my stomach sink, I hated how she had this effect on me. Santana Lope never gave into anyone, well until Brittany came along. She just made everything seem better.

"Pleaseeee!" She begged. I looked around at all the people again who had focused their attention on something other then us. I knew that once we started bouncing again they would look but all I wanted to do was make Brittany happy.

"You know what, I'll do it," I say getting up on the trampoline.

We started bouncing again and to my surprise it was actually really fun. I didn't think it was possible but Brittany's grin got even bigger and I couldn't help think of the fact that it had something to do with me. It started to blush again. I turned my attention off of Brittany for once second to regain my balance, I felt bare on the side next to me so I turned to Brittany only to realize she was bouncing from one trampoline to another.

"What are you doing?" I called after her.

"It's really fun! You should try it."

"You're going to get us kicked out," she didn't listen to me she just kept bouncing from one trampoline to another.

"You need to relax a little, it's fun," she looked at me I was really tense. It wasn't the fact I was worried about getting kicked out I was worried that she could fall and hurt herself.

"You could get hurt," I told her but she just smiled at me.

"Are you worried about me?" She said in a playfully voice. She looked at the worry in my eyes and then jumped off the trampoline to come stand next to me. "Okay, I'll stop, for you." She nudged me, was she flirting with me! I got tingles all up my arm.

"So what are you going to get your cousin?" She asked.

"I was thinking a stuffed animal or something, I'm not really sure. I'm not that good with picking out toys." I told her.

"Well it's a good thing you brought me, I'm the toy expert." She said looking quite proud of herself. I could tell she really knew her stuff.

"Are you?" I asked her.

"Yes, you stick with me and you'll have the best present ever for your cousin, now does she have a favorite animal or anything?" She asked.

"Um yeah, I think she really likes Pigs last time I checked," Brittany's eyes light up with happiness and if she was happy then so was I.

"Well then follow me," she grabbed my arm again and started dragging me to another part of the store, once again I got the tingles in my arm and my heart started to beat faster. I felt like my heart was exploding with happy fireworks, her blonde hair dangled over her shoulders and I knew that this was one of those perfect moments.

She brought me towards the stuffed animal section and to my amazement there were a lot of them. I never really go shopping in toys stores so this was quite a surprise for me, they had like every single animal you could think of. Brittany brought me over towards the Pig section of stuffed animals.

"Now just pick out the one you like, personally my favorites the one with the little scrunched up noise and it's no cute," she told me, she was right it was pretty cute.

"Then I'll take it, I'm sure if you like it then so will my cousin. I trust your judgment." I told her.

Brittany's eyes got wide and I could tell she was looking right past me at something else. I turned to look at whatever she was looking at. She ran towards another stuffed animal and grabbed hold of it. It was a duck, they was she held it and cuddled up to it was too adorable.

"Look at it San, isn't it so cute! Can I get it?" She asked me.

"Of course you can. You can get whatever you want," She jumped up and down and then tackled me into a big hug. This was my favorite thing, just to be inside her arms where I know its safe and warm. I wish I could be in her arms forever where she would just hold me tight and never let me go.

"This is the greatest! It's so cute, don't you think it's the cutest?" She asked me. I was about to answer when I heard someone scoff at her. I looked to see a man staring at her shaking his head. This was not okay with me.

"And what are you scoffing at?" I asked him angrily, he is not aloud to treat Brittany like that.

"Comes on, she's a little old to be loving a stuffed animal, she's not two anymore, its kind of pathetic," I looked over at Brittany who looked like she could break. I turned back to the man and got right up in his face.

"No you listen here. Brittany can do whatever the fuck she wants got that, it doesn't matter how old she is, if something makes her happy then that's all that matters and she doesn't need old men like you how've lost their inner child to tell her what she can and can't do, so hears how it's gonna work, you're going to apologize to my girl Britt right now before I go all lima heights on your ass and trust me buddy you do not want that." I made sure to make my point clear.

"You're not serious," was this guy joking. I looked him straight in the eye.

"I don't kid," I said as serious as possible, his expression changed from tough to kind of worried. He looked at me and realized that I wouldn't back down. Then her turned to Brittany.

"Sorry," he said before running off.

"Pathetic," I said under my breath. I turned back to Brittany who was once again smiling, thank god, I hated seeing her sad.

"So, I'm your girl," my eyes widened and I began so embarrassed, I hadn't realized I said that. I could feel my cheeks turning hot and my hands were getting sweaty.

"Uh, I... I was just kidding you know, um, to make a good speech," I told her.

"But I thought you don't kid?" She asked me again, great I really should watch what I say from now on.

"Don't use what I said to him against me," I said jokily. She couldn't help but smile.

"Well I thought you looked really tough, like my personal superhero," and once again I was blushing.

. .

A few hours later I was still with Brittany we had decided to go to the pond and watch the ducks along with her new stuffed duck I ended up buying for her. She wanted to pay for it but I insisted seeing I dragged her with me in the first place, she knew she would eventually she would end up losing the fight again me so she let me.

I watched the ducks swim in the water, they were so graceful and free, they didn't have a care in the world lucky little creatures. Brittany sat on the ground watching the ducks very closely, I sat down next to her and smiled because I couldn't believe she was this into ducks but that just made her Brittany and I didn't want her to be anyone else but herself.

"Can we feed the ducks?" Brittany asked me still keeping her focus on the ducks.

"I don't have anything with me," I felt bad for not having anything, I hated disappointing her.

"That's alright, I have some bread in my bag," she said reaching inside her bag and pulling out two slices of bread handing me one of them. I took it willingly; she then ripped it up and started feeding them. All at once they rushed towards her.

"Uh Britt, why do you have bread in your bag?" I asked very curious.

"Incase I get hungry. Like what if I'm just waking down the street and get hungry, what if there's no food store near me. I don't want to starve," she continues to amaze me.

"I guess you're right," I said with a laugh. "Come to think of it, I am a little hungry."

"I got you covered," Brittany told me as she pulled out an apple, some crackers and a packet of cookies and handed them to me. She then continued to dig in her bag and pulled out a carrot for herself. I looked at her strangely.

"What else do you have in there?" She practically had a whole fridge in there.

"Not much, just some chocolate bars and some blueberry's." She said.

"You have a feast in there." I said.

"Yeah well I have it in case of emergencies and well you were hungry so technically it counts as an emergency," how could I not like her, she was so adorable.

"Thanks Brit-Brit," I said.

This moment felt perfect, being here with her felt like all my problems had disappeared. I knew that I would have to get over her some time because I knew that it would hurt too much knowing I couldn't have her but for now I enjoyed the feeling, I enjoyed spending time with her.

**Sorry it took a little long for this chapter, I had a little bit of writers block. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think! **


	8. Slowly Moving

It was just another day, I woke up, I studied a little and now I was sitting on the beach tanning while Puck was in the water with Quinn, both trying to act like they're _just _friends. They're obviously crazy about each other, I don't see why they won't buck up and ask the other out. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only mature one around here, I mean if you like someone you should tell them... okay maybe I should be taking my own advice. I haven't even talked to Brittany since we went out to get my cousin a present.

We ended on pretty good terms although I can't help feeling like she was still mad at me, that she was still mad at me for what happened the night before we hung out. We hadn't really talked about that night and I feel like I hurt her, that was the last thing I wanted to do. She hasn't even texted me since then. Maybe we aren't meant to be friends.

Pushing that thought out of my head I went back to my tanning and focused on my music from my iPod, which never failed to cheer me up. My music was like my escape, I guess that's why I was minoring in it, I wanted to major in it but my parents wouldn't let me. They told me that I should have a back up in case my music doesn't turn out. My music was a way into my soul, it was a huge part of me but I hadn't really found anyone to share it with other then Puck or Quinn. My mum and dad were never were that interested in it.

I saw Puck coming over towards me leaving Quinn in the ocean by herself, he was probably going to ask me something like "does this mean she likes me" or something like that like he usually does. I looked over at Quinn who pretended she didn't mind that he left her but I could tell otherwise.

"What's up Puckster?" I asked him, he hated when I called him that.

"Shut it Lezpez," he told me, if he didn't have a good reason for coming over here he was totally going to get it.

"What do you want?" I asked him, he was disrupting my precious tan time.

"Tonight. Me, you, Quinn and the rest of the gang are going to Rush to get our drink on, you best be coming," he told me. Rush was one of the best bars near campus. A lot of students went there when they wanted to get a good drink, they was famous for there mystery drinks. No one knew what they had in them but damn they were good.

I hadn't really been out that much so I guess it was about time I went out and partied. Besides I had to keep my eyes on Puck and Quinn to make sure they don't do anything stupid because when they get drunk they start doing crazy shit. It is my duty as their best friend to stop them from making fools of themselves even if they sometimes let me get carried away.

"Yeah sure, it should be fun," I told Puck who did one of his lame fist pumps, I just rolled my eyes.

"Great! Maybe you want to invite Brittany? It could be a good excuse to talk to her?" I knew exactly what he meant, I wanted to text Brittany these last couple of days but to be honest I was scared. I really don't know why, she said we were friends, I could text friends but I just didn't want to be one of those random people that are like 'hey, how's it going. I wanted to talk to you but I have no idea what to say so I'm just going to say hey.'

"I don't know if she'll want to come," I said.

"Stop being such a wimp and text her, you don't know what she's going to say until you ask her," he was right, gosh I hate it when he's right. It means I have to give him the satisfaction of knowing I was wrong or worse I actually have to thank him.

"Aren't you going to thank me?" There is it, he's always looking for my gratitude towards him. He knows it really bugs me when he's right so he tried to milk it every single time.

"No thanks," I tell him giving him one of my sarcastic smiles.

"Whatever, don't expect me to give you advice anymore," he tells me.

"Please like you ever give me good advice," I joke and he gives me a gentle shove, so I give him a playful slap on the shoulder, he winces but he was totally asking for that. No one pushes Santana Lopez around, I'm a stand up girl!

"And for the record, I give you better advice then you could ever gives me," he says with a wink.

"I don't believe that for a second. You just choose not to follow my advice because you don't have the balls to tell her your true feelings," He knows it's true.

"Whatever Satan, I'm going back to swimming now," he says starting to walk away.

"Finally some peace and quiet!" I call after him, which results in him flipping me off as he walks back to the water and Quinn giving her a wave. I can only laugh, they are so in love even if they choose not to show it.

He's right though, I should talk to Brittany, the worst that could happen is she would say no. I pull out my phone and begin to text her before I chicken out again. I stare at her name for a few seconds, if she really wanted to hear from me should we have texted me but I really want to see her I should text her. I hate having these internal battles with myself. I press send before I can change my mind.

**Santana: Hey Britt, do u wanna come with me and the gang to Rush 2night? **

Short and simple, I hoped that was good enough. I though of apologizing for not texting her earlier but I didn't want it to turn out into an eight page essay. I decided I'd just wait and see what she'd have to see.

I put my iPod back in and started to listen to my music, I watched as Puck picked Quinn up and started twirling her around over the water, watching the two of them together amused me. I thought I might try to embarrassed them, it might get interesting and I needed a distraction while waiting for Brittany's reply.

"Get a room you two!" I shout down at them, Puck quickly drops Quinn in the water he looked embarrassed, exactly what I was going for. I could stop laughing, that was the best reaction I could ever hope for! Quinn had gone under the water and now had come up still in shock from being dropped. She hit Puck in the arm. Score for Lopez.

"You ass! Why'd you drop me?" She told him.

"Sorry, I was startled," he answered; oh gosh this was just too fun to watch.

They went on like that for a couple of minutes, arguing which then turned into splashing each other until they were hugging again. They make up quick, it was cute but I was never going to tell them that I thought they were cute together. If I told them I thought they were cute I would never hear the end of it.

I looked back at my phone but still no text from Brittany, maybe she was ignoring me. I hated waiting for people to text me back. Just when I was about to go back inside I heard my phone buzz. I quickly picked it up and search for my messages. There it was, the text message from Brittany.

**Brittany: Tonight? Oh sure, I think I can make it. **

She didn't seem to thrilled, she sounded like she was going because she had nothing better to do with her night, that stung. Still I was going to see her and that counted for something.

**Santana: Great! We're leaving at 8, do you need me to pick you up? :)**

I hoped she would say yes, it gives me more time to spend time with her.

**Brittany: No that's okay, I can find my own way. Do you mind if I join u at 9, I have 2 take care of something?**

Shit, I have to wait an extra hour to see her.

**Santana: Yeah that fine, is everything okay?**

She had to take care of something, I hope it wasn't anything bad, I hope she's okay. I was probably just jumping to conclusions but I did want to know if she was alright.

**Brittany: Yeah fine, just need to figure something out. **

**Santana: Ok! See you soon! :)**

**Brittany: Yeah, see you. **

No exclamation point, no smiley face, something was defiantly wrong and I could help but feel that it had something to do with me. I bet she didn't even want to come out tonight and that's why she's acting all funny. I decided to not let that get me down, I was going to dress extra hot tonight and give Brittany a good reason for coming out. I was going to get her drooling all over me whether she likes it or not.

I would wear something really good and try and get Brittany to have a good time with me, maybe if I'm lucky get her to like me more than a friend. I know she feels something; I just some how have to get her to access that feeling. I needed her in my life, without her I feel like I have missing pieces inside myself, she could tell me everything, anything and I wouldn't run no matter what she said, I just need her, I need her with me.

She interesting and different in her own way, she's special and I like everything about that. Even when she's not with me she's still in my heart and even if I try to move on from her I still have all these feelings and a part of me just can't let go. Without her there is no me. She won't be able to just get rid of me, I'll fight, I'll do whatever it takes, which is why I am going to make sure that I look extra good tonight.

**Brittany's Point of View**

Thank god for Santana, she invited me out tonight and I don't know what I'd do without her, she is the perfect distraction for everything that has happened. I could always go to Rachel for comfort but I know that she'll just go on about the problem which usually makes me feel worse. She's not bad at comforting people I just don't like the way she comforts me. I like how Santana comforts people, at the reunion when she found me in the bathroom she was so nice and she made me feel safe, that's what I love.

I don't want to tell her what's wrong, I'm not ready for that, I'm not ready for anyone to know but just to have her with me will be enough for me tonight. I can't believe I had to deal with this today, everything sucks. I'm ready to go out and have a good time forgetting about everything that's troubling me.

After crying for what seemed like forever I have to redo my make up, I can't let anyone know I've been crying and I think I've gotten rid of all my tears so it will be safe to make myself look pretty again. Once I finish making myself look as good as possible I go outside to hail a taxi, I can't wait to see Santana, I really need this, to go out and have a good night. Thankfully she texted me, with everything going on these last couple of days I haven't really had time to text anyone.

I arrive at the club a little close to nine wearing my light blue cocktail dress; my hair is flowing down my shoulders, curled at the bottom and I'm wearing my silver heels. I'm ready for action. I enter the club and notice that right away I'm getting the attention of guys, I try to ignore them as I look for Santana. As I make my way further into the club I manage to see she's at a booth with her friends. I start walking towards her and thankfully she see's me.

She stands up and I can't help but feel so hot. She's gorgeous, way to hot for me to function. She's in a tight black dress that extenuates everything perfectly, it really shows off her cleavage and I have to remember to look at her face or she'll get suspicious but god it's so perfect. Her dress is really short and I notice guys looking at her, I can't help but feel a little jealous. Just seeing her makes me heart race I've never been so turned on by just looking at someone. Our eyes lock it's like we're the only two people in the club and I can't help but smile, she's all that I want.

"Hi," I say because it's the only thing I can say without stuttering or making a fool of myself.

"Hi," she replies with a grin on her face, I love her smile it's so cheerful and it makes my heart flutter every time I see it. "I'm glad you made it."

"Yeah me too," I tell her, she doesn't no how badly I needed this.

"Let me introduce you to everyone," she says grabbing onto my arm and pulls me toward the table. For the seconds she held onto my arm made me the happiest person in the world. I felt sparks fly all up my arm right to my heart making the room feel really hot.

"This is Sam," she motioned to a blonde haired guy with the biggest mouth I'd ever seen, "Josh," she motioned to a guy with brown curly hair who looked kind of strange, "My main guy Puck," he had a Mohawk. I recognize him from when they shot me with a paintball, "and my girl Quinn," she was blonde as well. She was really pretty. "Puck and Quinn are my roommates," she told me.

"Nice to meet you all," I told them, I suddenly see Josh get up and come stand next to me he give me a cheesy grin, I think he's trying to act cute but I've seen ducks cuter than him. Ducks are cuter I really like them. It was so nice how Santana took me to the park and fed the ducks with me she's really nice.

"Well hey there," Josh said to me, I didn't want to be rude but I really didn't want to lead him on either.

"Hi," I said in a small voice hoping he would go away.

"Josh, leave her alone she's doesn't need you hitting on her," thank god for Santana, I looked at her and smiled thanking her for getting him away from me. Josh went back to the booth and sat down.

Santana goes to sit down at the booth and slides over making room for me, I happily sit down next to her but unfortunately I'm sitting across from Josh, who keeps looking at me weird, I think he's trying to make a sex face but it just looks like his constipated, I wondered how this guy can get any girl. I focus my attention on Santana, she's way prettier then anyone in this club, she's all I needed to see.

I can tell they've all had a few drinks already, Santana looks the most sober I think that maybe she was waiting for me to get here. Quinn and Puck look really wasted, they keep falling into each other like they're trying to flirt but they're so drunk they don't really know what they're doing. I think it's cute.

"So Brittany tell us something about yourself," Quinn told me.

"Well I'm majoring in dance, I hope to be on choreograph a Broadway show someday or something," I told her.

"That's really cool! It is good to follow your dreams!" I was surprised even though she was drunk she could actually hold a pretty good conversation.

"Hey I know who you are! I just realized, you're the paintball girl! Yeah, Josh shot you and you slammed your head against the rock," obviously, Sam I think is was, couldn't hold a conversation when he was drunk or maybe he acted like that in general. I couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed. "Girl you got knocked pretty good!"

"Sam shut it," Santana snapped.

"Oh that was you! No offence but that was a beautiful shot!" Josh said as he high fived Sam, I slumped down in my seat a little bit and I think Santana noticed because the next thing she said really surprised me.

"Can you both shut up! Honestly your acting like fucking two year olds, leave Brittany alone or you'll be getting a visit from snix, got it ass holes?" I remember when she used to go all snix on people back in high school, but now she was defending me and it made me get all fluffy inside.

"Sorry," Sam said.

"I wasn't," Josh said, he really wasn't very nice.

"Do you want to dance?" Santana said to me ignoring Josh's comment, I think she was feeling my discomfort, I quickly nodded and she helped me up as we headed to the dance floor with all the sweaty bodies that were squished together, it's time I finally get to show off my moves.

She slowly swung her hips to the beat while her hands were up in the air. I was swaying a little but I could help but stare at her while she was dancing, she was so breathtaking. I needed to be closer. I needed to feel her body on mine so I spun her around and grabbed her hips. Our bodies pressed tightly together while we rolled our hips the song. Our bodies fit perfectly together.

I felt so hot and turned on but I really hoped that she didn't notice, I didn't want her to know my heart rate was beating very fast because I still wasn't sure what was going on between _us. _Just when I though I couldn't get any hotter her head fell back against my shoulder and I wrapped my arms around her and we continued dancing. I felt myself getting wet, the way her hips were bouncing and rocking against my body is killing me. I just wanted to take her home and rip of her clothes; I needed to feel more of her.

I wanted to kiss her shoulder, kiss her neck but I knew that might be going too far, I had to try and contain myself. She grinding harder into me, I had to bit my lip to hold in my moan. God she was so hot. Her hands slipped into my hair so I let go of her hips and ran my fingers up her body, I could feel her shiver into me, I think she was just as turned on as I was, I hope she was at least.

She slowly turned around to look at me, I could see she looked flustered I succeeded at my job. I was going to make her want me, to need me, I had to make her mine. I could feel her getting hot, the song finished and I felt her whisper something into my ear. I was way to hot to function.

"Wanna get a drink?" I just nodded knowing that if I tried to say anything now nothing would come out right, all my words would be in a jumble.

She led me over towards the bar and ordered some drinks; I would need a lot of help me cool off. Santana handed me a shot and on the count of three we both swigged it back, we then continued to talk about the most random things. I told her some facts about the ocean and she told me about her favorite singers. I really enjoyed listening to her. After we had taken a couple of shot I started getting really tipsy. I wasn't too drunk but I did feel the alcohol in my system.

"Okay, favorite movie?" She asked me, we decided that we would try to get to know each other and if we had something in common we would take a shot. That wasn't a very good idea because we were having way to many shots so we decided just to stick with getting to know each other and a beer.

"I'd have to say Lilo and Stitch, it's so cute! And the ugly duckling story that Lilo reads to him! That's my favorite part!" I say excitedly.

"Why am I not surprised," she says with a smile. Normally when I tell people that's my favorite movie that laugh and tell me I'm being childish but not Santana, she just smiled. She made me feel good about myself and I just loved that about her.

"Favorite food?" I ask her.

"Um... pasta, defiantly spaghetti and meatballs, there my fav," I smiled at her choice, that was one of my favorite means as well. I loved how in the Lady and the Tramp they did the meatball scene that was cute. "Favorite color?"

"Pink," I loved pink, it was such a bright color and was the color of love, well so was red but I liked pink better. "What about you?"

"I really like blue," she told me.

"Really? I didn't expect you to be a blue sort of person," I told her making her smile.

"And what kind of color do you think I might be?" She asked me, I had to think about it for a little but I had the perfect answer for her.

"Orange," she raised an eyebrow at me, I could tell she was wondering why I picked that color for her. "Because, it's bright and fun to be around but it also had a bit of an edge towards it, a bit of a tough side," she chuckled.

"Well I guess I'm an orange person," she told me with a laugh. Her laugh was the best sound I ever heard, I swear if it was a drug I'd be hooked on it right away.

We talk a little more drinking our beer, I really like getting to know Santana better. She ignores all the other guys and girls staring at her and continues to talk to me, I feel really lucky as of right now. She's laughing and smiling at me but suddenly I see her expression change to more of a surprised and angry look.

"Shit," she says. I wonder what's she talking about until I hear footsteps behind me and someone starts to talk to her. I can tell she's not a fan of them.

"Well look who it is, Santana how are you," the girl says. I must admit she's really pretty, she has light brown hair and green eyes but as pretty as she is I can't help that I don't like her.

"Stephanie I thought you left to go back home?" She asked, she seemed really confused.

"I did, but now I'm back," the girl tells her.

"Oh," was all Santana managed to say.

"Come on Sanny dear don't tell me you didn't miss me?" She asked, they had some history here and I couldn't help but feel a little jealous. I think that she might have been an ex girlfriend or something. Santana doesn't answer her, she just looks down, she's hurt and to see her like this breaks my heart and I hated how she called her _Sanny dear. _

"You did miss me," the girl, Stephanie says to her with a smug look on her face.

"Please go away," Santana says, I've never seen her so venerable this person must have hurt her bad.

"Aw come on now, I'm just trying to get my girlfriend back," I see Santana shift in her seat, she's feeling very uncomfortable and before I think about what I'm doing it the words come out of my mouth.

"Well you can't do that because she already has a new girlfriend, who cares about her very much and is way better than you," oh shit what did I just say. I look at Stephanie and she gives me _the_ look. God if looks could kill. Then I look at Santana who looks surprised but then her expression softens and I know she's thankful I said what I did.

"Oh, I see," Stephanie says.

"Yeah, I do." Santana says more boldly. "This is Brittany."

"Brittany. Well I hate to ruin your little skit but I really don't believe you for a second. I think she's just a friend that jumped into this conversation to help you out so, Brittany you can leave now. I know it's a lie," no way was she going to hurt Santana like that. This girl doesn't know what's coming.

"Oh I'm dating her, I really don't know why you stopped, she's amazing, perfect, smart, when I'm with her she takes away all my worries and puts a smile on my face, she makes me feel like I'm worth more than anything else in the world so I really don't know why you would give that all away. So now I want you to stay away from her because she's mine," I say as convincing as possible. The truth was I actually meant all that so I'm pretty sure I sounded convincing. I was really wound up at the moment, I didn't think I had that in me.

"I see, well words are just words until you prove it," was she serious? I always was taught to give people a chance when I met them but this girl did not get a chance. I didn't like her, I didn't like the way she was acting towards Santana.

"You want us to prove that she's my girlfriend?" Santana asked her.

"Yes," I looked to Santana, I knew just how we were going to have to prove it, I was perfectly okay with it but after what happened to us I didn't know if she would be all that okay with it.

"Fine," Santana said sternly and fast. That surprised me but I could tell she was getting angry now and would do anything to prove this other girl wrong. I couldn't believe this was going to happen, after all this waiting I would get to feel Santana's soft caring lips on mine again, of course this isn't what I pictured it to be like for our second kiss but I really wasn't complaining. I would get to kiss her again and that was good enough for me.

Santana turned to me and looked into my eyes I could tell she was trying to ask me if this was okay so I smiled back at her. We grew closer together and I could feel her breath on me now, it was sweet, I just wanted to grab her, kiss her, hold her in my arms forever but I was going to go at her pace.

She was right in front of me and then she finally closed the gap. I felt life inside of me, the way she made me feel when she kissed me was the best feeling in the world. It was filled with so much passion and emotion. Even though she was angry her kisses made me think otherwise, it was so gentle and filled with care. It warmed me up, making my heart flutter and my body grow weak. Her lips were so soft; this was even better then the first time she kissed me.

Slowly we pulled apart and I was sad that it was over, I wanted to lean in and kiss her again, kiss her multiple times but unfortunately I couldn't do that. All I could do was smile at her and thankfully she returned it. I looked back over at Stephanie who looked pissed off.

"Well I guess you didn't lie," Stephanie mumbled.

"Nope, so why don't you leave us alone now, thanks," Santana said in her bitchy tone, I had to admit I found it very sexy.

Stephanie left in a huff, I couldn't help but smile, as much as I didn't like Stephanie I as glad she got Santana and me to kiss again, everything about the kiss was so magical I couldn't help but smile, I just hoped Santana felt the same way and didn't regret what just happened.

"Thanks," was all Santana said to me.

"No problem," I told her, I didn't know what else to say.

"Sorry, she can be really crazy sometimes and I just couldn't stand her knowing she was right, I would have never heard the end of it, I just, that was a dark time and..."

"Santana, you don't have to explain," I told her, I knew this was hard for her and I didn't want her to have to say anything she wasn't comfortable with.

"Well thanks, it meant a lot," I could tell she meant it, her eyes never looked so vulnerable, like I could see right into her soul. I was just happy that girl left her alone.

"How about we have another drink?" I tell her trying to get her mind off of things.

"Please," she said as she hailed down the bar tender. He brought over two more shots which were gone in seconds, thank god for drinking, a way to forget all your problems.

After we had a few more drinks I really needed to pee. I tried holding it because I didn't want to leave Santana even though she did have her friends her so I don't know why I was so worried, I just didn't want her dealing with Stephanie anymore. I knew if I didn't go to the bathroom I would burst.

"I need to pee," I told her, she just laughed as I headed to the bathroom.

When I came out of the stall, very relieved, I was met with a familiar face, I face I really didn't want to see for a long time. It was Stephanie, but she looked like she was waiting for me, just my luck. I really didn't feel like some ex girlfriend to current (sort of) girlfriend but I guess that's what was coming.

Maybe if I just avoided her she would leave me alone so I went to go wash my hands but she blocked the way, this girl really wasn't nice. I didn't like people that weren't friendly, I like giving people a chance but this girl didn't deserve that chance.

"Excuse me," I told her trying to get around her but she wouldn't let me.

"I need to have a word with you," she told me.

"And what might that be?" I asked her, she was really going to do this here... great.

"You might have Santana now, but just remember everyone goes back to their first love so I wouldn't get to comfortable, she'll be mind very soon," who did this person think she was, normally I wasn't a very angry person but when someone messed with Santana they were so going to get it.

"First of all, Santana doesn't like you at all, secondly she loved me first! I went to high school with her and she admitted she loved me back then bitch, so suck on that!" I had to admit that felt really good.

"You're just making that up!" She told me.

"Am not!" I told her, the truth was I kind of way but she did admit to having feelings for me so maybe I stretched the truth a little bit, but it was worth it to see the surprised look on Stephanie's face.

"She didn't know what love was back then," Stephanie snapped.

"Who's to say she knew what it was when she was dating you, obviously you don't have a clue what it means, if you did you'd let Santana be happy and clearly she's not happy with you," I told her, she was getting me very angry.

"Please you aren't even her type, she could do so much better than you," she told me and now she just crossed the line, thankfully all that anger I had in high school was stored away for moments like this.

"Oh I'm sorry that I'm not a bitch, that I'm caring and that I'll be twice the person you'll ever be, lets get something straight if I'm not good enough for her then you are defiantly not good enough," I say very clearly so she understand every word that is coming out of my mouth.

"You really don't want to get into a fight with me," she told me.

"You're right I don't, I'm going to be the bigger person and leave you here while I go back out there totally unfazed by you," I told her straight to her face.

"Just you wait, I'll get her back, you don't have a chance," she tells me.

"Good luck," I say sarcastically as I make my way out of the bathroom, I really didn't feel like getting into a fight, it wasn't what I do. I was nice person.

I saw Santana talking with her friends again, well talking with Sam and Josh, I looked over to see Puck and Quinn dancing together and it looked like things were starting to heat up between them. They looked cute together, I must admit that, Puck was grinding hard against Quinn kissing her neck. I could tell where that was going to lead to.

I made my way over to Santana and sat beside her only to realize that Josh was once again staring at me. I really wasn't interested in him, I was only interested in Santana. She thinks that I just want to be friends for now but I want to be so much more than that, I'm just afraid what will happen if I admit my feelings. I'm usually really good with feelings but when I see Santana I get all nervous and crumbly, she just has this effect on me.

They were in the middle of a conversation so I decided not to interrupt, instead I decided to check my phone only to see there was one text message waiting for me. I didn't want to read it, it was one of the most painful things I had to do, I wanted to get away from this just for one night but it seemed like I couldn't.

**Privet Number: It's not looking so good. Be strong. Sorry. **

Was all it said. I knew exactly who it was from because they've been texting me from that number for the last couple of days. I tried to hold back my tears and put on a brave face, I didn't want this to ruin my evening. I was having the perfect night and I really didn't need this to get to me.

I just kept looking at the message reading it over and over again, my mind was racing right now. I had to stop but I couldn't pull my eyes away from it, I felt something on my shoulder and I saw that Santana's hand was resting on it, she looked at me with sad eyes.

"You okay?" I nodded; I didn't want to spoil her evening. I tried to smile but it was a failed attempted.

"Does this have something to do with what you told me earlier?" She asked me with so much care, she was so gentle about it I couldn't lie to her so I just nodded and tried to shrug it off.

"Do you want to leave?" She asked me and again I just nodded, I couldn't help but replay those words in my mind over and over again.

She helped me up, we said bye to her friends. She quickly ran off to find Quinn and Puck to tell them we were leaving, she found them, together, making out. It looked like she was proud of them, I guess it was a good step for their relationship. Afterwards she lead me outside and hailed a taxi. I looked at her, she was so friendly and caring I was so happy I had a friend like her.

All that made me realize that I didn't want to be alone tonight, I think I'd start crying or something and I really wasn't in the mood for that, I practically spend the whole day crying. I was supposed to have fun tonight and I must admit that up until that text I was but now everything had changed.

When we were in the cab, heading to my door room I felt slightly disappointed, I knew Santana was probably going to go back to her place after because mine was defiantly not big enough for a third person.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" I asked her in a small voice, I knew I probably sounded needy and I didn't like that but I did really need her, I needed someone that would make the pain go away.

"Oh course," thankfully Santana told the taxi driver to take her back to her place because she knew that mine would be to small to stay over. She helped me out of the cab and gave me some clothes to wear for the night, I felt so safe when Santana took care of me. She made me feel happy.

As I lay down in bed she lay beside me, my chest was pounding inside of me, all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around her and hold her tight. I all ready was feeling better because she was beside me, no matter how badly I was feeling she could always make me happy.

"So Puck and Quinn?" I said trying to distract myself from the text.

"Yeah, finally. They've liked each other for a while," she told me.

"Good for them." I said and slowly realized that I was about to fall asleep.

000000000000000000

"_Brittany," I heard a voice calling me from around the corner. I needed to follow it, it sounded familiar but I was scared, the corner lead to a black ally and I couldn't see anything in it, only one little light that danced in the middle. _

"_Brittany help," I heard it again and I felt my eyes start to water. I knew who the voice belonged too, I needed to be there to help. I couldn't let anything happen, not this time. No, this time I had to do something. I wouldn't be a scared girl again, I needed to help. _

_I felt myself running into the ally looking around me for the voice, looking to help but I couldn't see anything, all I could see was darkness. I felt so helpless. I ran up to the light but as I reached it, it turned off and turned on somewhere else, this wasn't happening now. My body clenched up and felt tight as if I couldn't move. _

"_Help me! Brittany help!" The voice sounded more desperate this time. I ran as fast as I could towards the voice, I could see something up ahead of me. Suddenly a flash of light surrounded me, blinding me. I fell to the ground unable to see. I closed my eyes tight. _

_When I finally opened them I realized I was in a white room, there was no voice, there wasn't anyone. I was completely by myself no one to help me no one to tell me everything would be all right. I looked around scared as ever, until the floors started to shake. The floors shook and blackness once again was talking over, but the blackness was a figure. _

"_You left me! You didn't help me," the voice was back and it was angry. I felt so bad, this was all my fault, I let this happen. The shadow rose up over top of me and hit the wall and then... I fell. I fell through the floor screaming. _

"_Brittany you left me!" The voice kept calling. _

"_Brittany, hey I'm talking to you," I needed to escape this voice, it seemed like it was following me everywhere. It was deep and scary. _

"_Please Britt wake up," this time the voice was nicer, calming. _

"Britt?" I snapped my eyes open and jolted up, I looked around frantically, I wasn't in my bed, I wasn't at home. I looked around in a panic until I felt someone move next to me. I snapped my head to look beside me and was Santana looking at me with worried eyes. I had spend the night at Santana's, I remember now.

She looked frightened for me, I must have been screaming in my sleep, that's embarrassing. It wasn't until I wiped my eyes because I realized I had been crying that I also felt myself shaking. I know I had a nightmare, I hadn't had a nightmare like that since I was twelve years old.

"Britt, are you okay?" She asked me , I wanted to tell her I was fine, but I didn't want to lie to her either, so I shook my head and broke out into tears.

She quickly shifted over to me, holding me while I cried. I scooted closer to her and hugged her back, she was so warm and caring. I felt myself still shaking but her warmth was slowly calming me down. Everything just happened so fast, I didn't want to deal with any of this.

"Did this have something to do with that thing at the bar?" She asked me.

"Yes," I said with a weak voice so she just held me closer to her.

"I'm so sorry Britt," she said stocking my back.

"Thank you," I said. "For letting me stay here," I was so grateful she let me stay, just to be in her arms made everything seem better, it seemed like everything would work out.

"Whenever you need me, I'll be here," she said holding me close. We stayed like that for a while, her holding me, stocking my back as I nuzzled myself in her neck. She just kept staying that she was here and it would be all right.

**I wonder what's going on with Brittany? Why is she so sad? What do you think is going on with her and how did you like the chapter? Anyway hope you liked it and remember the more reviews I get the fast I update! **


	9. A Different Flavour

The morning sun crept into the room waking me up. I should have been really frustrated by this but I was so comfy I really didn't care. I opened my eyes and looked around the room remembering that I was with Santana, my head was resting on her stomach and she was holding me close, no wonder I felt so safe. I want to walk up like this every morning.

I looked up and saw that Santana was already up and she was looking at me. Once she saw me looking back she smiled, it gave me a fluffy feeling inside. I really liked cuddling with her, she was so warm and after everything that happened last night I was glad to wake up to a smiling face. She made everything seem right, she made it seem like it was just us too in the world and all my problems had disappeared.

"Hey," she said to me.

"Hey." I said back.

"You feeling better?" She was asking about last night, about the text and everything that had happened.

"I really don't feel like talking about it," I say, I don't want to get sad again, I know I will cry if I talk about it and right now I just want to be happy. Yesterday took a lot out of me and I'm really to have some fun today.

"That's fine, but then I want to do something so you have a great day today," she always knew what to say or what to do, I just loved that about her.

"What did you have in mind?" I asked her.

"You said you liked the park and ducks so I was thinking we could spend the day there and then grab some lunch or something," she told me. That sounded like a date but I wasn't about to ask her about it, I didn't want to screw up anything. She was probably just suggesting that to get my mind off of things and that's all. I could think it was a date though, I don't care if she didn't think that, I was happy to spend the whole day with her.

"I like that idea!" I told her excitedly. "Can we feed the ducks again? There's so cute the way they waddle and come up to us to eat the food!" Santana laughed, it was nice to hear her laugh.

"Anything you want Britt-Britt," she told me.

"Thanks," I said cheerfully. She made me feel so alive inside, I wish I could just grab her and kiss her.

"How about we have some breakfast and then we get going?" She asked me and I could only nod. "Pancakes okay?" Pancakes are my favorite so I nod furiously.

00000000000000

Santana and I walked around the park side by side, she looked so pretty with the wind blowing in her hair and the sun shining in her face. All I wanted was to reach down and hold her hand but I didn't have enough courage to go for it. Instead I sped up my pace so I was just a little ahead of her, I was so nervous.

Even though Santana was not mine... yet, I was so thankful for her. She was the sweetest most caring person I'd ever met. I knew I could always count on her if I was feeling sad or just needed a hug. She was there for me, especially last night when she took care of me. I felt so safe in her arms like the whole world just disappeared and nothing could hurt me. She made me feel so special, I wish she was mine.

We walked down the path looking at all the nature. I saw butterflies flying past us and was so tempted to go and chase them, I started skipping after them, they looked so free how they flew off without a care in the world. As I skipped after them I could hear Santana laughing behind me, I don't think she as laughing at me thou, I think she was laughing with me.

The tree's were so green and the grass was soft, I never really thought Santana would be into nature but here she is, walking in the park with me so I guess I was wrong. We walked further up ahead and that's when I saw the most exciting thing ever. There was an ice cream cart not too far ahead of us. My eyes practically bulged out of my head, I wanted an ice cream! I love ice cream. I turned to Santana who was smiling at me, I think she knew what I was going to ask.

"Please?" I asked her while doing my famous pout.

"You know I can't say know to your pout," she said smiling, I bounced up with joy and made my way over towards the cart.

There were so many flavors to choose from how could I decide on just one. I must have spent five minutes looking at all the flavors they had until it finally stood out for me. It was a swirly ice cream stick with chocolate and strawberry mixed in together. It looked so good, I wanted it.

"Can I have that one please?" I said pointing to the swirly ice cream picture.

"I'm sorry miss but we're running low on those and saving them for later in the day," I felt a rush of sadness come over me.

"Are you serious! That had to be the stupidest thing I ever heard," I could tell Santana wasn't too happy, once again she was protecting me. She was really mad at the ice cream guy.

"I'm sorry but that's just the way it works. Can't your friend buy another ice cream?" Santana looked at him as if he was stupid.

"Britt here wants that ice cream and that only and what she wants she gets. You still have ice cream left so if you have some give it too her. You wouldn't deprive a child of their ice cream so you're not going to do that to my Britt either. So either you give her that ice cream or you'll have me go all lima heights on your ass, do we have an understanding?" Santana said very harshly. The guy looking at her in shock and nodded him head very fast. It looked funny, like one of those bobble heads you can get, that made me laugh.

"One swirly ice cream coming right up," the man said still scared for his life.

"That's what I like to hear," Santana said as he handed me my ice cream. I went to my wallet to get money out but I felt a hand over mine to tell me to stop looking. I looked up to see Santana smiling back at me, her hand over mine filled my stomach with so many butterflies I had to try and contain my smile.

"I'll pay for it, don't worry," Santana said.

"But I..." she cut me off when she put her hand to my mouth shaking her head. I smiled against her hand, I think she could feel it because she smiled back.

"I'll pay for it okay, don't worry," she said.

"Thanks San," she made me feel so special inside, even the smallest things she did for me seemed like the biggest things in the whole wide world.

I got my ice cream as Santana paid for me and when I tasted it, it felt like my mouth was filled with jumping beans. It was so good! Santana and I started to walk off from the ice cream guy when he did something I really wish he hadn't. I didn't expect him to be so mean, he seemed like he'd be a sweet guy if Santana didn't scare him. He through an ice cream cone right at my back, so that I had a big chocolate stain on my nice shirt.

"Stupid bitch!" He yelled to me. Those words cut into me like knives making me want to cry because everyone always called me stupid especially in high school. It hurt.

It felt so cold and sticky, I felt myself want to cry but I knew that would be really pathetic so I tried to hold it in. I think Santana noticed that my eyes were getting watery because she got really angry. She whipped her head around at the guy fuming with anger. I had only seen her this way in high school and that was her scary side.

"Listen here you pathetic little shit! How dare you do that to Brittany! She's sweet and caring and more then the person you will ever be. I warned you," she raced back towards him, I think she was about to throw a punch or something at him so I quickly reached for her hand and held onto it tight pulling her away.

"Just leave it please, it's not even that big of a deal," I told her trying to sound convincing.

"Not that big of a deal! Britt this guy ruined your new shirt, he called you stupid, no one should ever call you stupid because you're the smartest person ever ok," she told me and as I looked into her eyes I saw that soft caring side again, I could tell she really meant it.

"Please, can we go?" I asked her as gentle as possible. I clutched her hand a little tighter and I felt her relax, that made my heart all bubbly inside.

"Fine," she said walking away.

"Weak!" The guy called after her but Santana held up her hand and quickly flipped him off, I couldn't help but laugh at that. That's when I realized we were still holding hands, my heart became all fluttery again and I smiled bigger then I ever thought I could before, her skin felt so soft on mine and our fingers fit together perfectly, it was one of those magic moments.

"Come over here," Santana said to me bringing me to a park bench that was off the trail by a pond. Over on the other side of the pond there were some musicians playing some jazz. There music was so relaxing, if I was dating Santana I would say this was the perfect date, minus the fact that ice cream was dripping down my back.

She sat me down on the bench and then began to ruffle through her bag, I wondered what she was looking for. Maybe her lip gloss or something, I really didn't mind though, the way her hair fell off her shoulders as she searched looked so sexy.

To my realization I saw that Santana had pulled a few tissues out of her bag, she motioned for me to turn around and then I got it. She was cleaning the ice cream off of my shirt. She was so caring and concerned, normally the people I've dated in the past would just tell me to such it up or clean it up myself but Santana actually took the time to help me out. I'm glad I wasn't facing her because if she saw how big my smile was now that would be embarrassing.

"He really got you good," Santana told me, I could feel the stickiness of the ice cream on me.

"Yeah," I sighed.

I felt her fingers graze over my skin as she was trying to get the ice cream off my back and shirt. She was being so gentle but I couldn't help but feel hot each time her fingers touched me. I wish we could stay like this forever. I heard the music going on around us, everything in this moment felt so perfect.

"I don't think I can get it all off, I'm sorry," she told me.

"That's okay, I was going to change anyways once I got home," I told her.

"No you weren't," she told me very bluntly as she whispered in near my ear. Her voice sent shivers over my body, she was so close.

"Yeah you're right, I really like this top."

"I'll buy you a new one," I was surprised no one had offered to buy me anything before.

"You don't have to do that," I told her. I didn't want her to waste her money on me, I'm sure she could buy other things with it and I'm really not that special, at least that's what I've been told all through high school.

"But I want too, there I think I've gotten most of it," she said as I turned around only to realize I was right in front of her face. She was so close to me, her lips were right in front of me. They looked so soft and perfect I just wanted to kiss her. I looked up at her eyes so see them sparkling.

My heart started beating so fast all I had to do was lean in a little bit and I would be kissing her. Everything seemed so right, the music, the park ,it would be a perfect moment, before I could think anymore I realized that _she _had leaned in the rest of the way and was kissing me. I felt my heart melt and once I realized what was going on and then I kissed her back.

It was so perfect, our lips fit together perfectly, it was like magic dancing inside of me, she tasted so good. I moved my hand up so I was holding her neck and my other hand was resting on her thigh. I instantly felt her hand graze up my back holding me tight. Her touch felt so good, it was like we had been kissing forever.

I decided to be bold so I grazed her bottom lip begging for entrance, and within seconds she granted me my wish. Our kisses slowly got deeper and deeper, I was trying so hard to control myself but the effect she had on me was so strong I knew that pretty soon I wouldn't be strong enough. She made my knee's weak and if I wasn't for the fact that we were sitting down I would have probably collapsed.

Slowly we pulled away even though I wished I could kiss her forever, too bad I needed air. I kept my eyes closed to saver the moment, I wanted this to be real I wanted to saver everything I felt, all the emotions that rushed through me. I wanted to save the effect she had on me. I opened my eyes and was met with her beautiful brown eyes looking back at me, she was smiling which warmed my heart completely.

We didn't say anything after that, I didn't want to say anything that could possibly ruin the moment. I always spoke my mind and I didn't was to screw this up. She then moved her head so she was lying on my lap she looked so cute lying on me. I moved my hand so it was resting on her back, genially moving my thumb so stroking her. We sat there for a few minutes just listening to the music and watching the ducks in the pond.

Just then I heard my phone go off ruining this perfect moment, it made me groan. I could hear Santana giggle, I would have never thought she'd giggle, once she heard my groan. I looked at the called ID to see that Tina was calling me. Oh great, she probably wanted to talk about the other night.

"Who is it?" Santana asked me.

"Tina," I could feel her tense, I knew she remembered that night just as well as I did. I didn't want any guy I just wanted Santana and now after the kiss I really hoped she wanted me too.

"Are you going to answer it?" I honestly didn't know what I was going to do so I just shrugged. "Do you want me to talk to her?"

"I do but then she'll just want to talk to me more, she didn't really like the idea that I was hanging out with you too much," I told her and I knew if Santana answered my phone than she would really hunt my down and tell me all the reasons why I shouldn't be friends with San.

"I think you should answer it, and tell you're busy," Santana said with a mischievous smirk.

"Maybe I will," I said as I pocked Santana's cheek, which only made her nuzzle further into me to hide her smile. It was the cutest thing I'd ever seen.

"Yes?" I said as I answered my phone.

"_Britt! Hey, I didn't think you would pick up," _she told me.

"Well I did so can you make this fast because I'm busy at the moment," I didn't want to sound mean but I was still mad at her and I normally forgive people really easily so if I talk to them less the longer I can stay mad.

"_I wanted to talk to you about the other night, with Santana. You're not still hanging out with her are you because you know what she did to you or did you go through some memory loss,"_ I couldn't believe the things she was saying to me, I though she was going to apologize but this was really mean. Every time I talked to her I felt like crap, I really don't know why I'm friends with her, but yet I am.

"Is that why you called me," I tried to sound really annoyed.

"_No, I know you're not hanging out with that bitch don't worry, I called to say that I found you another guy, his names Ben. What do you think?" _

"No," I said and then hung up the phone. I was pretty proud of myself, I never had the courage to do that before but if I had to hear another thing about the perfect guy she found me to date I think I'd explode plus I already found my perfect girl.

"What did she want this time?" Santana asked me looking concerned. To see her all caring made my heart warm up, I never though that Santana would ever be worried about me. If someone told me when I was in high school that Santana Lopez would want to be my friend and even kiss me I wouldn't have believed them.

"She told me she had a guy she wanted to set me up with," Santana's face turned to worry.

"Oh, are you going to?" She was quietly.

"No, I already found someone I really like," I told her but she still looked sad and broken, that really confused me.

"That's good," She quickly looked at her phone and then looked back at me as if she was about to cry. "I have to go Quinn has an emergency," she said as she quickly started to walk off. Then it clicked. I raced after her and grabbed onto her arm before she could walk away from me anymore.

I pressed my lips up against her's, hard and kissed her with everything I could. I wanted to show her how much I cared for her and just her. I felt her kissing me back. I felt so happy when I was with her, like us together could bring happiness to everyone.

"San, I really like you," I told her honestly. That was the first time I've actually been open about my feelings to anyone and it felt good. It took a lot of effort to get that out and I was shaking but when I saw her smile again it made everything seem worth it.

"I like you too," she told me with the biggest smile on her face, I couldn't help but smile when she said that too me.

"I have to tell you something," I was nervous. "When you kissed me before, at the reunion, I really liked you then too but I was really scared, I'm still really scared because I, being back there brought back a lot of bad memories."

She was listening to me really attentively. I never had someone listen to me and be that interested in my life before, it felt good but at the same time I was really scared because no one really knew this story.

"After you left everyone continued to call me stupid and say that I was a worthless loser and stuff, finally it stopped but I didn't realize why it stopped. I dated this guy Artie for some time, I really liked him and I thought he really liked me but it turns out he only was dating me to take my virginity and helping the guys find out everything in my life so they could later use it against me to show me how much of a loser I really am," I reached up to scratch my face when I realized my cheeks were wet. I didn't realize I had started crying.

"Britt, I want you to know I would never do that to you okay," she looked so concerned for me. I wanted to believe, but I am still a little scared. I nodded my head trying to believe it.

Santana then wrapped her arms around me into a big hug. I nuzzled my face into her neck feeling the tears running down my face. She held onto me so tightly, just being in her arms already made me feel better and safe. When she held onto me it made me feel like everything would be alright.

"You're not a loser okay. You never were. You're the smartest, kind, funny more beautiful girl I've ever met. You are amazing, and don't you dare let anyone tell you otherwise," her words made me smile.

"Thank you," I told her, still in her arms, she then kissed my head making my stomach flutter. "You want to go back? Watch a movie or something?"

"That sounds like a great idea, but Quinn actually does have an emergency," Santana told me with a little laugh. "Puck finally decided to ask her out and well Quinn, she's having a little freak attack." I laughed at that.

"Go help your friend," I told her.

"You going to be okay?" She asked me, I was now that I know that we were moving forward in our relationship. I wanted to stay with Santana for the whole day but I didn't want to seem selfish.

"I'll be fine," I said as best as I could.

"You're lying," she told me.

"Am not," I kicked myself for saying that because that really didn't sound that convincing at all.

"I'll come to your room as soon as I'm done, and this time you better be home," she said as a joke, it made me smile inside.

"I will be, don't worry," I told her giving her a hug again. I felt like the luckiest person every, I could hug Santana whenever I wanted to. I wanted to kiss her but I was still a little unsure where we stood in that department.

I watched Santana leave, just when she was almost out of sight I saw her turn back to me and wave, just that little action made me fell all happy inside like I was walking on a cloud. I waved back at her and I could just make out her smile. It felt great to have this feeling.

_BEEEP! _

I heard my phone go off so I checked my messages and realized that it was from Santana.

**Santana: I meant it, you really are special! See you soon maybe 40 mins :D xo**

She could make me smile even if it was just a simple text. I then saw I had another text, it was from the person that I really didn't feel like talking too.

**Tina: I know what you said but I'm sure you two will hit it off. Ben's coming to your room in 30, be there. **

Great, now what was I going to do. Santana was going to be there in 40 and he was coming in 30, I had to go back to the room for Santana. This was really going to strain me.

**Sorry that I haven't updated in a while. I've just had no inspiration to write due to some events that have taken place in my life but I'll try to be better at updating. I've also had writers block so yeah. But I hope you like this chapter! Let me know what you think. **


	10. Dont Let Me Go

**I know I once again took forever to update but I've had a really busy summer and hopefully next month everything will get back on track and I can start with quicker updates again. **

**Santana's Point of View**

I was so excited to go see Brittany again. She was perfect, so caring, and friendly, her smile could light up the whole world if it had too. Every time I was around her I felt like I was at home and safe. If it wasn't for Quinn I would have stayed with her the whole day, Quinn needed some help finding some clothes to wear on her date with Puck who had finally asked her out.

As happy as I was for them I wish they could have decided to go out on a different day. I wanted my Brittany. I tried my best to help Quinn out with her problem but my mind kept drifting off wondering what Brittany was doing at that moment. I'd be seeing her in a few minutes but I still couldn't help wonder. Every time Quinn would show me an option I tried to look really interested and I did help at times but I couldn't concentrate.

Quinn could obviously tell who I was thinking about because she was staring at me weirdly with one of those 'I know who your thinking about' smiles. She thinks she knows it all. I didn't notice she had come out of her closet with another option because I was in my own world, but she startled me.

"Go," she said to me with a knowing smile on her face.

"What?" I asked in surprise.

"Go see Brittany, and don't give me that I don't know what you're talking about look, I see you're distracted. I can figure out my outfit for myself, I'd rather you leave then stay here and drool while thinking about her," Quinn was pulling my leg with the drooling comment but she rarely lets me go when she needs help so I took full advantage of this.

"Thanks Quinny!" I say to her.

"Yeah, just go before I change my mind okay. You going, leaving me in my time of need," she joked towards me.

"I know you'll make the right decision, I believe in you." I told her smiling but she rolls her eyes at me.

"Oh yeah, that's just was I need. You're faith," I laugh at her comment.

"You know you do," I tell her.

"I'm happy for you San," that comment takes of off guard; I look at her confused which she seems to pick up on. " I haven't see you this happy in a long time. I think she's good for you."

"Yeah, she's great. She means everything to me," I say looking away so Quinn doesn't see me blushing. They say Latina's don't blush but that's bullshit because anything that involves Brittany can make me blush.

"Good, so you better no screw it up," she said to me.

"Oh and here I thought we were finally gonna have a decent conversation. Way to ruin the moment," I tell her.

"Please, I'm allowed too. You've been doing it for years," that makes me laugh as I think back to all the moments I've killed, score for me for winning.

"Well I'm gonna go now, have fun on your date," I wink at her.

"Tell Britt I say hi," Quinn says.

"You've like, met her once," I say.

"So, I'm allowed to be nice, even when I'm not there," Quinn's back in the closet now looking at things to wear while I'm packing my bag to leave. I can tell she's stressing to figure out what to wear and I feel bad for leaving but I just can't stay away form Brittany, not when things are this good.

"You're being nice, that's a shock," I tell Quinn.

"You're one to talk," Yeah I used to be a bitch but I've gotten better since then which I'm happy about. "By the way, I have a friend coming over tomorrow, I met her in class, her names Rachel so I need you to be friendly. Think you can do that?"

"Of course, I'm not all bitch 247." I tell her.

"Am I hearing this correctly," Quinn and my relationship was a strange one, we always made jokes toward one another and picked on each other continuously but when we needed a friend we were both there for each other.

"Shut up," I tell her.

"Sorry I'm just so shocked that you are capable of being nice," Quinn tells me again, of course I know she's joking but I need to leave before this gets more out of hand.

"Well I'm going now, so behave yourself tonight. Or you know feel free to tap that, I don't care," I wink at her and head out the door. I know she's rolling her eyes at me from behind.

I walk out of the house and make my way to Brittany's residence, but not before I stop by the coffee store and pick up her favorite drink. As I go pay I feel all jumpy inside, just doing something that I know will make her smile puts a smile on my face. If she's happy then so am I. I can only imagine her face when I go to her door. She's so beautiful, I love the way her eyes sparkle and how her face is always light up with happiness. She makes my heart melt.

Not to long ago I got my own key to get into Brittany's residence so she wouldn't have to come let me in all the time, or if I just wanted to surprise her. I know we just started dating but I feel like I've been with her for my whole life. Sure that's kind of true because of the fact that we did go to high school together but that was a dark time, I'm trying to get by all the terrible things I did to Brittany. She didn't deserve any of it.

I want to make it up to her, I know I have a hard time getting my feelings out and that I'm not very romantic but I try. Most people think that romance means stuff like dinner, music or candle-light but I think it means something different. I think romance means that your about showing your other halves you're willingness to do anything for them, doing small little things or jesters when they least expect it and surprise them, it means that you care. Since when did I become so cheesy.

All I want to do is hold her in my arms and call her mine. She's my everything. She's all that I need to make my world go around and fill me with happiness. I can get her out of my head, she's the last thing that's on my mind when I go to sleep and the first thing on my mind when I wake up. I've got it bad for her.

Slowly I enter her res excited to see her again. I know I said I'd come by in 40 minutes but because Quinn let me leave early I've gotten her sooner than I expected too. That's fine by me because it just means I get to see Brittany longer. I feel like I owe Quinn now for what she did and I really hate owing people, but I can make an exception for this. Anything for Brittany.

As I get closer to Brittany's room I can hear some arguing going on and some yelling. I don't know where it's coming from right now because all I hear it the guys voice. He's saying something like 'I promise I won't let you down, just give me a chance. I'm good I promise', who ever this guy was he had no game. No girl would ever fall for those words. As I got closer I could tell his tone was getting really ruff. I didn't like the sound of this.

Looking around I saw some girl coming back from where the noise was coming from; her looked at me with concerned eyes and just shook her head. She then looked back in the direction where the noise was coming from. I could tell she was scared; whatever was happing over there wasn't good at all. It worried me. That was near Brittany's room, I was getting scared now and no one ever scares me. I was the brave one, the one made of stone. I just needed to get to Brittany's room and then I would be safe, I would know that she was safe. The girl that once stood in front of me ran into her room and I heard the door lock.

Maybe I could meet Brittany somewhere else instead of going down her hallway so I took out my phone and called her. I rang for a little and then went straight into voice mail. All the doors in the hallway were close tightly shut, and the only noise was the screaming at the end of the hallway. Suddenly I heard a thump, like something hit the door and it made me just up in shock.

I stopped for a minute in the hallway to regain my breath. That's when I got the idea to call Rachel, maybe she was with Brittany in her room and could get her to meet me outside. I called her but this time there was no ringing it just went straight to voice mail. I couldn't help but think that she was in a class. Then my thoughts went to Brittany, she must be scared and wouldn't want to come out of her room. She was probably scared like me, if not more. I picked up my speed a little more to get to her quicker.

Her door was in sight but so was the door where the noise was coming from. Then from behind me I started to hear more noise, this time it was a noise I was happy to hear. Someone had called the police and they were coming in. I quickly made my way to Britt's room and banged on the door. I listened carefully and heard a whimper coming from inside.

"Britt? Baby it's me," I quickly said, I didn't want her to think I was the crazy man or something. I didn't get an answer, so I was beginning to get worried. " Babe please, can I come in?" I wanted to see her and I really didn't feel like being outside with this who situation going on.

I heard the door unlock and open a crack. Scared blue eyes peered out of the door, it broke my heart to see her like this. Once she saw it was me she opened it all the way and jumped out me, hugging me with all her might. I could tell she was really scared by all the screaming and banging. I took her hand and lead her back into the room, closing the door behind me and locking it once again.

I looked back at her and could now see clearly that she had been crying because she was so scared. I quickly wrapped my arms around her holding her in another tight hug. She clung onto me with her life. I began to stroke the back of her head trying to calm her down. I would always protect her no matter what.

"Shhh, it's ok. I'm here, I'll protect you," I said still holding her. She still was whimpering and shaking, I hated seeing her like this.

"I'm so scared San," she managed it get out with just a whisper.

"I know, but the police are on there way, just relax ok," she nods into my head and I just want to hold her forever. I want to make her feel safe. I hold onto her as tight as I can convincing her that no one will harm her and that she is safe in my arms.

"I want it to stop," Brittany said desperately.

"Me too, but we need to stay calm ok. We're safe in here," she nods her head furiously, I look into her eyes, there to scared and vulnerable. There's another crash from outside so Brittany hugs me tighter and hides her head in the crook of my neck.

"I've got you," I tell her but I just hear a whimper from her.

I got to sit on the bed taking Brittany with me. We sit there for a while; she's resting her head on my lap while I carefully run my fingers through her soft wonderful hair, we stay like that. Her shaking has stopped but I know she's still scared. Outside we hear the noise of the police, there is more shouting and banning. Something tells me the police are trying to take the man away so there is a struggle.

After a few minutes went by the hallway is silent, there is no more shouting, no more struggling, who ever was making all the noise has been taken away now. Brittany looks up at me so I take her in my arms and kiss her head. She holds me tighter and kisses me on the lips. Despite everything that had happened her kiss it still breath taking and soft. I can tell her kiss is thanking me that I'm here with her. I kiss her back with everything I have telling her that I will always be here to protect her.

"I was so scared, I thought that they maybe would come into my room. I was so close to them," Brittany says as tears filled her eyes.

"Don't cry babe please. You're safe now," I pull her closer to me and wrap my arms around her stomach kissing her neck.

"Thank you for coming," Brittany said in a small voice.

"Of course, I'd never let anyone hurt you ok," I told her, if anyone were to hurt her they'd have to deal with snix.

"Yeah, hey San?" She asks me.

"Yeah?" She holds onto my hand and starts playing with my fingers. It's such a Brittany thing to do, just being here with her makes me feel all warm inside.

"What's the time?" I don't know why she's asking that but I need to tell her anyways.

"It's like 4:30," suddenly Brittany jumps up in shock and rests her head on her knees, something's going on and it's scaring me. I don't like seeing Brittany like this especially after she was all scared.

"Oh no, no," she sais, she is making me really concerned.

"What's wrong Britt? Talk to me," I tell her.

"He's coming," she sounds really broken when she speaks like she's going to have another freak attack and I don't want that to happen.

"Who coming?" She's making me really concerned now, I don't want anyone to come hurt her especially after what she just heard.

"Tina told this guy to come to my room now, she's trying to set me up again. I don't want to meet him San. I don't want to deal with him, I don't want a guy but she doesn't listen. I can't deal with him or her now! I don't know why she doesn't listen, I just want you. I don't want nobody else!" I hold her in my arms again trying to calm her down but she's really rattled up.

This got me angry, how Tina was trying to push guys on Britt when clearly she didn't want them. I never liked her in high school and now I really don't like her. She's a bitch, and that's coming from me. I wanted to just bitch slap Tina for what she was doing to Brittany, she really didn't need all this now.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it ok," she nodded and smiled at me. It felt good to see her smile again.

"I just want her to stop," Brittany told me.

"I know, I wish I could just go all snix on her for you," I said, but she just shook her head and smiled more. I loved her smile, it could light up the whole room. She was so cute and beautiful when she smiled.

"No violence," she said.

"I know, I'll try not too."

"I think that maybe I should tell her about us soon, maybe she'll stop sending guys my way," I know how much she didn't want to tell Tina about us because of what she might do. This was a big deal for Brittany.

"We can if you're ready, but I don't want to push you to do anything," I told her, I wanted her to feel safe and not rushed. I wanted her to know she could count on me and that I would wait for as long as she needed me too.

"No I think it would be for the best. She might finally leave me alone, but there is one other problem," I looked at Brittany confused waiting for an answer. "I never told her I was a bi corn."

"I'm sure she'll be fine with that, maybe not the part about you dating me but remember that I'm always here for you," I said kissing Brittany again. I could never have enough of her lips they were like my drug.

Within that second there was a knock at the door, and the drama begins. This was probably the guy that Tina had sent for Brittany to date. He was about to hear from Santana. I promised Brittany that I wouldn't pull the violent card but if this guy pissed me off then he doesn't know what's coming. I know this guy doesn't have a clue that Brittany is dating me because we haven't gone _that _public about it and it was Tina that set him up on this thing but if he tries anything with Brittany he's gonna get a visit from Aunty Snix.

Brittany didn't budge from the bed so I got up and went to get the door. It was a tall man that stood in front of it; he had a short brown hair and blue eyes. I could tell he worked out and I must admit that if I wasn't gay that he would be pretty hot and in my liking of guys but he was here for Brittany, which made his hotness level drop way down. He was playing with his hands, I could tell that he was nervous. Loser.

"Can I help you?" I asked. I didn't mean to sound bitchy but it naturally came out especially if someone was trying to move in on my Britts.

"Oh um hi, I'm Ben. Is um Brittany here," the nervous man said.

"Hey um, Brittany um is here, but she can't um talk," I say mocking Ben, making him feel stupid about himself. I'm not being very nice right now but I just can't help myself.

"Oh will she be available soon, because I need to talk to her," Ben said to me.

"Like I said before she doesn't want to talk to you, like at all so please leave her alone." I said to him hoping that this time he would understand.

"But I'm supposed to meet her now, for a date," Ben tells me, I can tell he was getting more confidante and was going to be one of those guys that won't go away until he gets what he wants.

"Well I'm sorry to break it to you but she really doesn't want to go out with you, sorry, maybe some other girl will," I say through my teeth hoping he will leave but of course he doesn't, he just keeps getting more forceful.

"No Tina said I could date her!" He was getting angry.

"That was Tina, did you ever think of Britts feelings," I was starting to get really annoyed here.

"Well who wouldn't want this," he jesters to his body and I can't help but feel disgusted.

"Clearly another asshole," I say and I can hear Brittany snicker from the bed. He smiles cheekily and I know he heard her laugh too which means he's going to become all pushy now. He pushes me to the side knocking me into the wall. I felt my head screech with pain and I know that I hit it. From the corner of my eyes I see Brittany jump up from the bed to see if I'm okay but the asshole is blocking her.

I hold my head and try to regain my balance, for an idiot he's pretty strong. My head kills like a motherfucker. I'm ready to kick some serious ass. If he does anything to Brittany I swear to god the razor blades will come out. He stands right in front of Brittany who is looking at me with concerned eyes.

"Brittany, shall we go now?" He asks her, like she's say yes after what he did to me this guy is seriously fucked.

Brittany shakes her head quickly and looks back over at me. "No." She tells him.

"Come on, we'll have a great time together, I know you want a shot at this so be happy you can get it. Leave your friend here, come on, I'll rock your world babe," this guy got more disgusting by the second.

"She said no idiot," I said trying to make my way to Brittany. She quickly pushed Ben to the side and helped me to the bed. Her arms around me felt so warm, she made me feel so peaceful.

"What the fuck! No one rejects this," he said angrily.

"She just did, besides she's not looking for a relationship," I said, I really couldn't stand this guy anymore.

"Everyone needs one," he said snapping back at us.

"I don't, god just leave me alone!" Brittany snapped back as the guy went wide-eyed, he clearly wasn't expecting that. I had never seen this side to her before but I have to admit it was really hot.

"Come on babe, lets go out give me a chance," this guy was really pushy.

"No!" Brittany shouted.

"Babe," he said before Brittany cut him off.

"Don't call me that, my girlfriend is the only one that gets to call me that and she's better then you'll ever be. I do not want to go out with you or be your babe. I'm already Santana's and I'm happy so get out!" She pointed to the door, Ben started to get angry, I could see it in his face.

"You dirty little," before he got the last word out I kicked him in the balls causing him the scream out in pain. Pleased with myself I then proceeded to push him out the door and lock it on him. I was pretty proud of myself and Brittany for that matter. When she called me her girlfriend it made my heart flip.

I moved back to the bed trying to see clearly but my head was really being a pain in the ass and hurting like hell. I help my head where I hurt and instantly Brittany came to my side. I'm glad it wasn't her that got hurt, I would hate myself if I let anything happen to her.

"I'm so sorry, your head... I," I cut her off with a kiss. I wanted her to know she didn't have to be sorry for anything.

"Don't be sorry Britt, it wasn't you fault," I told her.

"But..." I cut her off again, I didn't want her to feel bad because a sad Brittany made a sad Santana.

"No, you have nothing to be sorry for," I said again sounding more convincing again.

"You hurt your head," she said putting her hand up to my cheek and stroking it gently. Her touch made me forget about the pain, her touch made everything feel better. I closed my eyes letting everything soak in. "We should take you to the doctors or something."

"Britt I'm fine, really, I just need you hear with me," Brittany hugged me tighter and this time it was my turn to rest my head against her. I'm glad I had her, she was my everything. She knew exactly what to do and what to say to make me feel better. I know I was really falling for her. I'm so glad I had her in my life.

"You're my night and shining armor," Brittany says to me and I can't help but feel all-warm inside. It was typical Brittany to say something like that. She loves her fantasy world.

"You've had a really dramatic day today haven't you," I say to her and she just nods her head sadly. "How about we take a quick nap and then I take you out for dinner and a walk in the park to get your mind off of everything."

"But your head, it's hurting you," she says to me. She's so concerned about me, it makes my whole insides turn but in a good way. I couldn't ask for a more amazing Brittany.

"It's okay, I just need to rest it a little, so what do you say?" I ask her.

"Alright, but only if your heads better after our nap," the seriousness in her voice is so cute.

"Deal." I tell her as I lay down on her bed. She lies on the bed and cuddled up next to me wrapping her arm around my waste and resting her head on my shoulder. I can smell her hair and it smells amazing, like fresh berries, perfect to match her personality. I hold her and lace our fingers together as I feel myself drifting off to sleep. I feel her kiss my cheek warming up my body completely before sleep takes over me completely.

**Let me know what you think of the chapter. Pretty dramatic. Next one will be softer, promise. Tell me if you liked it, I want your thoughts. **

**Also check out my tumblr, you all should! Yes I am promoting myself haha so look at it. graciousriot. Tumblr .com that's the only way I can put it in with all the spaces without it going away :P**


	11. Cookie Dough

**So I re-uploaded this chapter because I realized there were lots of spelling mistakes and stuff. Sorry, I'm like high on Advil cause I injured my knee and have been walking on crutches the whole day. I apologize for my mistakes, so here is the re-uploaded chapter and I also added some stuff. So enjoy! **

**Santana's Point of View**

I woke up with a startle in the night. I kept my eyes tightly shut as I heard the crashing and erupting noises that came from outside, it sounded like giants banging their symbols together up in the sky. The noises make me this of all the weird stories my mami used to tell me when I was younger. She'd tell me all those stories to get me to feel better. Thunder used to be my biggest fear back then but as time went on I barley notice the storms.

The air inside was cold so I cuddled up into my covers, trying to block out the noises and focus on sleeping. Though my eyelids I could see the light flashing every now and then, and shortly after that a huge crack would go off shaking half of the room. This was a big storm, bigger then we've had in a long time. I try to tune out the sounds around me, they're all so loud causing a fucking racket. I wish they'd leave me alone so I could get my beauty sleep on, you know I need some sleep to look this good. There is a reason I like my sleep. I couldn't imagine how I'd look without it.

I breathe in and out and burry my head in my pillow, the volume has gone down but there is still one noise that stands out to me. I notice it's doesn't sound like the other noises that are going on outside, this ones soft almost like a whimper it's coming from inside. No, it's coming from right next to me. My eyes fly open only to witness Brittany curled up in a little ball with her face pressed into me.

Of course, how could I be so stupid to think that the thunder wouldn't wake her up? She's afraid of thunderstorms but obviously thought I was asleep and didn't want to wake me. The sight of her breaks my heart, I hate seeing Brittany afraid, she's such a strong person. Her breathing is heavy and I can feel her shaking against me. I run my hand along her arm catching her attention but her head is still buried into me.

"Britt, baby, it's ok you're safe," I say trying to comfort her but she shakes her head and nuzzles herself closer to me. I wrap my arms around her taking her hand in mine and kiss it softly. "Look it me babe, please."

Slowly her I can see her eyes, her noise, she slowly lifts up her face and looks at me with those sad scared eyes. I kiss her on the forehead telling her she will always be safe within my arms. Her breath is still heavy and her heart is racing against mine, I hate how the thunderstorm has the ability to do this to her. Another crack comes from outside rattling the room so Brittany squeezes me tight, holding onto me.

I feel like hundreds of rocks are hitting the window all at once, the rain it coming down in buckets it would be impossible to fall back asleep in this. The light that flashes outside happen gets stronger and quicker and the thunder is louder then before, I feel like my brain is getting rattled with all the noise. To be honest it's even started to scare me so I clutch Brittany closer to me and begin to stroke the back of her head. Her breath is soft against me but I still feel the shake that rests within her.

"Everything's gonna be alright," I tell her kissing her forehead while holding her close into me. I run my hand over her cheek and kiss it, I can see her face well enough to know that made her smile.

"I want it to stop, will it stop soon?" She whispers out so small I can barley hear her.

"I hope so," I want to tell her it will be over quickly, I want to comfort her but I also don't want to lie to her. I don't know if it will be over soon but I hope for her sake it will be.

I look out the window to see if the storm is letting up when I see a huge bolt of lighting shoot down from the sky hitting a near by tree, not even a second after that the boom from the thunder fills up the whole room, shaking it knocking a book off of my counter. I squeeze my eyes tight trying not to look. A little scream comes from Brittany so I hugged her tighter when I suddenly felt something most against my neck. She was crying, she was so scared she was crying. I needed to hold her tighter, kiss her all over, and make her feel safe.

"What happened?" I don't want to tell her that would only freak her out more.

"Nothing baby, it was just a big crack," she looks at me with an arched eyebrow. I was never the most convincing liar. I sign and kiss her lips. "A tree got struck."

"What?" She asks in a panicky voice.

"Don't worry, we're safe here, the tree was taller then us. It can't get us," that seems to make Brittany feel a little better because she nods her head furiously but something is telling me she's only doing that because she doesn't want to think of the other outcome.

"How are you not more afraid of the storm?" She asked me, I wanted to tell her that I was afraid but someone needed to be the calm one. I needed to be strong, for her.

"I just think of the positive and remember what my Mami used to tell me," I tell her.

"What's that?" She asks holding me tighter. I really like the closeness I am to Brittany even if it's under weird circumstances. With everything that's going on she still smells like fresh strawberries and the feel of her heart beating against mine feels so warm and comforting, if Brittany wasn't here with me I don't think I'd be this calm.

"She told me that it was the giants up in the clouds that were angry because they were hungry so they were banning pots together telling their mum they want food, that's the thunder," she laughed, it felt good to hear her laugh. It was refreshing in a situation like this.

"Where does the lighting come from?" She asks.

"That comes from the giants flicking the lights on and off to get the attention of their mum to make them food" she laughs out loud this time and it brings a smile to my face.

"What did they do that?" She asks while kissing my hand.

"Because they were bad little giants and liked to get all the attention," I told her and she sits up in bed, I join her and all I can do is get lost in her beautiful blue eyes. She leans close and kisses me, I feel a sea of emotions rush up into me. Her lips are so soft they feel like velvet. I kiss her back running my tongue on the bottom of her lip. She immediately grants me access and its nothing like I've ever experienced. I'm sucked in immediately, I can't get enough of her she makes me feel alive.

Suddenly another crack of thunder rattles the whole room and Brittany jumps back in fright. I'm starting to really hate this storm, it's such a cock block. I realize that Brittany's shaking again and I know there is no way anything will happen between us again tonight. An idea pops into my head that might get her mind off of this storm.

"Wanna bake some cookies?" Her eyes are wide as she looks at me surprised.

"At this hour?" She says.

"Yup," I say with a big smile on my face, she laughs and kisses me on the cheek.

"You're such a dork, but I would love to bake some cookies with you," I get out of bed and pull her up with me dragging her to the kitchen spinning her around as we enter. She laughs and I pull her in closer and kiss her on the lips. I taste strawberries again and it makes me smile.

I got out the flower and eggs while Brittany got out the chocolate chips, the sweet ones, not the healthy sugar free ones Quinn has. I don't know why she bothers having those things; every time she eats them she complains that they taste disgusting. It's only Puck that's supportive for her. I was so thankful they both weren't home tonight; they would have heard us making a big racket while making cookies.

Brittany starts to mix all the ingredients together in a bowl, it looks like she's having a little bit of trouble because she's doing her famous pout and it looks so adorable. I go stand next to her looking into the bowl, the dough looks really thick so I decide to add a little bit more water in the mix to help her out.

"Thanks," she tells me.

"You're cute," I say as I reach into the bowl and grab some cookie dough to eat. I love that stuff, I love anything when it's not baked. It's the best time to eat it. I take another bit and another.

"San stop it, there's not going to be any left," she says while she continues mixing the bowl.

"You need to lighten up a little," I say as I reach into the bowl again only to pull out more mix and this time I put it on Brittany's noise and a smile spreads across my face.

"San!" Brittany reaches into the bowl herself and smears some of the mix on my face.

"I did not put that much on you," I say, now I felt all sticky and gross. I like to eat the dough not wear it. I grab a little bit more and spread it on Brittany, she screams and gets more in her hand but this time I run away from her.

"Come back!" She tells me but I don't listen, I keep running.

Brittany chases after me with a big clump of cookie dough in her hand. I turn around to look at her coming after me not focusing on what's in front of me. The next thing I know I hit something hard. I hit a chair and lose my balance, I'm about to fall down when I feel strong arms wrap around me helping me stay up. I cry out in pain, it hurts like a fucking bitch. I end up sitting on the floor but sit with a softer landing because Brittany's there with me. She begins to kiss me on my jaw line which immediately makes me feel better.

"You okay?" She asks and I nod. "Good," she says and then smears the cookie dough that was on her hand onto my face and next.

"Britt!" I cry out but she only giggles. God I love it when she giggles.

"You've got something on your face," I can't help but kiss her. I kiss her everywhere eating the cookie dough off her face. It all tastes so good. I pull her close and run my hands down her back. Our kiss begins to get more heated as her tongue gilds on mine. She give me this energy inside that I feel like I'm on top of the world. Her hand become tangled in my hair as her other hand trails down my back to my butt sending goose bumps down my spine. She makes me feel so alive.

It seems like we both need air because we break the kiss at the same time. I smile at her and pull her into a hug just trying to enjoy the moment.

"Do you hear that?" I ask her.

"Hear what?" She asks me in confusion.

"Exactly. The storms over boo," Brittany listens carefully and then smiles back at me, I know that she's glad its over. So am I, it was really big and normally nothing scares me.

"What about the cookies?" I stand up pulling her up along with me and go back to look in the bowl, I laugh. It's completely empty, and here Brittany was telling me that I shouldn't waste the dough. She comes to my side and looks at the empty bowl and begins to laugh. I love her laugh, it could light up the whole world.

"I guess we're not making cookies anymore," she shakes her head. "Bed?"

"That's a good idea," she tells me while yawing. It's late, really late, like three in the morning late but I guess that could also be considered early.

I snuggle back up to Brittany and kiss her goodnight, we immediately fall into a good sleep tightly hugging each other. I could fall asleep like this forever.

00000000000000000

The last time I had seen Brittany was the night of the thunderstorm. She had a bunch of assignments to finish up so I decided to give her some space to finish them. As much as I didn't like staying away from her for that amount of time it gave me some time to think and catch up on the schoolwork I had fallen behind on.

I had been at the library all day writing up a story for my creative writing class. It took me a hell of a long time but it was officially done, all edited and written to my level. It was a love romance about a boy and girl and how they had met each other in the worst of times but still managed to stay strong and fall in love with each other. I based that off Brittany's relationship with me, she inspires me.

Since it was late I figured I'd check my phone to see if I missed anything important, there was a missed text from Brittany telling me she was in the writers help center getting her essay checked and wouldn't be able to meet me tonight, she added many sad faces to that. I could only imagine her little pout when she sent the text, just that thought alone made me smile. It's funny how Brittany has that affect on me, I would have never thought that I'd find someone as perfect as her.

My house was a little far to walk to at this time of the night so I decided it would be best if I were to take the us back to my place. Normally I'd call Puck or Quinn to pick me up but they were on a date tonight and I really didn't want to disturb them. They had spent forever trying to pretend they didn't have feelings for each other and I'm happy they finally decided to admit it and are now dating.

A man rubbing his noise and sniffing up his snot sat on the bench waiting for the bus to come, at the moment he was the only company I had. I would much rather be alone then listening to some old guy with hair coming out his ears sniff and cough his mucus up. I was so disgusted by this it was making me gag.

While I waited for the bus to come I saw a little figure off in the distance coming towards the bus stop. They were short and had long dark hair from what I could make out. The light flickered above them and their footsteps were loud and obnoxious. I looked harder at the person and slowly their facial detail came into view. Tina, fucking Tina was coming towards me. This night just got a whole lot worse.

"Well this is a nice surprise," Tina said to me sarcastically giving me one of her sly smiles. I really don't know why Brittany bothers with this bitch, she's nothing but evil. I can see the evil radiating off of her. I guess she's Brittany's 'friend' but she honestly could do much better.

"You don't talk to me and I won't talk to you and we'll get along fine," I tell her. I really don't feel like having a battle with her tonight, I'm tired and cold and just want to get back home and snuggle in my bed.

"But I want to talk to you," I look at her with a surprised unamuzed expression on my face. I seeing into the future and I know that this was not going to turn out good.

"That's great," she smiles at me again; it's a creepy smile. I hate how her face looks.

"I don't like you hanging out with Brittany, it's bad for her and you don't deserve to have a friendship with her. You're rude, bitchy, snobby and a slut. I don't want you're ways influencing her in any way," was this bitch serious! I really didn't want to get started with her but now she was leaving me no choice.

"Listen here bitch, my friendship with Brittany is none of your concern. If anyone should not be hanging out with Brittany it's you but I am a decent enough person to let Brittany pick her friends for herself. That's her decision even though I think she's making a horrible one with you. She is old enough to make her own choices and if you ever call me a slut again I will ends you! Understand that fucker?" I was on a role, I felt all fired up inside ready to pounce. I'm from Lima Heights Adjacent and over there we do not do things nicely.

"I'm only calling you a slut because you are one! There you were sleeping with the whole school while your poor boyfriend is clueless," Tina was getting on my last nerve.

"You don't know shit! You know what went on back then, rumors and I've you're too stupid to actually listen to them then that's not my problem," the weird sick coughing guy was looking at us intensely interested in what we had to say, it was the only thing I found amusing about this conversation.

"Fucking stop staring at us!" Tina snapped at the man.

"Leave him alone, he's only staring cause we're causing a scene," she doesn't look too impressed but the man smiles as I stick up for him.

"You're the one causing the scene!" Now she's really making me lose it.

"Right, everything's always my fault," I say sarcastically.

"Exactly, so if you could be kind for once, even though I know that's so hard for you I want you to stop hanging out with Brittany," Tina said getting really close to me trying to make her point.

"Brittany is my friend, she can hang out with whoever she wants and a bitch like you isn't going to stop her and I should be the one to tell you to stop. Stop setting her up on dates she doesn't want to go on. Stop setting her up with ass holes! She will date on her own time, let her be!" I want to tell her everything, I want to say that she's already taken with someone that cares about her so much but I can't. I care too much about Brittany, she will tell her on her own time.

Brittany deserves the best, after everything she's been though in her high school years she only deserves the best, someone who will take care of her and listen to her every word. Sometimes I don't even think I'm good for her. She makes me a better person and means everything to me. She's so smart and beautiful; I'm so lucky to have her in my life.

She doesn't deserve someone like Tina making up her life for her. She's everything that's good in this world and if Tina doesn't see that then there's something seriously wrong with her. The way Brittany's eyes light up when she laughs or when her noise scrunches up when she's in deep thought is the cutest things in the world that could brighten up anyone's day. She's perfect in everyway and doesn't deserve to go through what Tina is throwing at her.

Tina's noise is flaring up, it's not a pretty sight. I can now remember why I used to pick on her in high school I could always tell who the mean people would turn out to be, that's why I picked on them, except for Brittany. If I could take back everything I did to her then I would. I was stupid back then, stupid for holding back my feelings and letting my anger get the better of me. I hate how I hid my emotions and bitched at Brittany just because I was to scared to face my feelings for her.

Maybe if I hadn't been so stupid in high school I could have started dating her sooner but I'm happy that she's in my life now. I'm happy Brittany has Rachel, as annoying as she is I'd munch rather be around her then Tina and Rachel does seem to take good care of Brittany. I should thank her for that. I'm glad that Rachel came to the school after I left, I don't want anyone else to remember me for who I used to be. I changed a lot and I'm happy for that.

I hate who I used to be, I was a bitch, I still am a bitch but I've learnt to control myself better now. I hated how I lied to myself and kept everything inside me, I should have just accepted who I was but what I will admit is that I'm better then Tina. I would have given Tina a second chance if she didn't do all that shit to Brittany. I don't know how she puts up with her but that's what's great about Brittany, she see's the good inside of people even when the rest of the world can't.

She's great about that but I just wish she could see who Tina really is, she's hurting Brittany and I don't like it. Who knows what that guy would have done to B if I wasn't there to send him away. I don't want her to get hurt, she's innocent and doesn't deserve any of that.

The old guy sitting on the bench blew his noise in his sleeve which was a sight I did not want to see, I looked at his pocket and saw he had a tissue hanging out of it so I really don't know why he didn't use that. He was still watching us intensely, but I guess I don't blame him, we are causing quiet a scene and what else do you do while waiting for the bus.

"Brittany needs someone in her life! You know her, you know how stupid she is and clearly can't take care of herself, she's an idiot and she..." Tina didn't get to finish her sentence; my hand met her face leaving a giant red mark on it. I was pleased with myself. Tina held her face crying out in pain.

"Never call Brittany an idiot or stupid! She's not and if you think that then you clearly don't know anything about her," I was fuming with anger, the nerve of this bitch calling Brittany stupid.

"Oh fuck you," she says to me but thankfully the bus pulls up then preventing her from saying anything more. I feel that I would have completely lost it.

I decide that I don't want to be on the bus with Tina, which would be too risky, I would probably start something up with her. I decided to walk home instead or take a cab or something. Anything would be better then sitting in a tiny space with that bitch. I couldn't believe what she said about Brittany, that girl doesn't deserve her as a friend.

"Watch out Lopez, you'll get fucked over so hard one day," she calls back too me so I hold up my hand and flip her off, I hear her scoff in the background and I can't help but smile because I know I got to her.

That night was a ruff one, I kept tossing and turning in my bed un able to sleep. The time seemed to be going by buy really fast and here I was lying in my bed un able to sleep. I decided to give up on trying to sleep so I got up and went to the kitchen to get some water. Water always helped me fall asleep when I was little so I figured I might as well try it again and maybe something good will come out of it.

I got a glass from the counter and poured me some water chugging it down. Suddenly I heard something fall on the floor across from me and I looked up startled. Quinn stood in front of me with a weird expression on her face. I stared at her.

"What are you doing up?" I asked her.

"I needed to pee," I laugh, leave it to Quinn to give me the most straight forward answer.

"How was your date," but I immediately knew the answer once I saw the big smile that spreads across her face . I'm happy for her she deserves it. "If it went that good then why did you have a weird look on your face before?"

"I have to meet with some freshmen tomorrow, and I was just thinking about it. I need to help her with some musical thing in order to pass my class," she looks totally unamuzed to be helping this person.

"You know not all freshmen are bad," I tell her.

"I'm pretty sure Brittany's the only exception," Quinn says with a smirk on her face. I blush at her comment, just the mention of her name can make me blush. "You're so whipped." It was true, I am.

"What's her name?" I ask trying to change the subject from causing me more embarrassment.

"Rachel," Rachel as is Brittany's friend Rachel? I wonder, but I know there are probably many freshmen named Rachel that go to this school, there's no way it's the same Rachel. I'll ask Brittany about it tomorrow, it would be funny if she was help out man hands.

"Well try and be nice," I know Quinn will be, if anything's it's her who's usually telling me to be nice.

"Yeah, I'm going to sleep though, good night," she says as she heads back to the bedroom, then I notice something... that's not her bedroom.

"Isn't that your bedroom," I point to the bedroom down at the end of the hall, she smiles at me and I know exactly what is happening here. She's going to Pucks bedroom, she's spending the night there. They are so cute together but I'm glad that I didn't hear anything that happened that night.

"Yup," she gives me one more smile back and heads into his bedroom.

I suddenly get a text from Brittany.

**Brittany: Are you up? I need u. **

**Santana: What's wrong babe? B there soon.**

**Brittany: Everything **

And just like that my heart dropped.

**So what did you think? What's wrong with Brittany? Let me know what you thought.**


	12. I'll Travel Back For You

I raced to Brittany's door room as fast as I could. I didn't care that I left the door open to Quinn, Puck and my apartment and that it was very late at night I just ran out there as fast as I could. I needed to get to Brittany. I needed to know what was wrong with her. Come to think of it I probably should have closed the door, I know that Quinn would flip shit on me the next day, but this was an emergency, I'd fine my way out of it, I always do.

I made my way into Brittany's residence, like I have done many times, except this time felt different, more serious. I walked right up to her door and was about to knock on it when the door burst open and Brittany shot out, flinging her arms around me, holding onto to me tight. She was sobbing into my shoulder, it broke my heart to see her like this.

I held onto her tight letting herself burry into me. I didn't say anything, I just held her and ran my hand through her hair trying to sooth her. When Brittany cries it crushes me, I try the best to make her feel better but sometimes that's not enough and that breaks my heart. I want to be there for her, I want to be the person that always cheers her up and make sure she's alright. She stops crying and looks up at me with her big blue sad eyes. I whip the tears away that are still on her cheek and move in to kiss her forehead. She hugs me again and says muffled words that I can't quite understand.

"What was that?" I ask her sweetly hoping she will be a little louder. She looks all shaken up and broken like a little kid that just found out Santa's not real.

"I have t-to, go b-back," she started to cry again and I immediately held her tight, kissing her cheek and noise trying to get her to feel better. I was confused, I didn't understand what she was trying to tell me and I really didn't feel like having a deep conversation in the middle of the hallway.

I took her hand and led her back into her room, sitting on her bed opening my arms for Brittany to snuggle into. She was so shaken up so I pulled the blanket over us to keep her warm as I rubbed her back trying to calm her down. It made me feel sick to see her in this state. I missed her laugh, her light up blue eyes, her smile that makes my heart melt into a huge puddle when I see it I want happy Brittany back.

"I-I have to g-go back," Brittany repeats again and this time I know I heard her clearly. I wasn't too sure the first time she said it but now I know.

"Go back where?" I ask her, I couldn't be more confused then I am.

"Lima, I have to go back, I have to go now," suddenly Brittany shot up from the bed and ran in her closet grabbing some clothes. She started sobbing again and was trying to do everything from behind her tears. I quickly got up to go after her, she clearly wasn't thinking straight.

Brittany got her backpack and stuffed some clothes into it, she ran back into her closet to get more clothes when she tripped over some textbooks lying around. When she landed on the ground she began to cry harder, I didn't miss any time as I went over to her and scooped her in my arms and held her tight. She was crying so hard that she began to cough.

Each breath she took was shaky. With all her might I saw her try to stand up again but her knees were weak and barley let her. I saw her fight through it, she was wrong and then she went back to pack more clothes in her backpack.

She wasn't stable at the moment, I couldn't let her get up incase she hurt herself again, I could see that her knee's were all scuffed up from the fall and her hands had scratches on them. I got up to hold her again, I tried to rub her back to calm her down but she was fighting me, she wanted to get up to pack more clothes. I wrapped my arms around her to hold her in place but she was strong. Brittany twists and turned and tried to push me away to get more clothes to pack.

"Britt please, calm down," she didn't listen to me, she kept moving around trying to get up. Tears streamed down her face as she tried to push me off of her.

"No, I got to go!" She raised her voice at me, which made me, back off, I had never seen her like this. I wanted to help but I didn't know how. She was pushing me away, I didn't know what was going on. She grabbed her sweater off of her shelf and after that I heard a huge crash. It made me jump up, I looked at Brittany and saw that she was on the floor, holding a broken picture frame.

I went towards her to help her clean it up. I got closer to her putting my hands on her shoulders trying to let her know that I was here for her, then she did something I didn't expect in the slightest. She whipped her head around and completely snapped.

"Go away! I don't need your help!" She yelled at me and pushed me off of her. I could tell how broken she was, but this attitude had me a little frightened.

"Britt please, just relax first, let talk ok," I said in the most calming voice ever.

"I don't need your fucking help, now get out!" I was surprised, never have I heard Brittany swear before but as much as I wanted to help her I couldn't help but feel hurt and mad all at the same time. Here I was trying my hardest to be there for her and she was just pushing me away.

"Stop it, stop pushing me away, I'm trying to help," I didn't mean to but I rose my voice at her which only made her get more upset, I could feel tears starting to come up but I wouldn't let them show, I was stronger than that.

"Just go ok! I don't need your help," she told me as she tried to pick up the pieces of the broken picture frame.

"Britt," was all I could say to her.

"No! I said go god dammit! Just go!"

"Fine whatever! If you don't need me I'll go," I didn't want to leave her but I was mad and if she didn't want me around then I would go. I didn't want this to turn into a really big fight.

"Good!" She screamed back at me.

"Fine!" I opened the door and slammed it behind me, I was fuming with anger, she could be so difficult sometimes. Here I was just trying to help and now she didn't care at all. She was the one that texted me this late in the night and after all that she never wanted me.

I still don't leave, I stop outside her door and just listen, I can hear her muffled crying through the door, she's pounding on the floor now and I can't stand the sound. I hear her coughing and crying and taking deep breaths to try and get air back inside her. I remember the time I found her in the washroom after being slushied. She was covered in red slushy and crying so hard, the sight of it broke my heart but if I broke down or anyone saw me I would be dead.

I did one thing good in my high school life and that happened on that day. I quickly checked underneath the stalls of the washroom to see if anyone was there, once I knew if was safe I took some paper towel, dapped it with water and began cleaning her face. The slushy that was in her eye was the only thing that kept her from seeing me.

Once everything was clean I quickly took out an extra top I had in my backpack and gave it to her to where and then I rushed out of there before she or anyone else could see me. To this day Brittany still doesn't know that was me. I felt like this was a time to pull up my big girl pants again and help her. I never liked seeing a sad Brittany and I still don't to this day. I heard her crying out and slowly her words became clear to me.

"No, don't go," I hear her say really quietly like she expects nobody else to hear but I do. "Santana." She says really quiet again. I hear her cry again, but this time is different, this time she's crying out for me. I know she didn't want me to leave so slowly I open her door again and see her curled up on the floor crying.

"I'm here Britt," she looks up at me so broken and slowly gets up, moving towards me. Her legs are shaking; she barley has any energy in her. I got towards her and help her stay up, and together we move to the bed. Once again I hold her, making sure she's safe.

"I'm sorry," she says very quickly as she curls up into my side. "I'm so sorry I yelled."

"I know, I know baby. Do you want to tell me what's wrong now?" I nods her head slowly.

"My sister, she's been in the hospital and she's getting worse. My mum has been texting me updating me on her situation. She just called, the doctors don't think she gonna make it," this broke my heart. I know how much Brittany cares for her family and this is tearing my heart apart.

"I'm so sorry," I hold her tight.

"I have to see her," she told me in a quiet voice, I could tell she was starting the fall asleep from all the crying she had done earlier so I held her closer to me.

"I know," I kissed her lightly as she slowly fell asleep.

That morning when I woke up, Brittany was wrapped up in me, her legs were between mine and my arms were holding her tightly as her head was underneath my neck with her hair draped over her face. I moved my hand slowly, hoping I wouldn't wake her up and gently moved the hair that was covering her face behind her ear. My heart sunk once the hair had been removed, her face was still red and puffy from the night before and her skin looked dull and pale.

I gently stroked her cheek trying not to wake her up, she didn't need any more things to worry about. Sleep was always the best thing to have in situations like these and I intend on making sure she's alright. She looked so calm sleeping, I didn't want to wake her up and jeopardize that.

She started to stir and shortly after that began to open her eyes. I could tell she still felt sad, her eyes were all red and puffy from crying last night and when she opened her eyes wide enough I saw her blue eyes had turned into dark black orbs that were lifeless, her whole face looked drained. I had never seen her look so broken before, so I did the only thing I could, I scooped her up in my arms and just held her. She wrapped her arms around my neck and held me.

As she looked up at me I could tell she wasn't herself, she didn't smile she just looked down again at the covers and pulled them up to her head and snuggled closer into me. I kissed the top of her head as I held her, that's all I could do at this point, all I could do is be there for her. I knew she had to go home as soon as she could and I would help her get there. We were both short on money but if we pulled together I think that we could get her there.

"San?" Brittany asked me in a small voice, I could barley hear her, her voice sounded dead like everything in the world had ended. It broke my heart apart to know she was going through this much pain. I hummed letting her know she should continue. "I need to go."

"I'll drive you to the airport," I started to get up from the bed but I was suddenly stopped when I felt Brittany's hand reach around my arm and hold me. I looked back at her and her eyes had turned from pain to fear. She was scared, I felt my heart ach.

"What if she doesn't make it? I don't know what to do without her," I helped Brittany up and held onto her hands.

"Don't think about that now, just hold on to what's good and if anything happens I'm just a phone call away ok? If you need me just call," she nodded her head furiously and gave me a light kiss.

"Thank you," she said holding me tighter. "I wish you could come though," I wished I could go with her too but we both know I can't.

"We only have money for you, you have to be strong ok. I know you can be so strong and fearless," I said lifting her head to look at me in the eyes. I nodded her head again but this time more unsure then the first time. "You are smart and so strong Britt, that's what makes you so amazing."

"You always know what to say," she makes me smile, she always makes me smile, I pull her close and kiss her with all the passion I have.

"Come on," I say helping her up from the bed. We both get dressed and get in my car.

The drive to the airport was quiet, Brittany's looking out the window watching the scenery as we drive by. I can tell her mind is racing right now, I want to be there for her and tell her everything will be fine but I don't know that. I hate that I can't make her feel better right now. I hate that I can't go with her and make sure she's ok.

I help her out of the car and we make our way over to the check in desk in silence, I hold onto her hand and squeeze it to give her some reassurance that I'll be there for her and that she can do it. She glances over at me and gives me a weak smile, I smile back at her but it's not a happy smile its one of those 'I believe in you' smiles. Once we reach the gate I know I have to let her go and face this on her own. It's tarring me apart inside but there's nothing I can do about it.

I hand her, her bag but instantly she puts it down and throws her arms around me giving me a big hug. It almost makes me lose my balance but I quickly regain it and hug her back. She rests her head on my shoulder and I can hear her start to cry again. I squeeze her tighter letting her know she's not loosing me.

"You take care ok, I'll be here when you get back," I tell her and she nods her head. I take my thumb and gently whip away the tears from her eyes and put her hair back behind her ear.

"I'll miss you," she tells me and I couldn't agree more.

"I'll miss you too. Tell me when you get there," I want to know she arrived safely and is going to be ok. I'm crushed that I can't go there and keep her safe but I know that once she's with her family they'll be able to help each other out.

"I will, thanks. For everything," I smiled at her and then cupped her cheek in my hand, leaning forward kissing her one last time before she goes. I know it's not forever but I still can't help but feel sad that she's leaving for a couple of days. No one to cuddle with or to kiss or hold.

**Brittany's Point of View**

I was so screwed up at the moment, I could feel my tears wanting to come out the whole plane ride there. I wish Santana was with me, holding me, telling me everything would be alright, she always makes me feel better no matter what. I miss her already. She was so caring and helpful last night, normally people wouldn't put up with everything that was going on in my life. I'm so thankful for her.

When she was holding me, trying to get me to calm down even after I kicked her out of my room, I was so grateful she came back. She never left me and she came back and held me tightly until I fell asleep. In that moment I felt something that I've never felt with anyone before, in that moment I knew I loved her. I do love her, so much. She means everything to me, she's the best thing that ever happened. I'm so grateful for her.

The plane ride wasn't that great, there was a lot of turbulence and the person next to me kept coughing and sneezing without covering their mouth, it was really gross. I felt so tired and drained but my body wouldn't let me sleep it just kept feeling the need to cry. I didn't want to be weak, I didn't want to show people around me that I was sad. Santana told me I was a strong person but I'm really not to sure about that. I feel weak, I feel like at any moment I could break down again.

I knew this day would come but I wasn't ready for it. My sister had been battling an illness for a long time now, she started getting better a some months ago but suddenly it relapsed and got worse. The doctor said that she may not last that long, she was lucky to live a month from that day. Since he told us that she's been living three months extra, I had so much hope that she would make it though but since I got that text for my mum I know that might not be the case.

My sister means so much to me, I remember when we were kids we used to dress up in superhero costumes and fly around the house pretending to save the world from evil. She was only two years younger than me so she practically knew everything in my life. She was the only one who knew I liked Santana back in high school. I could count on her for everything. I told her about my first kiss and my first date, and she was the first person I came out too, we were so close, I'm not read to let that go.

There was a time that she got her heart broken by some horrible guy and we sat on the couch eating ice cream and cookies for the weekend while watching all the Disney movies. We laughed and talked, and I felt so good for making her feel better. Now I feel hopeless that I can't help her out. I just have to watch her suffer and I can't do that.

The day that my sister found out that she had the illness was the worst day ever. I remember lots of tears from the whole family, I remember all the hoping and praying that went on. She's still young, I want her to experience the world and see things, she has her whole life ahead of her.

I get my bags and head out the glass door looking for my mum. I text her saying I was here right after I texted Santana telling her I got here safely. When she text be back I already felt safe, just listening to her voice or hearing her words makes me feel better. I'm so lucky to have her in my life, I'm so happy I let myself be happy and started to date her. As I walked out from behind the glass door I saw my mum waiting for me, she looked just as broken as I was.

I made my way over towards her and greeted her with a big hug. I didn't realize it until I touched my cheek but I had started crying, I looked up at her and saw that she too had tears in her eyes. This was going to be a hard day. She picked up my bad and motioned for me to follow her.

"Mum?" I asked her softly, I didn't like that she hadn't said anything yet, I needed to know how she was.

"She's holding on, but I don't know for how long." My mum looked so sad, I wanted to hug her again but I knew that if I did I would break down into tears and I couldn't let that happen, not yet anyway.

"What did the doctor say?" I asked, I wanted to know if there was any hope.

"There's one more operation we could do, but the doctors aren't guaranteeing it," was she trying to say that she won't do it? I needed hope, this was hope and we had to take it.

"We have to give it a try! It could save her life!" I couldn't help that I rose my voice, my emotions were everywhere right now, I was having a hard time controlling them.

"I know, I know and we will, but just in case Julia wanted to see you," I want to see her too, I want to hug her and tell her everything like we used to. Ever since we found out that she had the illness we have been distant from each other, I guess we did it because we thought it wouldn't hurt that much but it just hurts more.

"Where's dad?" I ask, he always comes to visit me.

"With Julia," I nod understanding, it's good she isn't there alone. I know she never liked hospitals.

"Can we go there now?" My mum nods her head.

The hospital was cold and smelt of death, I really hate hospitals, its one of the many things my sister and I have in common. I make my way down the long cold hallways passing many doors that look the same. I look into one room and see an elderly woman sleeping, I think she just had an operation or something because there are many cards and flowers by her bed side table and crutches near the door.

As I approach my sisters door I feel my heart drop in my stomach, I'm so scared and I feel the tears welling up in my eyes ready to come out. I feel sick to my stomach and feel a huge lump in my throat. I hate it, I hate everything. I know I have to be strong, if not for me then for my sister. I have to pull it together and visit her.

My mum takes my hand and leads me into the room, when I enter I feel sicker then I ever have. My sisters lying there hooked up to a bunch of cables and wires looking very pale. Seeing her like this brings tears to my eyes, I have only seen her with rosy cheeks and a smile that lights up the room. My dad was sitting in a chair beside her holding onto her hand. My sister looks up and smiles and me, I feel the tears creep up on me again but I try my best to hold them in.

"We'll give you two some space," my dad said as he got up from his chair, took my mothers hand and went out the room. I felt more nervous as ever now because it means I have to talk. It means I have to face everything that's in front of me. I love her so much, but I scared.

"Hey," I say, that's as much as I can get out.

"Hey," she says to me weakly and it breaks my heart. "I'm glad you came, I missed you." I take her hand and kiss it letting her know that I'll never leave her and that's she'll always be my little sis.

"I missed you too, so much," I can feel the tears start to come again and this time I don't do a good job of holding them back because I let one slip out and fall down my cheek. My sister see's this and whips it away for me, I close my eyes at her touch because I can't bare to think of ever loosing her.

"Don't cry ok. Please. I just want to have a normal conversation," she's younger than me but I feel like she is the older more mature one in the family.

"Yeah, of course," anything to make her happy.

"What's knew with you? How's university?" She always liked hearing about my life.

"It's good, I like it a lot. It's so different from high school and everyone's been super nice and friendly, I've met some really nice people," I think of Santana as I'm talking and can't help but let out of big grin, my sister see's this obviously and smiles at it. I know she's not stupid, she'll figure it out.

"What's that big smile? You met nice people or someone special," she smiling at me now and for once I feel like it's back to the old days where we can share anything to each other.

"You remember that girl Santana, I told you about in high school? That I had a huge crush on but she was really mean?" Julia nods her head remembering. "Well I met her again, she goes there and turns out she was mean to me because she wanted to hid the fact that she liked me but now she felt so bad for it and is a changed person," my sister was staring at me waiting for more. She hates when I leave her hanging.

"And..." she asked me with a huge grin on her face.

"And now, she's my girlfriend," my sister squealed making me break out into a big smile.

"I'm so happy for you," she said as I leaned in to hug her. I love my sister so much, I can count on her for everything. She's my best friend and I love her so much. "That's so cute! But she better not hurt you." My sister says with a serious tone.

"No never, she's the sweetest ever and I love her so much," I can't help but smile when I say that out loud. I love Santana. I love her so much.

"Awww, my sisters in love," I smile at that because it's so true. "Britty?"

"Yeah?" I say.

"I'm glad your happy, and I want you to stay happy ok, even if I go," I look into her eyes and shake my head, she was not saying this now. I couldn't deal with this, I didn't want to believe it.

"No, no don't talk like that. You're going to be alright." I said shaking me head to get the thought out of it.

"Just promise me you'll be okay, and know that I love you," I nod my head but my eyes are now filled with tears and I hold tighter onto Julia's hand. I can't see her go, I love her way too much, she means everything to me. I look at the time I know it's almost time for her operation. The operation that could determine the faith of her life so I kiss her on her head and smile at her.

This is the longest hour of my life, I can't sit still I can't do anything right now. I need to know if she's ok. I stand up and walk around but a few seconds later I sit down again only to stand up and walk around. My dad senses that I'm uncomfortable and makes his way over to sit beside me. He wraps me up in a big hug and kisses my head. I hold onto him and hope that she'll be alright.

Suddenly I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket and pull out my phone. It's a text message from Santana asking me how everything is going and if I'm ok. She's asking me if she needs to sneak on a plane and fly down here for me. She makes me smile, I know she's kidding about sneaking on a plane but she the though about her caring that much makes me smile which doesn't go unnoticed by my dad.

"Special girl?" He asks me.

"Yeah," I say.

"What's her name?" My dad was always the noisy one, but I really don't mind, when it comes to Santana I can't really shut up about her but I just don't want her to know that.

"Santana," I say smiling.

"Very nice, is she treating you good?

"The best. She stayed with me last night and put up with all my crying and everything after mum texting me. She's really sweet and I'm so happy to have her."

"She sounds like a wonderful person," it makes me really happy to hear that from my dad, both are a big part of my life and I would hate it if my dad didn't approve.

"She is," I tell him.

"I'm glad you have someone back at university to take care of you. Just let me know if she ever hurts you because I will kick her ass," I laugh at that, my dad wouldn't hurt a fly.

"Dad," I say with a laugh.

"I'm just saying, no one hurts my little girl," he's always there to protect me and that's what I love about him.

I quickly shot Santana a text message back.

**BRITTANY: Everything's good for now, my sister just went in for her operation so we're waiting to see if anything happens. Thanks for everything. **

I instantly get a text message from her back.

**SANTANA: I'm always here for you okay. Good luck, I hope everything turns out well. **

Just then I see the doctor walking out with his clipboard, I really always hated those things. Even in all the doctor shows on TV they always carried the clipboards everywhere and when they talked to the patients families it always had the good or bad new on them. They make me nervous. It all comes down to this.

He walked up to my mum and my dad got up to stand with her, I stayed in my seat and waited, I couldn't hear the news first hand. I couldn't deal with it, I wanted everything to be okay. I needed everything to be alright.

I could see the doctor talking to my parents, but I was too far away to figure out what he was saying, I just waited for the news, waited for the world to come crashing down on me. I couldn't help but think of the worse, think of that my sister was behind that door not breathing but covered in a white sheet. I tried to shake that image out of my head but I knew that it could happen, that I should prepare myself.

I looked up at my parents to see the doctor give them one more piece of information. Then I saw my mothers hand shoot up to her mouth and the tears fall out of her eyes. That was it.

**So we finally figure out who those myserty texts were coming from and why they made Brittany so sad. What do you think happens to her sister? Did you like that chapter? Let me know. **

**I know going to make this a happy chapter because of the Brittana break up WHICH I HATED! SO MUCH! But it didn't really fit with the story to yea. Sorry for another sad thing and just fyi BRITTANA IS ENDGAME AND THEY WILL GET BACK TOGETHER! **


	13. It's Just you, It's Always Been You

I stepped out of the cab making my way to my door room still in a daze from the information that I had leant a few days ago. I couldn't believe it, it didn't seem real, nothing did at this point. I noticed I had let a few tears roll down my cheeks so I quickly whipped them away before anyone noticed my tears. I picked up my bags and made my way to my room. I felt like everything was moving so quickly.

As I reached the door to my room I struggled to find my eyes, they were somewhere deep inside my bag and I was having trouble finding them. Once I finally got them I opened the door only to see Santana waiting for me on my bed. She sat up straighter looking at me with a worried expression. My phone had broken a few hours after my sisters surgery from me throwing at the wall and I hadn't been able to replace it yet. I managed to email Santana but I wasn't sure if she got it because I hadn't had the time to check, I was busy with my family.

I put down my bags and continued to stair at Santana. Rachel must have let her in before she went of to class, I was thankful for that, I needed Santana, and I missed her. She got up and wrapped me up in a big hug and then I let the tears flow, it felt good to let them out. It felt good to hold Santana, everything felt right.

"She made it, she's alive!" I said as happy as I could. I couldn't believe it when my mum told me the news that my sister had made it out of the surgery and was going to make a full recovery. That was the best day ever. Santana hugged me tighter and kissed me on the cheek.

"I'm so happy for you! I told you everything would be okay," I kissed her hard of the lips and had so many feelings come rushing into me. Kissing Santana made me feel home, safe it gave me hope every time I kissed her lips.

"Thank you, for everything," I said to her, as I looked her in her bright brown shining eyes. She then kissed me on my forehead, I loved how she always seemed happy for when I said anything to her.

"I'll always be here for you ok," Santana said.

"And I'm sorry, for not calling you and stuff," I said to her looking at the floor.

"Don't worry about it, your phone broke, not your fault," she said as she kissed my lips.

"Thanks." I tell her.

"I'm glad everything is okay," She tells me and it makes me smile.

"Me too," I say as she kisses me again.

I loved her kisses. I felt so safe and at home with her at my side. Her tongue ran across my lips until I parted them, her tongue skated across mine and caused me to moan. I then wrapped my hands around her neck pulling her closer as she wriggled as I continued to pull her in closer to me. I was starting to lose my breath but nothing was better then Santana, I wanted more of her, I needed more of her.

My heart was beating rapidly that I thought it would pop out of my chest, I felt my breathes get heavier needing to suck in air. As she pressed her whole body against me and I tangled my fingers into her hair. She was so hot. I struggled to gain dominance in the kiss, but then Santana shifted, pressing her leg between my thighs, and I whimpered at that. She smirked, delving her tongue deeper into my mouth as her hands worked her way down against my sides and eventually rested on my thighs.

She then broke the kiss to move to my jaw placing little kisses there. Her tongue felt soft and smooth against my skin, she then eventually found her way down to my neck and began to interchange between kisses, soft little bites and sucking. She felt so good against my skin I felt dizzy and if it wasn't for her holding me up my legs would probably give out. I couldn't help but moan against her touch, and as I did I felt her smile against my skin. My breathing got heavier each time and I felt the wetness between my legs grow stronger.

"Santana!" My gasp was muffled by her lips. Her hands drew up to my face, pulling me in closer. I couldn't contain myself for much longer, I needed her desperately. I felt her moan against my mouth as we continued to kiss and knew she needed me as much as I needed her at this moment.

I felt my legs hit the back of my bed and realized that she had moved us from the door over here. I ran my fingers down her sides to the bottom of her shirt slowly reaching inside so I was touching her bare skin. I felt her shutter against me. I wanted to rip her clothes off of her but still I was scared, I opened my eyes wearily to meet her glowing eyes. She looked at me so frustrated, she looked so cute.

She looked back at me giving me the permission I needed to continue so slowly I bought her shirt up over her head and admired her beautiful toned body. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her, she was so perfect, so beautiful, I don't know how I got so lucky. She rose her hand up to my chin and smiled at me, then continued to pull me back into a kiss which instantly began to heat up again. I ran my fingers over her shoulders, stomach, everywhere enjoying the new contact.

I then began to get too hot for myself, I needed to take everything off. Santana obeyed and helped me take my shirt off only breaking the kiss for a second. Feelings her roaming her hands all over my body made me groan, she felt so good. I moved to her neck kissing and sucking on it leaving my mark.

"You are so beautiful," she said to me making my heart flutter even more. I sat down on the bed quickly moving my way up to the top as she followed and continued to kiss me. I didn't know when she did it but I then found that my button to my jeans were unbuttoned and were beginning to come off me. I raised my hips helping Santana get the extra clothes off me as quick as possible. She then quickly continued to rip off her jeans and craw back on top of me.

I pressed my hands into her back so that I could feel her chest against mine. Her heart was beating so hard and fast, she then tried to press harder into me but I flipped us around first so now I was on top. I looked at her taking in her gorgeous body, I rose my hand brushing a stand of hair off her face and behind her ear.

I then went back to kissing her neck, letting my tongue trace circles on her skin. I pulled my tongue back in my mouth and then gently nibbled just below her ear when I heard her let out a small moan, I smiled and continue to nibble. I went back to kissing her, as I trailed my hand up her side. She was pressing her thigh between my legs which cause me to let out a gasp, I then saw her smile and go back to kissing me.

"Britt please," she managed to get out. "I need you." I slowly went back to kissing and sucking her on her neck where her spot was as I lowered my hand. As I slowly slipped my hand under her underwear I added a little bit of pressure cause her to raise her hips a little, rocking her leg up against me. I kissed and sucked on her neck feeling her soft skin there. I then started moving my fingers in a circular motion, and she let out a louder moan so I slowly and cautiously let a second finger slid into her.

"Babe!" She called out. I held her close and kept moving her fingers, in and out. She started to move her hips faster against me and I realized I was rocking with her. It didn't take very long for the pleasure to build up from the friction of my fingers. We both were breathing heavily, she felt amazing and she was all mine.

"Fuck Britt!" She called out as I helped her ride the rest of her organism. I looked into her deep brown eyes and she smiled back at me. She then raised her hand to my cheek and pulled me down, kissing my forehead, and then made her way to my lips.

"You are amazing," she told me, she was so cute and sexy so I kissed her again. She made everything feel so amazing.

"You're the amazing one," I told her. "Was I okay?" I asked a little unsure of myself.

"You were perfect, you are prefect," she said giving me the biggest hug. I cared about her so much, I knew I loved her but I still wasn't sure is Santana felt the same way so I decided to keep quiet for now.

We stayed cuddled up for a little while, she held me tight to her chest and I couldn't help but think it would explode at any moment with all the Santana I got today. Her skin was so soft, every touch felt so good and lying on her right now with this skin on skin contact felt unreal. I finally got Santana, and she was my everything.

We must have fallen into a quick sleep because I got started awake when I heard Santana's phone start to ring from the corner of her room. I felt her shift as she reached out the grab it, she was trying to be carful around me, I think she thought I was still asleep. I let her think that as I moved closer to her and felt her, I heard her chuckle and start playing with my hair. She then picked up her phone to keep me from waking up.

"Hello?" She said in a whisper. " No I'm kind of busy right now. Can I talk to you later?" She asked. "Great, bye." She placed the phone back on the desk and then continued to play with my hair.

I stirred a little bit and slowly began to open my eyes, she must have seen that I was awake because she kissed me on my noise and then my lips which made me smile.

"Hey there sleepy head," she said to me.

"Hey," I said as I looked up at her and put a strand of her hair behind her ear. She was covered up by the sheets but still looked so beautiful and pretty.

"You have a good nap? I nodded.

"You're incredible," I said to her making her blush. She was so cute.

"I wish could just lie in bed with you all day," Santana told me, I thought the same thing. Just lying here, being all wrapped up in each other felt so good. I nuzzled into the crook of her neck and kissed her there.

"Then lets do that," I mumbled from her neck making her laugh.

"I wish but you have class in an hour," I made my pout face to her and she just laughed and tapped me on the noise.

"I can skip it," I said to her as we shared a long kiss.

"No you can't, I won't let you miss it because of me," She was so caring and great.

"Yes you can. You're worth it," she laughs and then flips so she's on top of me and gives me a quick kiss.

"Nope, time to get up," she rolls off of me and I grown. I miss her warmth. She grabbed her shirt from off the floor and put it back on her and then proceeded to throw mine at me. I groaned again and then flopped back onto my pillow.

"Can't we lie in bed a little longer?" I ask while doing my famous pout that I know Santana can't stand.

"Stop that. That's not playing fair," She says to me which only makes me smile. She then moves towards me and runs her hand up my thigh and kisses me long my jaw line and works her way to my neck causing me to shutter. I instantly feel my heart start race and my breathing get heavy. She has such an effect on me. She's even better then ducks. I'd much rather stair at her all day. She starts to suck at my neck when suddenly she stops and moved away from me to the other end of the room.

"Tease," I tell her but she just shrugs at me and gives me a wink.

"Maybe if you behave we might finish that later," She tells me which only makes my heart race more. We defiantly have to finish that later.

I went to my class, which was completely boring, I had trouble understanding what was going on and I was completely bored. I hated it. I was happy it was over with and now I was heading back to my door room to talk to Rachel. Apparently she had some kind of meeting with an upper year student. I was wondering what it was about, she was going to tell me all about it.

I entered my room to see Rachel sitting on the bed doing some of her homework. I closed the door behind me and she jumped up in shock scream out and putting her hand on her chest like I gave her a heart attack or something. She was always a drama queen and this was just one of her ways of expressing that. I couldn't help but chuckle at her reaction but then she turned to me and gave me a death look. Obviously she didn't like it that I laughed.

"So how'd it go?" I ask her as I put down my backpack and sit on my bed.

"Pretty good, she is supposed to help me with my upcoming performance for my acting class. I really don't know how she is going to help me because I'm so talented but we'll see.," I couldn't help but chuckle.

"Tell me about it," I tell her.

"She was nice, and pretty. She had blonde hair and is in Santana's year I think. Her names Quinn." I wonder if Santana knew her, maybe I would ask her about it later because I knew that she lived with a girl named Quinn. It would be funny if they were the same person.

"Did you figure out what song you are going to sing?" I ask.

"Not yet, we have to sing it together, it's part of the assignment. An upper year has to sing a sing with a first year. We had such a hard time deciding what song to sing, she didn't even want to do Barbra! Who doesn't want to do Barbra!" Rachel rolled her eyes thinking about Quinn.

"Maybe you guys could compromise," I tell her.

"No, I don't do that. The only good thing that we figured out is that she was willing to eat my vegan food." I laugh because hardly anyone can put up with Rachel and her vegan food. "But enough about me, tell me about you and Santana." I instantly smile.

"She's great. She really gets me." I say smiling, I can't help but think of what happened a couple of hours ago.

"What's that smile I see?" She asks me.

"Nothing," I say with my head down, I never was a really good liar.

"Oh my god, you two totally had sex! Oh I'm so proud of you!" I slap her of her arm and am pretty sure I'm blushing furiously. I look down again to contain the smile that's on my face. "So was she good?"

"I'm not telling you about my sex life," I tell her.

"Come on, I know you want to talk about it. Tell me!" She's pretty forceful and I know she's not going to let this go until I give her an answer.

"She's amazing. Everything was so great." I said as I realize that I'm blushing again.

"That's cute!" She tells me.

"She's pretty great," I tell Rachel.

"So I guess everything's all good in your life then," she says.

"Yeah," I say but soon after something flashes into my eyes and I have something else going on.

"What's wrong?" She asks me.

"Tina, she keeps setting me up with guys and I don't want them, I just want Santana but if I tell Tina I'm dating her she'll have a fit. You know how much she hates her," I say and Rachel just nods along processing everything.

"Well if she can't handle it, why are you friends with her," she asks me.

"Because we were close, she was my best friend," I tell her.

"Was, your best friend. If you ask me I don't know if she's worth it anymore. You have to ask yourself, who means more to you, Santana or Tina," that was the easiest question someone had ever asked me. I didn't have to think about it, I knew right from the start who it would be.

"Santana of course," I say, she makes me feel safe, she doesn't bring me down and she's always there for me. She's the best person I could ever ask for. I can be myself around her and I don't feel like I constantly need to impress her. It's a great feeling, I feel free when I'm around her and with Tina I always feel like she's pushing at me. She doesn't get me, I remember all the times she would call me stupid and it hurt. Santana has never once called me that.

"Then you have your answer right?" Rachel was right.

"Yeah."

"Good, cause I like you two together, you and Santana. I'm rooting for you guys," I laugh at that. I hear a sound and it's my phone going off. I smile when I see its Santana calling. "Answer it, go on."

"Hey baby," I say smiling.

"_Hey you! How was class" She asks me, she's always concerned about everything and that's what makes her so special. _

"So boring, I'd rather of spent the time with you," I say and can hear her chuckle on the other line.

"_I have a question for you, how would you like to come out to a concert with me tonight? They're a band here at the university and are playing at the concert call here but it should be good and exciting, if not then I understand but it's going to be really good and we can do something after, I donno and yea but like..." she was rambling. I didn't know what she had to be nervous about but it was cute. _

"San, I would love to go," I said as I cut her off.

"_Really? Great! It starts at eight so I can pick you up then," she tells me. _

"Yeah that's great! I can't wait." I say.

"_Me either! I'll see you soon, I miss you," I notice the biggest smile creep up on my face and I know Rachel see's it too because she looks away and just shakes her head. _

"I miss you too, but I'll see you in a few hours." I tell her.

_Great! See ya, bye," she says as she hangs up the phone. _

"Got a date with Santana?" Rachel asks me and I nod quickly.

"Yeah, help me decide what to wear?" I ask her, and she immediately gets up and makes her way over towards my closet looking through every single thing I own. I see many clothes fly out of there but then I remember something, this is Rachel I'm going to for fashion advice. Her fashion has gotten way better since high school, she's even a little bit slutty but I still don't think it will be good enough for Santana. I decide to give her a chance because she might pick out something good.

I look at my clothes for at least an hour and finally come up with something good to wear, and I have to say Rachel picked out better clothes that what I was going to wear. I wanted to pick out my ducky shirt along with my leg warmers and jeans but she picked out a nice shirt and boots. I would have to say I was ready for my date.

Santana comes a little early to my door and I'm happy to see her, she looks so amazing, so hot I can't believe she's my girlfriend. She's wearing a white shirt that fits her perfectly and her jeans are tight making her hips and ass stand out. I like this outfit. As we walk to the concert hall she takes my hand and I feel a rush of warm energy flow within me, she makes me so happy but she's fidgeting with her other hand and I know something's up.

"You alright?" I ask her.

"Of course, never been better." She says to me but for some reason I don't believe her.

"Ok," I know not to push her but I can't feel like it was something I did. Maybe it was the sex. Maybe she didn't like it and was regretting it. Maybe I wasn't good enough. I feel a sudden sink in my stomach and wonder if it was me that did something wrong. I decide not to let it get to me right now and to focus on the concert that we're going to see.

The concert hall is jammed packed with people, I stay close to Santana as I hold her hand making sure that I don't get lost. I want to stay close to her. She brings me closer up to the front and I can hear the music, it's so great it makes me want to dance in front of everyone. I smile at her and she smiles back at me, suddenly all my past worries go away and I couldn't feel happier.

"You like it?" she asks me.

"I love them, they are so good!" I yell because I can't really hear myself good over the loud music that's playing.

"Good, I thought you might!" She yells back at me so I can barley hear what she's saying.

A little more into the concert, I'm standing next to Santana holding my drink and she's holding the same one as me. I look at her and she seems very into the music, or seems a little distracted from me. I can't tell if she's actually listening so clearly to the band or just trying to make it seem that way so I won't ask any questions. I look down at the floor feeling a little concerned. Santana tells me what's on her mind and now I feel like I'm out of the loop.

We listen to a few more songs and exchange a few kisses here and there but she still seems distracted. I feel my throat start to get a little dry like I need water. I look around and see a little bar at the corner; I motion to Santana to tell her I'm going to get a drink, she nods at me and turns to look at the band again. For a second I thought she might come with me but she doesn't so I turn away from her and go get some water.

I look at the bar man and finally he brings his attention toward me so I can get a drink. There are a bunch of guys around that are staring at me, which is kind of freaky so I try to ignore them. I see one of them come up to me and I only wish that he will go away.

"Hey there beautiful," this one guy says to me, but I roll my eyes and look away. "Can I get you a drink," he asks me.

"No thanks," I tell him and go back to drinking my water.

"Please, I think you could use one," he says to me as he rubs his hand on my thigh. I push it off and right now I wish Santana were here, she would put that guy in his place but she's on the floor instead watching the band.

"Look I'm really not interested. I'm here with my beautiful girlfriend and I really don't want to be here with you right now," he looks at me and then looks at another girl and scoffs.

"Fine be that way," he says and goes to someone else. I roll my eyes, I can't believe how guys can be such big pigs.

After I finish my water I make my way back to Santana, I am excited to see her again, I after I saw that guy at the bar I really need to be with her right now even if she seems a little distracted. As I make my way through the crowd I see her hair and then her body and her face until... no this can't be happening right now. I feel the tears well up in my eyes. I've been crying so much for the past couple days I don't need to cry again.

I can't believe Santana would do this, here I see her in front of me, kissing another girl. I can't, this can't be happening. I try my best to hold my tears in but I still feel so broken. Santana stops kissing the girl and looks up to see me looking at her, I just stair because I don't know what else to do.

"Britt," she says softly but I don't care, I can't deal with her right now. I feel like I'm about to start crying and I don't want to cry in front of her so I quickly try and get away from her. I push my way through the crowd trying to get out. I can hear Santana behind me, calling my name but I try to ignore it.

I make it outside until I can't hold back my tears anymore, they pour out of me while I start to shake and cough because it's all too much for me to handle. I whip the tears away from my eyes but they still keep coming, I have no control over them. I feel so broken right now, I feel so stupid. I can't believe I fell for her, I can't believe she would do this to me, I feel like my heart had just been stomped on by a thousand pound elephant.

"Britt," I jump in shock as hear the voice behind me, it sounds sad and broken but I don't want to turn around. I don't want to talk to her right now.

"Go away," I tell her, I don't want to see her.

"Please Britt, let me explain please!" I turn around to face her and see her face breaks when she see's that I've been crying.

"I don't want to hear it Santana," I tell her coldly. I'm proud of myself, I never thought I had this much power to stand up to her when I'm in this state.

"Please Britt, you gotto let me explain. That girl she mean nothing to me, please Britt you're my everything." She tells me.

"Obviously not. You know you could just told me you weren't happy instead of kissing some other girl," I tell her, I'm so hurt now but I try to hardest to be strong. For my sake.

"No Britt, it's nothing like that. I'm so happy with you," she tried to tell me.

"Ha! God how could I be so stupid!" I yell at myself, maybe everyone is right, maybe I am stupid. "God it's true, I'm so stupid!"

"No Brittany you're not! You're not stupid so please don't call yourself that!" Santana tells me, I used to believe her but now, I don't know what to think anymore.

"I knew it, I knew something was going on, you've been acting weird since we had sex. If I wasn't good then just tell me, because anything's better them this. It's better than anything," I tell her, I can't take this right now. My emotions are everywhere because of everything I have been though in the past couple of days. I really don't need something else to pile on top of that.

"It has nothing to do with that! It was so great! You were amazing! You're beautiful and smart and are so brave. You mean everything to me," somehow I don't believe her.

" Stop lying okay! Just break up with me then. You've been ignoring me and being all weird and stuff, I just can't do this then! So leave me along," I say and only after I finish realize that I'm completely out of breath and sobbing.

"I don't want to break up with you Brittany. I never wanted too," I roll my eyes at that.

"Oh please..." I say when she cuts me off.

"It's true, I don't want to break up with you, and you know why? Because I love you! I fricken love you and this is not how I wanted to say it! I was so nervous because I wanted to tell you that I love you! And now it's ruined because of that girl! I wanted it to be all special, but it's all been ruined," I was taken my complete surprise. I didn't know what to think about that.

"Then who was that other girl?" I ask.

"Some random girl that was so drunk at the concert. I didn't even kiss her. She kissed me! I didn't kiss back I swear. She caught me by surprise."

"Did she?" I asked.

"Yes she did! Please believe. She started talking to me and I told her I wasn't interested but out of the blue she kissed me! I pushed her away, I only want you. I wanted when I said I love you to be special. I was so nervous, I didn't know how you would take it but I love you Britt, so much. It's just you Brittany, it's only been just you," she says to me and I literally feel like my hearts going to explode. I look at her in the eyes and can see she's telling the truth.

"You love me?" I ask question.

"Yes! I love you so much, so, so much Britt." She looks at me pleadingly.

"I love you too," I say whipping my eyes and I see the biggest smile appear on Santana's face. She moves towards me and moves my hair back from my face and then gives me the best, passionate kiss ever. I feel every inch of my body busting with love and in this moment I feel so happy.

"I'm sorry, I never want to hurt you ok. I'm so sorry," she tells me and I nod and understand.

"I know," I tell her.

"I love you," she tells me again.

**Hope you all liked the chapter! Tell me if you did or not. **


	14. Morning Surprises

I wake up that morning curled up into Santana, her arm is resting around my waist pulling me in close to her. I felt the smile creep up on my face, it felt nice to wake up next to her, it always felt nice to wake up next to her especially after the events from last night. Make up sex mixed with I love you sex it the best combination anyone could ever ask for.

I slowly open my eyes to see my bedroom, there is only reason why I like this small door room and that's because the beds are so small which means I get to cuddle extra close to Santana. I love how she holds me when I just wake up from a good nights sleep, I love how she's here when I wake up and doesn't escape in the middle of the night. I love her so much and I'm so happy I get to see her everyday.

Her skin is against mine and even though it's cold outside I feel so warm and comfy with her by my side. I love how soft her skin in, I love how close together we are, I wish I could lie like this forever. I stair at her beautiful face and see all the perfections that she is. She looks so calm when she sleeps so peaceful it warms my heart inside. She moves her head close to me and a single strand of hair falls onto her face. I smile and brush it away from face putting it behind her ear every carefully making sure I wouldn't wake her up.

She shifts in her sleep and I can't help but smile, I crawl closer into her and cuddle up hoping that I can fall back asleep. Thankfully it's Saturday and I don't have to be anywhere. I can stay in bed with my beautiful girlfriends who I love very much. That just kept running through my mind, that I love her and that she loves me. That's the best feeling to have.

Just as I was about to doze off again I heard someone bang on my door annoyingly hard. It shocked me and I bounced up causing me to get the biggest head rush. I tried to balance myself out and think who would be knocking on the door at this hour. I tried to get out of bed quickly and throw some sweats on in order to keep Santana sleeping. We hardly got any sleep last night, not that I'm complaining but I wanted to make sure she had a good nights sleep.

As I had just finished putting on my sweatshirt the banning on my door started again and this time it woke Santana up. A frown rose on my face, first of all its early in the morning and they practically woke me up but now they had woken Santana up too.

"Mmmmhh, door," Santana mumbled from the pillow, I had to laugh from how cute she looked all ruffled up in the blankets trying to get as much sleep as she could.

The banging on the door gets louder and I groan, has this person never heard of patients? Santana looks up at me from the bed and frowns, it's the cutest thing I've ever saw. I knew my pout was good but hers just makes me melt inside. I can't tell her that though or else she'll use it against me.

"Who is knocking on your door this early? Tell them to go!" Santana whines.

"Just go back to bed baby, I'll get ride of them," I smile at her.

"I want you to come back in bed with me," I smile and nod. Satisfied she flops back down onto the pillow trying to get more sleep.

I open the door a crack in order to keep the voices down so Santana can go back to sleep. As I open it my eyes shoot open and I suddenly become wide awake. Tina is standing in front of me looking extremely pissed off. I swallow a lump and prepare myself for what's about to come. She slams her hand on the door which makes me jump, she looks back at me with the biggest frown on her face.

I can hear Santana raise her head from the bed and I know she will pounce as soon as she wakes up at little so with my hand I tell her to go back to bed. I don't want Tina to know about her, not yet at least. I honestly don't care what Tina thinks anymore, I just don't want to have this conversation this early in the morning.

"Brittany what the fuck!" Tina practically screamed at me, to be honest I was a little surprised that she expected me to know what I did wrong.

"Can I help you?" I said, I really didn't feel like dealing with her now but then again I never really want to deal with her. Thank god Rachel wasn't here last night or else she would really have been annoyed.

"Here I am trying to set you up with nice guys and you do nothing about them! Do you know how hard it is to find someone for you?" Oh no, not this again.

"Tina I told you, I don't want to be set up with anyone," I said for the... well I don't even know I've said it so many times that I've lost count. I wanted her to go away, I want to crawl back in bed with Santana and cuddle up to her and just lie there kissing her and maybe even some other stuff.

"You need someone in your life Britt! You don't want to be single forever do you?"

"And what makes you think that I'll be single for ever?" I ask.

"Well come on, it's you!" I was shocked at her, she was supposed to be a good friends of mine. "I sent a guy over here last night and you weren't even home! It made me look like an idiot."

"You are an idiot," I hear Santana mumble from the bed and a small smile creeps up on my face but I try and hid it or else Tina will think I'm smiling at her.

"Look Tina I don't need a guy and I really don't owe you any explanation to where I was last night," I am proud for how I stand up to her.

"You really don't get it do you?" Tina tells me.

"Get what?"

"You need to find someone now! I don't want you coming to me anymore when you need help or have a problem or need to talk to someone," I was surprised at Tina's comment, she was actually so mean!

"I don't come to you anyway," I told her.

"Thank god," I felt hurt, I knew I shouldn't but I do. "I don't want to deal with your stupidness, it's to much. Sometimes I wonder why we're friends Britt." She called me stupid, no one has done that in a long time. I felt the tears start to form in my eyes but I didn't want to give Tina the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

My eyes suddenly widened as I heard Santana getting out of the bed angrily. She was ready to attack, I grew scared, even after all this I still didn't want Tina to know, I couldn't not yet at least. So I slammed the door shut and tackled Santana down on the bed so she was unable to move. She struggled against me and I felt like I could feel her anger radiating off of her.

"Britt let me go! I'm about to go all lima heights!" She called out.

"No, please. Just calm down baby, I'm okay," I tell her in my most convincing voice.

"No you're not. Your eyes are red, like you're going to cry. She has no right to call you stupid Britt, you're not! You're so smart, now let me up so I can kick her ass!" Angry Santana is such a turn on.

"No," I say.

"Britt! Get off," there is a knock at the door and suddenly Tina calls through. This is not a good time!

"Brittany! Is there someone in there with you! Oh my god did you finally get a guy! Let me in, I want to meet him! Finally someone who actually can stand you're stupidness" And from those words I found myself on the floor tangled up in the blankets and Santana up on her feet moving towards the door.

The door flew open shocking Tina, which made her take a step back and her mouth literally dropped open. I guess she might as well no, it's no like a care what she thinks, maybe this will get her off my back and we can all move on with our lives.

"How dare you call Brittany stupid!" Santana spat at Tina's face, Tina whipped the spit off her lip that Santana had sprayed into her mouth.

"What? You did, all through high school," Santana's face slumped down, I knew she felt bad about that, I knew she hated herself for that and now Tina was bringing all those memories back. "Don't think you were any better then me cause you aren't. You don't deserve her friendship."

I don't think Tina has figured it out yet, I don't think she knows that I'm dating her I think she thinks were just friends but honestly Santana means so much more to me then that. Santana slowly lowers her head, I've never seen her this defeated before she's usually so strong ready to lash out at anyone. I feel anger rise up inside me and I don't like the feeling, I hardly ever get angry and I don't like the feeling but no one makes Santana sad.

"You're worthless, mean and I seriously don't know how you have any friends," Tina bitched back.

"Oh and what makes you think you're any better?" Santana asked.

"Because I was friends with Brittany when she needed one, unlike you who made her life miserable every day of her life," that wasn't true. Santana was the better person, better then anyone I ever knew. Tina was really getting to Santana. " You're getting in the way of Brittany's life, she doesn't need a bitch like you in her life."

"Don't talk to her that way!" I snapped, I didn't think I had it in me, I guess Santana and Tina didn't either because they immediately turned their attention towards me in shock.

"Brittany don't even defend her, you know she's bad news, I'm just trying to protect you," Tina said.

"No you're not. You're just trying to get your way, like you always do. You don't think before you act and don't care how it affects other people. I'm not stupid and I don't need a guy to complete me, I have everything I need. And you don't know anything about Santana so leave her alone!" I say angrily.

"You never could defend anyone well, could you," Tina said with a smirk. "Never mind, I don't have time for this, I have a nice guy waiting downstairs for you and..."

"No, Tina, I don't want any guys!" I shout.

"I just don't understand, just come meet him and..." I cut her off again, I don't want to deal with her AT ALL!

"I am already dating someone!" Tina just stares at me all stunned. Her eyes and opened wide and her mouth has dropped down a little bit.

"What?"

"That's right, you heard me, I am dating someone who I love very much and if you must know that's why I'm not interested in anyone else. I look at Santana and see a big smile on her face, she looking at the ground all embarrassed.

"They can't be that good," Tina said to me.

"You're right there not. They're better then good, now I would really like it if you would leave," I said.

"Well can I at least meet this person," Tina asks.

"You have. She's standing right in front of you or maybe you didn't see her because of all your insults," Tina looks angry now, she looks shocked, she looks like she has a bunch of emotions running through her at the moment and she doesn't know what to do with herself.

"You're dating Santana? As in a girl!?" Tina asks.

"Yup, that's right," I smile.

"That's gross!" Tina screams.

"Well then you're going to think this is disgusting," Santana said as she walks up to my face and kisses me gently on the lips. I smile into the kiss knowing that I'm not only kissing the love of my life but I'm also making Tina angry.

"Brittany what have you done with your life," Tina said, but it wasn't a question, I could sense her disappointment.

"I'm happy, and I don't need your approval for anything," I tell her. Santana's mine and I'm the happiest I've been in a long time thanks to her.

"Well you know what..." Tina started to say.

"We don't care, now listen troll, you should just go back to your bridge and hide that ugly face or yours because honestly no one wants to see it. Britts can take care of herself and she doesn't need you telling her what to do or who to date," I tried my hardest to hold in my laugh but I couldn't. Santana had got her bitch back and it wasn't directed to me this time.

I could tell Tina was speechless, she defiantly wasn't expecting that. Her eyes were widened and she was trying to say something but nothing would come out of her mouth.

"Have a nice day," Santana said shutting the door on Tina's stunned face. I turn to Santana and tackle her down onto the bed kissing her hard, I love how Santana is so great. I love everything she did.

"I love you so much," I tell her and then kiss her face again, I feel her smile into the kiss.

"I love you too," she tells me and kisses my cheek.

"And you know what..." I say to her.

"What?"

"Tina can suck it," Santana burst out laughing and smiles at me.

"Oh my god Britt, you're to cute," she says as she kisses my cheek and then my mouth. "Please come back in bed with me, I wants to get my cuddles on now." Oh course I listened to Santana. Anytime to cuddle with her is my favorite.

00000000000

Later that day I went to my lecture, it was my boring 2 hours lecture that I hated so much. I don't even know why I took the class in the first place, I guess it was because people said it was an easy mark but honestly I'd rather take a hard course then sit in this lecture.

This time as I was in my lecture I felt someone's eyes staring at me, they were coming from behind but I tried my best not to turn around. Almost 15 minutes had gone by and I still felt their eyes on me so I slowly decided to turn around. I looked up at the back of the room and that's when I saw this blonde girl staring at me. She then broke out into a soft smile. Was she hitting on me? No, I doubt it besides I already have the best girlfriend in the world, but just so I wouldn't be rude I smiled back and then turned my attention back to the front.

The lecture dragged on and on, I might have even fallen asleep at one point, I don't know I wasn't really focused on anything at the moment. I felt like I was just dying on boredom. Time went by... so slowly . Painfully slow, so slow I was sure that even a turtle could out win this race.

Finally I could get up and be free from this thing. I packed up my things and headed out the door to walk to my favorite coffee store where I would start to get some work done. I made it about two steps out of the building when thought I heard someone calling for me from behind. It was probably nothing so I kept on walking. Suddenly I felt someone tap the back of my shoulder, so I stopped and turned around.

It was that girl. The girl who smiled at me in the lecture, I would be lying is I said she wasn't hot but honestly right now, my type was to Latina's who could make my head spin when she said my name. When she said my name.

"Hi, I'm Cass," the girl said to me.

"Brittany," I said and took her hand, shaking it.

"That was some lecture wasn't it," she asked me, I had to admit that made me smile because it was dripping with sarcasm.

"Ha, oh yeah if you're into that stuff," I say.

"I take it you took this class for the easy mark as well?" She asked me.

"I did, I guess we both got sucked into that huh," I say with a grin.

"So anyway, I was wondering that maybe if you're not doing anything now, that maybe you would want to grab a coffee with me or something?" and there is was. The question, I wish we could have been friends she seemed cool.

"Actually I'm dating someone at the moment. Sorry," I tell her but she looked surprised and not in the good way.

"Dating someone? But Tina said you were single," Tina, Tina was telling girls to go ask me out now! This was getting out of hand, ok so she wasn't angry that I was dating a girl, she was angry I was dating Santana.

"Tina set you up to this!" I say

"Oh no, she just told me that you were single, I've had my eye on you for quiet some time," I was really mad at Tina now, when was she going to learn to stop. That it's Santana I want and nobody else.

"Look I'm sorry but like I said before, I'm in a happy relationship," Santana was the only girl for me.

"Well if it ever doesn't work out between you two, you should look me up," the girl said with a wink and then walked away. I was left stunned, I hated how Tina always had to get her noise in my business.

Back at my room Rachel was doing some homework, or trying to, it seemed like she was a little distracted. I closed the door carefully trying not to disturb her but I had caught her attention anyways. She let out a huff, I tried to ignore her though. She later let out a bigger huff, I knew she was trying to get my attention; she was always a drama queen. When I didn't respond that time she let out an even bigger huff.

"Yes?" I asked her.

"Sometimes life is just so ugh, you know," even I didn't know.

"No, what are you talking about?" I ask her.

"I'm talking about that Quinn girl, the one I'm supposed to be working on a project with. She's cool and all but she just wants to be in charge of everything," Rachel said.

"Sound familiar?" I tell her, I say this because it's usually always Rachel that wants to do everything, she barley listens to people's opinions and just wants to do it her way.

"You're supposed to be on my side," Rachel huffs.

"Tell you what, why don't you invite her out sometime along with her boyfriend, Santana and me," I knew who Quinn was, I knew she was Santana's friend so what better way to bond. Santana was telling me how Quinn had to work with a girl named Rachel, she thought it might be this Rachel.

"Yeah I guess. So what's knew in your life?" She asked me. I told her about Tina and how she found out Santana and I are dating, how she wanted to set another girl up with me and just wouldn't let me live my life.

"That bitch! I'll tell you what Britt, I'll go over there and kick some ass!" I laughed.

"Rach, you couldn't hurt a fly," I tell her.

"Could to," I gave her the look and she shrugged, she knew I was right.

"Well then, next time she tried something like that, just tell me, I'll think of something," Rachel tells me.

**I know it's been a long time since I last updated, I've just been so busy with applying to university and stuff. And for those of you who have been asking me I will update A Life Worth Living and Growing Up soon. **

**Honostly I don't know where to take this story anymore so if you have idea's that would be great! But what did you think about this chapter? Good, bad? Thoughts? Thanks for reading! **


	15. Broken

I want to speak to Santana, I want to tell her everything, how I am so pissed off at Tina, how I couldn't stop thinking of her while that other girl decided to hit on me. I want to tell her that I love her. I've decided it, I will tell her. I need to. I can't stop the feelings and I just want her to know she's the only one for me. I want to share it with everyone. I want to show Tina that I don't need anyone but Santana to make me happy. I pull out my phone and text her.

**Santana: Hey baby, can we meet now? I need to tell you something important. :D**

I instantly get a text back from her.

**Brittany: I'm sorry, I have a meeting somewhere. I'll be done soon though, meet you later? **

**Santana: Of course! xox**

I decided to do something right, so I marched over to Tina's house ready to give her a peace of my mind. Now usually I was a passive person, someone who doesn't like to fight and just likes to keep the peace but this time Tina had really gone to far. I just couldn't take it with her anymore. This was the last straw, I loved Santana and even if I hadn't told her that yet, she was the only one for me and Tina couldn't get in the way of that.

I had, had enough and that's why I decided I was going to go over there and end this friendship or whatever you call it now, that I had with her. I was done, I couldn't take it anymore. Her and I were soon to be ex friends. I get why Tina had set me up with a bunch of guys before she knew I was dating someone. But now that she knew, I couldn't believe she was still trying to set me up with someone.

As I approached her house I went over in my mind what I was about to say, because I had never really bitched out at someone I didn't really know what to do or how to act but I guess the rage I felt inside of me was a start. I decided to take some of Santana's skills as go a lima heights on her ass as she would say.

Tina's door came into sight and I pounded on that thing, I pounded on it so hard that if she was sleeping she would have heard it. I waited for a couple of seconds and started to grow impatient because I was so angry so I banged on her door again. Suddenly I saw the doorknob turn and Tina was standing in front of me giving me one of her _I'm better then you _smirks. The sight of her made me cringe, I was tired of her, I was tired of everything.

"Brittany, how are you, please come in," Tina said with a cheeky voice, I really didn't like it.

"No Tina, I am here to tell you something and set you straight," I say in a harsh tone hoping that she would catch onto how angry I was.

"Shouldn't I be the one to set you straight," Tina giggled.

"Please stop talking Tina, I need to tell you something," great even when I try to be angry I still have to be polite.

"Well, go on then," she says to me.

"This has gone on to far, I hated when you tried to set me up with guys, when I told you not to and now, you send girls to hit on me! I told you that I'm with Santana, I don't want anyone else and I can't deal with you anymore," I say hoping that I'm clear enough... apparently not.

"Oh Brit Brit, when are you going to learn that she's not good for you," Tina said.

"No, you're not good for me! Santana's been nothing but sweet and caring, you on the other hand don't listen to a thing I say and don't care for that matter. And don't you ever call me Brit Brit again, only Santana gets to call me that," I'm pretty sure I got this angry thing right now.

"That's pathetic," Tina scoffed.

"Shut up!" I yell.

"Oh, getting sassy on me now are we," I felt so angry inside, I felt like a volcano was going to erupt inside me. "Brit, you don't want Santana, she's a bitch, a whore and she's got so many problems. I bet she's already cheated on you, she's probably slept with half the school by now and do you know why, because she doesn't want some stupid little ass hanging on her every minute of the day. She's obviously using you as a sex toy, wake up and see what's really going on here!" I was taken back from the comment, that wasn't true. I know it wasn't.

"Don't call me stupid," I say. "I'm not, and Santana doesn't sleep around with people, she would never do that. You're just making things up."

"I wish I were Brit," I look at her confused. "Do you know why I sent that girl out on you after your class today?" I shook my head. "It's because about an hour before that I was informed that Santana was lonely. I heard that she needed someone to fuck her brains out. You obviously weren't around so she went to take care of things. I bet she's even still there now."

"She wouldn't do that." I say.

"But she did. Think about it, has she canceled on you at all today or done anything funny?" Tina said.

Then it hit me, I had texted Santana before I came her telling her I needed to say something, she said she couldn't come. But she was just busy right? She would never do anything to hurt me. She wouldn't do that, she's changed since then, I know she has. I thought about it more, she didn't even put a heart or anything in her text. It was cold, like if she was avoiding me or with someone else. I looked up to Tina and she looked at me.

"She has hasn't she," I slowly nodded. "I thought so."

"But she said she had a meeting," I say.

"And do you believe her," I do... I did. Tina's making me all confused now I don't know what I believe.

"I..." I don't know what else to say.

"Listen, I talked to the girl after, she told me! I'll even give her you number if you don't believe me. She'll tell you she did," I swallowed hard.

Tina got some paper and wrote down the girls number and then handed it to me. I felt dizzy, like at any moment I would just drop to the floor. Santana wouldn't cheat on me right? She wouldn't do that. But at the back of my mind I felt a little bit unsure. I looked down and stared at the paper. I know I shouldn't believe her but a small part of me does.

"Think of everything she did to you in high school, why would she suddenly want to be nice now? Brit, I'm just looking out for you," I look into her eyes and it doesn't seem like she's lying.

"But I..." I chock on the _love her_ part.

"You love her? Brit don't do that to yourself, she doesn't love you. She's using you, don't give into her," Tina said.

"She wouldn't," I say, but this time I don't say it to her, I say it to myself.

"Call, I could be wrong, but at least call," she tells me.

I pull out my phone and begin to dial the number. This was not what I was expecting to happen. I didn't want to call, I wanted everything to be normal again, but something inside me was feeling doubt. I finished dialing and looked up at Tina still unsure if I should call. She nudged me and then I hit the call button. It rang, it rang for an awful long time but then I heard a voice on the other end, and it broke my heart.

"_This is Chelsea's phone, Santana speaking,"_ I felt the tears well up in my eyes as I kept the phone pressed to my ear. "_Hello? Hello?"_ Santana said on the other end.

I couldn't do anything, I just held the phone up to my ear and stood there in complete shock. I felt my heart move into my throat, I felt sick. The tears were rolling down my face now and I felt like the whole world just had come crashing down on me. Tina pulled the phone away from my face and turned it off, she looked at me with sad eyes. I couldn't express how I was feeling in this moment. Devastation, tragedy, betrayal, just every emotion was running through me now.

"Brit what happened?" Tina asked.

"S-she answered it," I chock on the last word and fall on the ground as I break into tears. My sobs grow stronger and I have a hard time breathing, I can't process everything that's happened, I can't take it. Tina moves so she's hugging me now, I just can't believe Santana would do this to me. After everything we've been though.

I begin to feel alone, depressed, like nothing matters in the world anymore. I feel like my heart has been shredded to pieces, like someone took a shotgun and shut shot a whole through my heart. I feel my breath hitch and I feel like I can't go on. I begin to shake, I can't control my crying. I'm crying lying on the ground, in Tina's arms feeling so helpless.

"Shh, Brit, I'll always be here to protect you." Tina says as she holds me on the ground.

It's been a week since I've last talked to Santana, she text me after I left Tina's house but I didn't answer. It hurt too much, I couldn't do it. Knowing where she was, what she was doing, I couldn't text her back. I felt angry but mostly I felt sad and used. Tina was right I am stupid. I was too stupid to realize that something good could come out of the world, that Santana was good. I was too stupid to see that she hadn't changed.

Santana had been texting me non stop for the past week asking me where I was, and why I wasn't answering. I spent the week at Tina's hoping to get away from it all. Even Rachel texted me telling me Santana had come by, but she gave her the cold shoulder and told her to go fuck herself. I was happy to know my friends had my back. After a while I stopped readying Santana's text. I couldn't deal with the pain anymore.

Just this morning I got a call from her, actually I got a bunch of calls from her but I decided not the answer. I deleted her messages, if I heard her voice I knew I would break down and that was something I couldn't do. But somehow this morning, there was a text from her, a text that I happened to read telling me she was confused; she didn't know why I was ignoring her.

She hadn't found out that I knew she was using me, once I was strong enough I would give her a piece of my mind. She made me happy, I loved her and she broke my heart. I couldn't get by the day without thinking about her, without crying about her. I knew my tears weren't worth her time but I couldn't stop them.

Today was the day I had decided to get out of bed and go to one of my classes, I knew I would have to. I missed way too much school already, so I got ready and dragged myself to my class. That's where I am now. I pack up my things ready to leave the building, to go back into my bed and cry away my feelings. I can see the door but suddenly I am blocked by a figure. A short figure and when I see her face my heart breaks even more, I can't do this now, I can't face Santana.

"Britt, can we talk?" Santana's voice is shaky, quiet, she looks like she's been crying, but I can't feel bad. I can't let it get to me. I try and be strong, I try to fight my feelings.

**So I realized if I make the chapters shorted I can update quicker because I won't have to spend that much time on each. So hopfully expect quicker update on this story. **

**I know it was a sad chapter and Tina is a bitch! But let me know what you think, what do you think will happen between Santana and Tina? How much of a shit despterber is Tina? Hope you enjoyed it. It will get happier eventually don't worry. **


	16. Never Stupid

Santana is here. Santana is standing right in front of me. The thing is, I no how stupid I'm being about this, I know what Tina is telling me is probably not true, but yet there's still a part of me that's so scared that this is actually too good to believe. I'm scared to lose Santana but at the same time I'm pushing her away. I hate everything right now, I was to be able to talk to her, to hug her and kiss her but I just stare at her blankly.

I can't believe how stupid I'm being, I know not to trust Tina, I shouldn't. I only do because she's the one person that always told me what was going on. Like in the eight grade when I went out with Mark, she told me that he was only dating me to gain popularity. I didn't believe her at first but a few weeks later I over heard the guys talking at the back of the class, Tina had been right.

Then again in grade 11 when I was dating Artie, she had told me that Artie was only dating me because people thought I'd be easy, which wasn't true, I wasn't easy. I didn't believe Tina that time either, and kept dating Artie but then he started to get really mean because I wouldn't have sex with him. He hurt me one day, and I knew Tina was right again. The last time that happened was this summer when I tried dating another guy. Tina came and told me that he already had a girlfriend. This time I went and confronted the guy and leant that for the third time in a row, Tina was right.

Even though I really think that Tina is wrong this time, I can't help but feel like I'll be wrong. She's been right about all those other guys, why should she be lying this time. I'm scared, I can't loose Santana she means to much to me. But as always my fear gets the better of me.

"I-I have to go," I manage to croak out of my system.

It's hard to talk to her, I have to hold onto all my will power in order not to cry in front of her. I try and move past her but she quickly catches my arm. Her touch feels so good, but I can't let her know that.

"Britt, please," I try not to look into Santana's eyes, I know there probably glossy because she's trying to hold back her tears too and if I look, that will be the end of me. Knowing that I won't be able to get more words out of my mouth and shake my head and hope that she lets go of me. "Please, just give me 2 seconds."

She's begging now, and I hate the way her voice sounds like she's going to break down at any second. It's shaky and hurt but I keep thinking back to what Tina said. I shouldn't believe it; I'm stupid to believe it. If I let her explain herself then the truth will come out and I could end up alone, at least now I know we're together.

"Fine," I say. "But not here," Santana nods and I lead her out to a near by bench. I manage to finally look at her, I was right. Her eyes are all red like she's been crying and she just looks so broken. I heart breaks at the sight, I try and be angry but it's so hard.

"Please tell me why you've been ignoring me, why I've been getting the cold shoulder from Rachel. Please tell me what I did to upset you?" A tear rolls down Santana cheek and the sight of it makes me break.

"I think you know what you did, how could you not," I tell her.

"I don't, Britt I would never ever want to hurt you," she manages to say.

"Then don't sit there and lie to my face," that came out more harshly then I wanted it to.

"I'm so clueless Brittany, please, just please tell me. I can't stand the fact that you're mad at me, or the fact that I haven't seen you in a week. I love you so much and I just..." she stops talking because the tears have gained control.

"I needed to tell you something important but you couldn't make it," I finally said.

"I told you I was studying," she told me.

"Yeah, ok," I said as I rolled my eyes.

"You don't believe me? Britt I swear I was studying, I'm sorry I couldn't make it, I just had..." I cut Santana off, I was pretty proud of myself. I wasn't letting my feelings for Santana get to me.

"You were with some other girl!" Santana's eyes widened like I had caught her, head on.

"How do you know...?" She trailed off still surprised that I knew that.

"Tina was right, you know, I felt stupid for believing her because I thought that you might be different, but she was right, she was right." I say.

"Britt, what are you talking about? What did you talk to Tina about?" Santana put on the act of being confused.

"You know exactly what! If studying includes going over to see another girl and fucking her, then yeah, I bet you had a really good study session!" I was now yelling and raised my hard to my face wiping off a tear. I didn't even know I was crying until I did that. "She told me that and when I didn't believe her she gave me the girls number and you picked up! Do you really think I'm that stupid, that I wouldn't figure it out," I tell her.

"I don't think you're stupid and I didn't..."

"Save it Santana!"

"No, you can't go accusing me of things and then not hear my side! I can't believe you would actually believe her. After everything we've been through, that she's put you through. I'll admit I didn't go over there to study but I defiantly wasn't going over there for fuck her! How could you think such a thing!" Santana was now really angry. Her anger only made mine worse, I could feel my heart beating fast from the adrenaline and the rage inside me build up.

"Then what were you doing over there!?" I yell.

"The girl makes necklaces and I wanted to get you something ok! Cause you mean so much to me, I wanted to surprise you! I wanted to show you how special you are to me, but I guess you don't trust me enough for that do you!" I my heart broke inside and my face fell. God I really am so stupid to believe such a thing. I feel like my insides have just been torn apart and what's worse is that I've probably lost Santana now.

"I..." I tried to get out but honestly I didn't know what to say. I could feel a whole new batch of tears creep up on me.

"Save it Brittany, I get that Tina would try and convince you of those things but I never thought that you'd actually believe it," she was right. I was so stupid. I stand there with my head down because I honestly don't know what to say. I know 'I'm sorry' won't fix anything because when does it ever.

"Next time, maybe get your facts straight before you accuse people. God Brittany, I can't believe you would do something like that, that so..." she didn't say the last word but I knew what it was. I look up at her, with the tears falling out of my eyes. She has every right to say it even if I stung like a bitch. She has never called me stupid before, I didn't think the thought would ever cross her mind but it did. I feel broken inside.

"Stupid," I finish off her last word.

"No, Britt, I didn't meant it like that, you know I don't..." I cut her off again.

"No you're right. It was stupid, I'm stupid to believe her. God, I'm just so, so stupid, I," this time she cut me off.

"Stop that!" I look back at her with fearful eyes. She's never used that tone with me. "You're not stupid. I told you not to call yourself that. I wasn't going to say stupid, I would never say that because you're not. Do you understand me?" I nod, there is a long pause after that.

"Santana, I'm so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking," I say through my tears.

"Can we just, I just need time to think," that truly made me weak. Just the thought of the words to follow that, I needed Santana, I don't know what I'd do without her. I slowly nod, hoping that there is some chance for us to still be together. "I just need to think."

I watched Santana walk away after that. As I just stood there, letting my emotions take the best of me. I went back in my room after that and cried into Rachel. I told her everything and after she consoled me to the point where I stopped crying she marched over to Tina's and god knows what she did to her. I couldn't believe what I had done, I knew it wasn't true and yet I still believed her.

Rachel came into the room that night and found me lying on my bed with a box of tissues in my hand and some chips in the other. Except I haven't even opened the bag of chips, I was too depressed to eat, too sad to do anything. I managed to look up at Rachel who gave me a little smirk.

"I don't think Tina will bother you anymore," Rachel says to me, making me curious for what she did.

"What you do?" I ask.

"You remember that girl Quinn?" I nod. "Well her boyfriend is sort of a bad ass," she tells me.

"Puck?" I say.

"Yeah, Santana's friends," I wince at the name. "Sorry. But they did help me get Tina back. Puck gave her a real good scare so I don't think she'll be bothering you two again."

"Yeah if there's a two to bother," I said just thinking about the fact that Santana could break up with me.

"I'm sure things will work out," Rachel says trying to make me feel better but honestly I don't even know.

**The story will get happy soon, don't worry. But now Tina is like gone for good so be happy about that. Hope you like the story, let me know your thoughts. **


	17. Let Me Help You

"Ugh!" I came home and threw myself onto my bed just lying there hoping all my memories would go away. I had just come back from class and the lecture really didn't help me forget about my life problems at the moment. Our professor talked about how one error in life could affect the rest of it for better or worse. We were learning about the philosophies of life and how one action could change our whole life. Yes, I had to take a philosophy class in order to take dance, which was unfortunate.

He told us a story about a young girl who was really lazy and would be happy sitting at home for the day searching through the Internet. One day this girl really wanted a snack, a healthy snack so she went to her fridge to get an apple, which unfortunately she didn't have. The girl decided to get into her car and drive to the nearest grocery store. While driving she got caught up into some traffic, she had two choices now. She could wait along with all the rest of the cars or turn around and go to the other grocery store on the other end of town.

The girl decided to turn around and drive to the other grocery store. Once there she reached the apples, but noticed there was only one left on the shelf. She quickly reached the apple picking it up, only to discover a man standing there wanting the same apple. The girl decided to have a kind heart and gave the man the apple, which lead to her getting his number and a few years down the road they were married with kids.

Now what would have happened if the girl hadn't gotten in her car and drove to the store, what would have happened if she waited in the traffic and went to the other grocery store or if she had taken the apple for herself and walked off. She probably would have never met her husband and who knows what her life would be like. One action can change our whole life.

I kept thinking about this story, about his whole lecture. I'm scared because I thought about the mistake I had made with Santana, I couldn't stop thinking how stupid I was for believing Tina. My professor said that one mistake or action could make or break anything, and I couldn't stop thinking about the breaking part. From this mistake I could have broken my whole relationship with Santana, and that thought was tearing me apart.

I hadn't talked to Santana since the fight which happened to be five days ago, I'm letting her have her space and time to think but truthfully the time away from her was tearing me apart. I hate that I don't know what's going through her head, I hate that I don't know what's going to happy to us. I just want to be with her, I want to hold her in my arms and tell her I love her everyday. I miss her so much and I feel like I'm crumbling apart without her.

All I do is lie on my bed waiting to see if she'll call, drowning in my misery. I haven't even wanted to go see the ducks since Santana told me she needed time. I don't want to lose Santana, she means too much to me. I slowly feel the tears running down my cheeks and rolling down onto the pillows. I heard the door open and close but I didn't bother to look up.

"Britt, you have to get up. You can't just lie there for the rest of your life," I heard Rachel's voice but I still made no effort to move.

"No," I said.

"Still haven't heard from her?" Rachel asked.

"No," I felt like a sad panda. Every time I thought about anything it always led back to Santana.

"Just give her some more time, I'm sure she'll come around."

"More time? It's been five days! I can't take it anymore, I can't stop thinking about her and thinking about how badly I messed up!" I felt the tears coming out of my eyes. I hated that I was just stuck out in the cold.

"Well then why don't you do something about it?" Rachel said, I lifted my head up.

"Like what?" I ask.

"I don't know, something special, sweet, romantic, something that will win her heart again," Rachel may have a point there; I was accomplishing nothing by lying on my bed, sulking all day.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," I sighed.

"I'm always right," I roll my eyes, now that Rachel knows she's right she's going to be talking about it for god knows how long. "So, what are some things that Santana's interested in?"

"She likes cars and the color blue... oh and she totally loves Panda's," I smile.

"Panda's? I would have thought she'd go for something more like Wolfs or Tigers," Rachel stated.

"No she's sweet and cuddly, just like Panda's," I said.

"Whatever you say Britt," Rachel said as she grabbed her books and headed out the door leaving me to think of a grand romantic gesture that would win over Santana's heart again.

The thing is I'm terrible at thinking up ideas, I could never do it back in high school and I still can't do it now. I remember this one time I had to come up with an idea how to get people informed about the waste that was around us and everything that's going on in the world. I thought for hours as I searched the Internet and ran so many ideas through my head, but they were all really bad.

I went to my teacher and told him I was having a hard time thinking up an idea so he told me I could write a paper on it and explain the effect of waste on our world, but I'm not good with words either. I didn't do well on that project at all, in fact I think I just passed. I felt like this would be the same thing, I knew Santana and I knew what she liked but putting two things together was very hard for me. I decided I would text Rachel and ask her for her opinion.

After texting Rachel I got a little idea in my head that had turned into a bigger idea, I really hope that she will like it, I hope she can forgive me for being so stupid. Rachel also told me that she was taking me out tonight with Mike and Jack, two guys she met in her class. She told me she wasn't going to let me sit on my but this evening so I guess I really had no choice.

The club wasn't as packed as I thought it would be, I mean it was pretty full but it wasn't to the point where everyone was just rubbing up against each other, which I didn't mind. I could dance better this way that is, if I felt like dancing at all tonight, I hadn't felt like doing anything the past few days. Maybe I just needed some alcohol inside me and then I would be ready to have a good night.

Rachel introduced me to Jack and Mike who were pretty cool people. I leant that I knew Mike, he was actually in one of my dance classes. I hadn't really had time to talk to people in that class because after that ne ended I had another dance class and I didn't want to be late for it. Mike, Jack and I were having some beer at a table while Rachel was in the bathroom, she always needed to use the bathroom.

"So Brittany how are you're dance classes going?" Mike asked me.

"They're great, I'm learning a lot and I just always feel so free when dancing," I tell him, he's just smiling along because I think he agrees with me.

"Yeah that is true, are you preparing for the Christmas show that's coming up? I was thinking of doing something from the nutcracker but I don't have a partner," Mike said.

"Oh yeah but I don't know what I'm doing yet but the nutcracker sounds cool, good luck finding a partner," I said to him but realized he was looking at me with his eye brow raised like I was supposed to understand something.

"I was actually hoping that you would be my partner. I've seen you dance, you're amazing," Mike said which really made me feel good. Dancing was my passion and I was always happy to hear when people liked it.

"Oh, yeah sure. Sounds like fun," Mike was a pretty good dancer. I think we could really get the crowd cheering and he seemed like a pretty nice guy.

"So if you're so amazing why don't you demonstrate a little," Jack said pointing to the dance floor.

"I don't know if I'm really in the mood to dance right now," I told me.

"You should! I think it'll be good for you," I hear from behind me so I turn around to see Rachel has come back from the bathroom, I roll my eyes because I don't want to.

"Maybe later," I say again.

"Maybe we should get more shots into and then you'll give us a show," Josh winked.

"Maybe," I said.

Josh went up to the bar and ordered us eight shots, two for each of us. After the first shot I felt the burning run down my throat. I always hated taking shots but I did them because I thought they were fun. The second one went down more smoothly, I guess because my throat my still all tingly from the first one I didn't feel it that badly. I could feel the alcohol taking it's effect because I began to get a little tipsy and all of a sudden I could feel the music move within me and I started to feel really hot. I know I'm a stripper drunk so I try not to get as drunk as I used to get in high school. I don't want to put on a show for anyone.

"I'll dance, but Mikey has to come with me!" I giggle out. Rachel claps her hands together and shoos the both of us out onto the dance floor.

We start dancing together but it is safe dancing, I don't want this to lead anywhere because of the fact we're going to be working together on the Christmas dance and especially because I still have things to work out with Santana. I must say he is an excellent dancer.

After a while Mike went to get a drink and left me dancing on the floor, I was having too much fun to stop now and besides I felt like I had finally got everything off my mind for the night. I knew my problems were probably going to be back tomorrow so for now I just decided to let loose and have some fun. I could see Rachel and Jack whispering in each others ear and if I didn't know any better I'd say they were going to have a thing. Or maybe it was because they were just really drunk.

I turn around and continued dancing and when I turned around Rachel and Jack were gone, they were probably off making out somewhere so I decided not to think about it too much. I also noticed how much more packed the club had gotten, now there were sweaty bodies everywhere and feeling a little thirst I decided it would be smart to get some water. I was already feeling dizzy, so I headed over to the bar.

As I waited for the water I had asked for, I saw someone out of the corner of my eye sit down on the stool next to me. I tried to ignore him and go back to wait for my water but I felt the guy staring at me. I started to get uncomfortable because this guy kept staring at me. I looked around hoping I could find Rachel or one of the guys to help me out but none of them were in sight.

"Hey there pretty lady," the guy said next to me, I rolled my eyes and just ignored him.

"Why are you all alone on this fine night?" The guy said again and I continued to ignore him.

"Are you deaf woman! I'm talking to you," The guys said as he grabbed my arm and yanked on it so I would turn and look at him. I tried to pull my arm away but he was holding onto it too tightly and it was hurting me. He was clearly really drunk.

"Let go please, I'm not interested," I said.

"Of course you are, who wouldn't want this," He pointed to himself giving me a sick feeling just thinking about him.

"No thanks, please leave me alone," I say and this time I try and get up and leave but he gets up and hold me against the bar not letting me go.

"Come on babe, just one kiss," he said moving in to kiss my face, I tried to push him away but he was really strong, I struggled some more cause him to slam my back harder against the bar. I cringed in pain and felt tears in my eyes.

"No stop!" This guy wouldn't give up. That's when I suddenly felt his weight being left off of me and I sighed with relief. I felt the tears roll down my face.

"She said she's not interested buddy, so leave her the fuck alone!" Came a strong voice, I couldn't see the face because my tears were blinding me and I was still really dizzy from all the drinks I've had tonight.

"Aw come on, don't be like that lady," I managed to see the outline of the figure slap the man hard causing him to cringe with pain. "Crazy bitch!" He yelled and just like that he was gone.

I grabbed onto the side of the bar trying to steady myself but my vision was blurred and my back hurt my hell. I felt the tears slowly roll off my cheeks and I still didn't know where anyone was, I was all alone. I tried to take a step off the bar but quickly felt myself falling onto to be caught in someone's arms.

"Brittany, are you okay? Did he hurt you? Can you talk to me?" That sounded like Santana but I wasn't sure.

"San...tana?" I asked very unsure. It was probably my mind playing tricks on me because why would she be here helping me out, she was supposed to be thinking. I couldn't see her face, I just saw a blurred up figure standing in front of me.

"Britt, you're really drunk aren't you." The voice asked.

"Who, who a-are you," I slurred out, I still didn't think Santana was helping me.

"Yeah, it's me Britt. You really are super drunk aren't you. Why'd you drink this much?" The girl asked.

"Because I'm sad," I responded. I didn't say more then that, I didn't believe it was Santana, but suddenly I felt her holding me closer to her and I recognized her smell. It was Santana, she was here, holding me even though she was mad at me and I felt safe.

"Britt," she said softly, although I didn't know if it was because she was still mad at me or that she was concerned.

"I needta go," I tried to say, I needed to find Rachel and go home with her. I was too sad to face Santana.

"You can't go anywhere in this state," she said to me, but I shook my head and started to walk further away from her. I then felt a pain in my back from where I had been smashed against the bar, I held onto my back and started to fall again. I felt strong arms wrap against me again keeping me up.

"Britt, sit down, please, you're hurt," I felt more tears rolling down my face. I'm not supposed to be the sad drunk, I was never the sad drunk but now I'm hurting and Santana's here and I don't know what to do anymore. "Please don't cry," she said softly as she wiped away the tears from my eyes.

I let Santana get water for me, she told me to drink it even though I really didn't feel like drinking it. But she made me, and because I know she was looking out for me I did. It made me feel a little better but I still felt everything moving at a fast pace. Then I heard a familiar voice behind me.

"Britt! Oh my god thank god I found you! We've been so worri... Santana?" That was Rachel I knew that.

"Rach, hey. I found her at the bar trying to get away from some guy not to long ago, but she hurt her back," Santana's tone sounded too soft, I missed that.

"Is she okay?" Rachel asked.

"She should be, she's just had lots to drink," Santana told her.

"I'll take her home, come on Britt," I didn't want to leave Santana but she was mad at me, she was so mad at me, I looked down feeling bad. Bad for everything I've done.

"Take care of her okay," I heard Santana whisper, I didn't her Rachel so I just suppose she nodded.

The next thing I remember from that night was waking up right now with a massive head ach. I wished I didn't drink that much because my head feels like it just got hit by a bus.

**Hope everyone has a good Christmas! I probably won't be able to update till the second week of January due to traveling and stuff. Hope you all liked this chapter, let me know what you think. Did you like it? Also make sure to check out my other fan fic Growing Up. **


	18. He Brings Me Closer To You

It had officially been one day since I had last seen Santana at the club. I didn't think she would have cared but she did and that means I can still win her back if I try extra hard so I've decided that today I will put my plan into action. Rachel said she would help me out with the little things, I was glad I had her. I don't think I would be able to put all this together if she wasn't going to help me.

I made my way to Santana's door knocking on it waiting there very anxiously. My hands started to sweat and I could feel my heart rate picking up. My mind was racing into a whole bunch of thoughts, bad thoughts. If Santana wouldn't like it, if after all this she wouldn't even give me another chance, if she couldn't stand to look at me anymore. What if she saw how pathetic I actually am after the club and decided she wants nothing to do with me anymore. I was starting to panic, everything was running though my head. I turned away from the door trying to recollect my thoughts.

"Brittany?" I heard from behind me. I spun around and saw Santana standing there staring at me. I was right, this was a bad idea. I was so collected in my thoughts I didn't even hear the door open.

"Hi," I said weakly.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was calm but I could tell she didn't really want to talk to me at the moment and that caused my heart to cringe in pain.

"I...," She was looking at me with question. I had to be a big girl and give this a try. "I wanted to talk you somewhere, please, if you'll let me. Please come with me, I need to show you something," I said, I could feel the water start to build in my eyes but I held them back.

"I don't know, I was...," she had to come with me, I need her.

"Please. Please just come and if you don't like it then you can leave and you don't have to talk to me anymore and I'll leave you alone, just please come. Please just give me a chance," I couldn't loose her.

"Ok," she said quietly.

"Thanks," I say.

I felt my whole body just sigh in relief. At least I would get a chance, now I just had to make that chance count. I loved Santana, more then anything in the world and I couldn't loose her. Spending a week away from her was hard enough, I couldn't do that forever. I smiled in relief and thank god she smiled back at me. I felt my heart do a flip just from seeing her smile, I loved making her smile, she had such a pretty face and when I make her smile that's the best feeling in the world.

We started walking together, this felt like the first time we had talked after I decided to give her a chance when she hit me with the paint ball gun, expect this time she was pissed at me. We walked in silence for most of the trip until I grew frustrated by it. We were Santana and Brittany, there shouldn't be awkward moments between us. We should always be able to talk about everything, that's how it's supposed to be.

"Thanks, for talking care of me the other night," I said in a smaller voice then I had hopped.

"It was no problem, are you feeling better?" She asked me.

"Yeah, a lot thanks," I tell her.

"That's good," This conversation really wasn't going anywhere so I stopped talking all together. I didn't want to force anything, and if Santana didn't feel like talking to me then I'd just have to live with that even if it killed me inside.

As we got closer to the place I was talking her I noticed a change in her expression. She was reading the words on the place and then she looked at me with curiosity. I couldn't tell if she liked the idea or just thought it was stupid. I really hoped she was going to like it, I was shaking inside.

"You're talking me to the zoo?" She asked.

"Is that ok?" I asked quietly, I felt like if I spoke to loudly something would go wrong and she would leave.

"Yeah," She said and just continued to walk forward.

Once inside the zoo a lady approached us. I hoped she was the person we were supposed to be meeting because I don't know what I would do if she was to hit on Santana or something. Do I still get to call Santana my girlfriend and tell the lady to back off? I was so confused in our situation.

"Hi there, you must be Brittany Pierce," the woman said to me. I released my breath I didn't know I was holding and nodded with relief.

"Are you Alex?" I asked her.

"Sure am, and I suppose you are Santana?" Santana nodded still unsure at what was going on. I hopped she liked my surprise, I think I would cry if she didn't. "Well thanks for joining us today and I hope you enjoy everything that Brittany planned." Santana turned to me a smiled which caused me to light up with joy.

"Follow me please," Alex said as we followed her through out the Zoo. Santana and I stayed a little behind her, it felt good that Santana would rather walk with me then the lady in front of us.

"What did you plan Britt?" Britt, she called me Britt again.

"You'll have to wait and see," I said, she just shook her head and looked forward again, but I knew she didn't shake her head cause she was mad at me because I saw the little smile that creeped up on her face when she turned away from me.

"Now I have to warn you that these are only babies so you need to be carful with me, they're used to people but sometimes they can still be a little scared of you at first," Santana suddenly realized where we were and her eye light up with joy and she turned to me with the biggest smile on her face.

"I'm gonna hold a Panda?" I nodded and before I knew what was happening, Santana's arms were wrapped around me hugging me tightly. Everything felt right again but I knew I was still walking on eggshells so I had to still earn her trust and make sure this whole day was perfect. "Britt this is so amazing," she was starting to get tears in her eyes. Happy tears.

"You like it?" I asked still a little unsure.

"I love it!" Santana said. "Thank you, thank you so much!" she squealed. I had never heard her squeal before but it was so cute.

We followed the lady into the room where a baby Panda was waiting for us patiently. It looked so cute sitting there, it's little eyes were staring back at us and it looked like it was sort of smiling. I looked at Santana and saw the sparkle in her eyes as she looked at it. Her mouth was forming the biggest smile I had ever seen on her. Alex then genially picked up the Panda and gave it to Santana to hold. She was a little nervous at first, I could tell but after she held it for a little big she was a natural.

Seeing them together was the cutest thing I had ever seen. They just looked so cute! I couldn't even contain how happy I was at this moment, just seeing Santana happy while holding the Panda was enough to make me on a happy high forever. I pulled out my phone to take a picture of the two of them. She smiled at me and then looked down to the Panda and started rubbing it's belly, which only made the Panda nuzzle into her.

"What's it's name? Santana asked.

"Willy," Alex said.

"Hey there Willy," Santana said as she continued to rub his belly. Then he started making a noise I didn't know Panda's could make but it was adorable and it made Alex smile.

"That means he likes you," Alex said. How could he not like her, everyone likes Santana, she's just so easy to be around. Alex then turns to me. "Do you want to hold him?"

"No I'm alright thanks," This was Santana's day, which means everything was about her. It had to be perfect, that was the only way she might ever forgive me.

A few minutes later and our time with Willy was up, Alex thanked us for coming and then we went our different ways. Santana was still all smiley from getting to hold him I could tell she really liked it which I hopped was enough to get her to give me another chance, but if it wasn't this day was still not over.

"Um I have some food ready, if you want some?" I said a little unsure again.

"You have more stuff planned?" She asked in surprise, I looked at her scared to answer that question. Maybe it was too much, maybe I should have just stuck to the Panda and that's all. I didn't know if she wanted more or if she already had enough of me.

"You don't have to if you don't want to," I say really hoping she would stay.

"No, I like food. Let's eat," she said.

I lead Santana to the park that was by the Zoo, we walked for a little bit until we reached an area that wasn't filled up with too many people, actually we were the only two people in that area of the park which just made this day a whole lot better. There was a garden of flowers not too far off from us, which was where I was planning to take Santana. I had come across this part of the park when I was walking after I had a bad day. I wanted to clear my head away from everything and that's when I found this place. It was so peaceful and relaxing, I just had to share it with someone.

Once we reached the place Santana's eyes light up once again. There were flowers everywhere and thankfully Rachel had set everything up when I text her that Santana and I were leaving the Zoo.

"It's beautiful," Santana said to me and she made her way to the basket of food.

"Glad you like it," I told her and hand her a sandwich that I had made that morning. It was a ham sandwich, one of her favorites.

"How did you do all of this?" She asked me.

"I have some helpers," I tell her, she just laughs and then shoves the sandwich in her mouth. I take a couple bites to and then stop when I notice she's laughing at something, she's laughing at me. I look at her curiously.

"You have some sauce of your face right there," she says and points to her mouth. I try and whip it off but according to Santana the sauce is still there. "Here let me," she takes a napkin and then whips it off my face. I look away and blush, I don't want her to see but I'm not good at hiding those things so when I look back I notice she's smiling and blushing as well which causes me to blush more.

"Well, well, looks like we got a couple of dykes here eating some lunch. I hope you choke," some random man says as he gets closer towards us. I feel anger rise inside of me but I ignore it and pretend he's not there. Obviously Santana has the same idea because she turns her attention away from the man and back on me.

"Oh what so you're not only dykes but you're deaf too? What horrible people did you come out of," he said still not leaving us alone. "Especially you Blondie, you look like shit." That was the last straw.

"Why don't you go back to your closed minded friends and mind your own damn business," I say as I stand up to face him.

"Feisty, I don't like that, but I do like you," he says to Santana.

"You stay away from her!" I say, he looks at me amused and I swallow hard because he's creeping me out and I just want him to go away.

"Geeze lady calm down, I just want to turn her normal again, at least she'll have a chance unlike you," Santana then stands up in front of me and moves me out of the way.

"Listen here buddy, we are not interested in you so you can kindly back the fuck off, we don't want you here and you have no right to talk to her like that so fuck off!" Santana was fuming with anger, that was hot but I really couldn't do anything about it now because I didn't know where I stood.

"Whatever," the guy scoffed and then left us alone.

"The nerve of that guy," Santana said. "Britt I'm sorry, he just ugh, makes me so mad. I think I just need to calm down a little bit. I'm sorry, I'm gonna need to take off," and that was that. Santana had made her choice. I had asked if I could get another chance and I totally blew it. This was the final strike. She was leaving.

"Yeah ok," I say in a small voice while I look to the ground.

"You okay?" she asks and I can only nod because I think if I were to open my mouth and say something I would break down in tears. I have to learn how to survive without Santana. That's what I'd be doing survive and not living because I can only live when I'm with her. " Britt, I know you're not okay."

I look up at her and then it hits me. My breaking point, I feel the tears start to roll out of my eyes and no matter how hard I try to make them stop they don't because I know this might be the last moment I get to spend with Santana and that was killing me inside.

"I just wanted... I wanted this to b-be perfect. I can't s-stand the thought of you out o-of my life and I-I screwed up so badly. And then he comes a-and messes it up more. I-I'm just s-so s-sorry. And I know I've lost my chance and I-I," I was getting harder and harder for me to talk and I probably looked like a fool to her so I just turned around and started to walk to the flowers, standing there looking at the view.

I stood there for a good minute trying to re collect myself and make my crying go down. Santana had probably left by now, she probably realized that she could get someone better then me, someone who would actually believe her when they said she didn't cheat on them. Someone worthy of her. I suddenly jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around and was shocked when I saw that hand belonged to Santana.

"Britt, I just said I needed some time. I don't want to break up with you, I love you too much and everything you did today was so perfect, screw the guy. He was an asshole. I love you and everything you do," I started to cry again because I couldn't believe what Santana was telling me. "Please don't cry," Santana says as she whips the tears from my eyes.

"You're my everything Britt and I do forgive you okay. Just remember that," I nod my head and smile at her. She then wraps her arms around me holding me. She feels so warm and full of love and I feel safe again. I nuzzle my face into the crook of her neck and she just holds me, like nothing ever changed.

"I love you too," I whisper into her.

**Hope you all liked the chapter. Tell me your thoughts. **

**All so if you want follow me on tumblr: somewhere-in-the-woods **


	19. A Walk in the Park

**Santana's Point of View **

I woke up this morning with the biggest smile on my face. I haven't had a good sleep like I had just done in a long time. Since Brittany and I had stopped talking actually, but here we were, lying together, happier then ever. I was so happy just lying here in bed with her. My head resting on her soft smooth skin, everything about her was just so perfect. I love everything about this girl.

I lie here just enjoying the moments that we share together. My hand is wrapped around her stomach so I gently stroke her taking in her warm skin. I run my fingers up and down her stomach trying not to wake her up. Last night was absolutely perfect, I can still here her calling my name. Make up sex is always my favorite. Everything is so passionate and wonderful, I feel like I'm on cloud nine right now.

_Flashback _

She kisses me passionately as I moan against her lips, my hands then shoot down to her hips causing my mind to go completely blank from any thought that I've ever had. The only think I think about is how good her body feels pressed up against mine. Her tongue goes into my mouth and it's the best feeling in the world. I'm completely turned on so my hips buck forward, spreading heat though every part of my body.

I want her so badly right now, and I know she wants the same because I feel her body push up against mine begging for my touch. I pull her closer to me, kissing her with everything I have. I need her. She's this incredible person that I have such a connection with, the air around us sparks as I run my hands over her body.

Slowly she runs her hands through my hair and sucks on my neck, kissing it, nipping at it, sucking it and I can't help but let out a loud moan. I am so entranced by the way her tongue strokes against mine. I feel the heat that is between us and I know I need her. I don't know when it happened but now she has lifted me up so I'm resting on her hips. I feel the wall behind me as she pushes me up again it, kissing me.

I suck in a shaky breath and my heart is loudly beating heavily against my ribcage as I feel her hands running down my back to my butt and causing me to let out a moan again. All I see is Brittany, everything is just Brittany. I feel myself become lowered onto the bed, quickly I move my way to the top half as she crawl on top of me. I love when she's is power, it turns me on so much.

I reach down to the hem of her jeans, making my way to her button, popping it open. She gets off from on top of me and quickly pulls of her pants, I do the same. I then slip my fingers against the soft skin of her thigh all the way up to her underwear causing her to shutter. I am on top of her now and in control. She kisses me more hungrily causing me to smile into her mouth.

She's so tight and warm around me so I quickly slip my fingers inside her, enjoying the whimpers that come out from her and the moans as I kiss up her neck and jaw and press my forehead against hers, with our eyes meeting. All I hear are her rapid breaths mixing between my lips. She is so sexy.

I can feel her shutter against me as I pump my fingers in and out of her. _Fuck San, _she screams and it's like music to my ears. _Ughhh. _She says. I can tell she's getting close. Her orgasm punches through her as she quivers from underneath me. She then collapses against me and I just hold her. I love holding her. I kiss her again, taking in all of her, she's just so perfect.

_End of Flashbacks _

Now I just feel her lying up against me and I can't help but smile. I kiss her stomach softly, cuddling up against her. I kiss her again up to her chin to her cheek. I feel her move against me and I now she's waking up. I don't mean to wake her up but she's just so cute not to kiss. She looks so beautiful lying here, I want to kiss every inch if her.

"Mornin'," she mumbled against her pillow.

"Morning baby. You sleep good?" She just stairs up at me a nods, she's so cute I can't help but kiss her.

"I love your morning kisses," she says.

"Mmmm, that's good because I'm gonna be kissing you a whole lot," I say as I lean down and kiss her again. I hear her stomach rumble and get out a little laugh. "You hungry baby?"

"Yeah," she says in the chuckle.

"I'll make us some pancakes." She smiles, those pancakes actually sounds quiet good right now because I'm hungry too.

After we eat we both decide to take a walk on campus. It's kind of cold outside seeing how Christmas is just around the corner. I don't mind Christmas but this year it's pretty much going to suck. My mum and dad have decided to go on a vacation without me leaving me all alone at home. I haven't told Brittany about that yet because I don't want her to worry or anything. Besides I'll only be a few minutes from her since we both live in Lima.

Quinn and Puck will be there too, and apparently Rachel because according to Brittany, Rachel came to school with her once I had left. Quinn was going home with Puck because Christmas with her parents wasn't that great, even if she was going to be celebrating Hanukah this year. This between them were going really well, I was happy for them. Brittany told me that Rachel and Quinn were even starting to like each other more.

Apparently they were going to get together sometime over the Christmas holiday to work on this project they were doing together. They had been texting for the past couple of days and actually it was getting really annoying because all I hear in the house it that stupid little ding when Quinn gets a text.

I'm glad my friends are getting on with Brittany but the amount of times a day Quinn and Rachel text it's just so annoying, if Quinn wasn't dating Puck I would think something was going on between her and Rachel. Anyway Christmas won't be that bad I guess seeing that I'll have my friends and greatest girlfriend in the same town as me. She told me she wants me to meet her friends again, I think they're names were Kurt and Blaine. I remember I met them at the reunion once.

Brittany was happy to be going home because she hadn't seen her sister in a while, since after her sisters operation. She was now one hundred percent healthy. I was so happy for her and her family. Everyone in that family deserved to be happy.

I look over at Brittany and see she's distracted by someone coming our way, so I look over to see who it is and my stomach drops, in the bad way. I really don't want to fucking deal with this right now. Stephanie is coming with her minions behind her probably hoping to get a rise out of us.

"Well hello Santana," she says to me with her fake little smile.

"What do you want?" I ask.

"Can't I just say hi to you? Is that a crime?" I didn't like her attitude, I know where she was trying to take this.

"Coming from you, yes it is," I say to her.

"Whatever, I just came to tell you that I'm having a party this weekend and you should come. Cause honestly it's for the entire Theater program and since your part of that you have to come," I scoffed, there was no way in hell I was coming to one of her parties.

"I've got better things to do with my time so no thanks," I said, taking Brittany's hand and about to walk off.

"You have to come. It's mandatory," I snap my head around.

"Says who?" I snap.

"Proff. Anderson. All the singing students have to sing once that night, which means you. So, I'll see you there," she says with a smirky grin while her pathetic little minions giggle behind her.

"I don't know what game your playing but whatever it is, it's not going to work," I say getting all up in her face showing her who's in charge here. If she does one more think I swear I'll go all lima heights.

"Oh but sweetie it's going to work," I was going to say something but then Brittany barged in.

"No ones allowed to call her that but me so lay off," I was kind of turned on by Britts attitude, not going to lie.

"Do you really think Santana will stay with you for long?" Brittany stayed quite. "You pathetic little girl, Santana doesn't stay with one girl. Besides look at you, you're insecure, shy, I heard about your little fight and I'm not surprised Santana was angry at you. You are pathe..." I couldn't take more of her bullshit. She wasn't allowed to talk to Brittany like that. I looked at her broken sad face. It's my fault she's like that in the first place because I had to be such a bitch to her back in high school.

"Shut the fuck up Stephanie! How dare you talk to her like that you piece of shit!" I was about to pounce at her when I felt Brittany's hand reach out to grab my arm.

"Just let it go baby," I heard her soft voice behind me.

"Britt no, she deserves this!" I say trying to break free.

"No, just please calm down," she runs her hand up and down my back, which calms me down a little bit. If I can't attack Stephanie at least I can scare the shit out of her.

"Listen here bitch. You come near Brittany again and I will end you. You stay away from both of us," I say talking Brittany's hand in mine and drag her off.

"See you Friday!" Stephanie calls back at me. I can't believe I have to go to one of her shitty parties just for my stupid grade. Ugh god this is so unfair.

We walk away from her and I turn to look at Brittany, she's been quiet since we ran into Stephanie. I can tell she's deep in thought, the conversation is bothering her. I squeeze her hand but she doesn't notice, she's really stuck in her own world. I don't want her to be sad or worry or anything.

"Britt," I say in a soft voice, she slowly come out of her thought and looks at me. "I'm not going to leave you ok, and you're not pathetic, you're smart and caring and everything that's good in this world," she gives me a weak smile.

"But I am. I'm insecure and..." I cut her off.

"Don't you dare finish that sentence. There is nothing wrong with you, and even sometimes when we have our fights we get by them, we're good together. Don't let her clog up that sweet mind of your ok," I tell her and she nods. "Good."

I reach my hand up to her cheek and stroke her, pulling her into a kiss and then just hold her in my arms. She smells so good and I just love being in her arms.

"You're stuck with me," I tell her.

**So I decided to bring Stephanie back into the story so get ready for some drama, expeshially at the party. Thoughts, ideas? What do you think will happen there? **

**Hope you all liked the chapter and keep reading **


	20. Get This Over With

**Brittany's Point of View**

"What are going packing for the holidays?" Rachel asked me as she neatly folded her shits together and placed them in her suitcase. Her bag was super neat and measured so everything fit in there precisely. As for me, everything was kind of thrown into my bag.

We thought that we wouldn't leave packing to the last minute like we always do. Well like I always do, Rachel managed to convince me this time to get a head start on my packing. Our flight was for Sunday and I was kind of looking forward to go home and see my family again, not to mention Santana would be in Lima too.

"Um I donno, what looks good I guess," I tell her as I shove me clothes into my suitcase. I see my little black dress and I know Santana will go crazy for, if I wear that for her so I guess I have to include that in my packing. I look up and see Rachel giving me a little smirk as I put the dress in my suitcase. "Oh shut it," I tell her.

"I didn't say anything," Rachel said still not wiping that smirk off her face.

"You didn't have to," I tell her as I continue packing.

"So are you and Santana going to her ex's party tonight?" Rachel asks me. I frown a little bit. I didn't want to bring up that conversation because honestly I don't want Santana to go to Stephanie's party. A, because she just wants Santana back and B because I know something big is going to go down, I know Stephanie has a plan to get ride of me and I'm not looking forward to that.

She won't be able to send Santana away, she's going to have to do a lot to get me to leave Santana. No, scratch that, nothing she ever does will be a good enough reason for me to leave Santana. She is mine and I love her way too much. I'm not going to do anything to screw this relationship up. Not again. She means too much to me to lose her.

"Unfortunately," I tell her.

"I was talking to Quinn and she said that if it was cool with you guys, we'll come with. You know, incase Stephanie tries something," I smiled at Rachel.

"Yeah that's a good idea. Thanks," so maybe this night wouldn't end in totally chaos but it still isn't something I'm looking forward to.

"Cool, I'll tell Puck to come with his armor on," what? I wondered why she said that.

"Won't that be rather heavy? Why would he wear that to a party?" I ask very confused.

"I just meant he should come ready for a fight. You know, in case something goes down," Rachel explains to me. I nod understand it but now I just feel stupid again. Like back in high school, which is one thing I don't miss about Lima and I hope nothing like that happens.

"Oh ok," I say.

I went to the party that night with Santana and the rest of our friends. At first when we went inside we didn't see Stephanie or anyone of her friends so I thought that maybe we could avoid them for the night. There was a place where people were singing so I guess that's where Santana had to go sing her song for her course.

To say Santana looked hot was an understatement. Words cannot describe how beautiful and just wow she looks. She was wearing a low cut, red top and a black mini skirt to go with it. She just looked super stunning, I felt my eyes just trail down her body. I know I shouldn't check her out to much but honestly I could care less because she was my girlfriend and I'm allowed to check her out as much as I want.

"Hey, we're going to get a drink quickly, you guys going to be okay?" Quinn asks me. Santana just nods.

"Yeah, we're good for now," Santana tells them.

"All right, see you later," Quinn says as Puck and her head off.

"Alright, I'm going to go up there, sing, get it over with and then we can leave alright," Santana asks me. I was more then happy to go along with that plan.

"Sounds good," I say, leaning in to give her a kiss.

"Well I don't want to be the awkward third wheel so I'm going to go dance around a little bit," Rachel says. Santana and me just chuckle a little bit.

"Alright, have fun Rach," I tell her.

Santana and I go on to have a drink and actually end up having an ok time, with each other. Of course there are a few guys that come onto us but I don't have eyes for anyone else then Santana. She's just the light of my day. Her eyes shine like they're the brightest thing on earth and her smile makes me feel all giddy inside.

"You look really sexy tonight," Santana slurred out into my ear sending shivers down my spin.

"You look pretty good yourself," I say back kissing her on the cheek. "But you know, you are sort of drunk."

"That doesn't matter, I can still tell you that you are absolutely gorgeous," She's making me blush and I can't hold back a smile for how sweet she is.

"You're cute," I say.

"You're cuter, don't deny that," Santana slurs out again, but her comments never fail to make me blush.

"I love you, you know that," I tell her.

"I love you too Britt," she smiles back at me, cupping my cheek with her hands and then gently pulls me in, giving me a soft kiss filled with much love.

"Well isn't this cute," Santana jerks her head away and scowls at the person who just interrupted us.

"What the fuck do you want? It's bad enough you made me come here but now you are interrupting my Britt Britt time, I will fuck you up bitch," Santana snaps at Stephanie.

"I just came to tell you that you're time to go on, it eleven, look forward to hearing you sing," Stephanie says. "Oh and Brittany, I'd watch yourself. This party really, knocks you out," I raise my eyebrows. Was that a threat?

"If anyone is going to be watching themselves to night it's you," Santana said to Stephanie. That's right, my girlfriend knows how to tear shit up... I didn't realize how weird that sounded in my head till now.

"Well then, i'll see you guys around," Stephanie gives Santana a wink before walking off.

"God I hate her," Santana says to me once the girl is gone.

"I know baby, but we'll do the song and then get out of here as soon as you're done ok," I tell her.

"Ok," she tells me.

Just then Quinn and Puck come bouncing back towards us, clearly drunk. I feel like I'm the only sober one here, I mean I'm not totally sober, I've had a few drink but honestly I can still focus properly. I don't want to drink so much today because of anything Stephanie might be planning. I'm going to stay on my game, focusing on everything.

Quinn grabs onto Santana and kisses her on the cheek, Puck comes over to me and hugs me tightly. I remember Puck when he was in high school, he was always all over the place with his alcohol but this time he's actually pretty good. I guess with age he leant to be more responsible.

"Hey guys, how are you doing?" Puck asks.

"We just got a visit from Stephanie," I tell him, he instantly tenses up and stops hugging me.

"What! I could of fucked shit up!" Puck said angrily. I was nice to see how protective Santana's friends were over us, it made me feel good inside. I had never really had that before and now I felt like I was actually a part of something.

"She threatened Brittany, that bitch told her to watch her back!" I could feel the anger radiate off of Santana and I knew a mad Santana and alcohol were not a good mix. I moved my hand to stroke Santana's back hoping she would calm down a little bit.

"Oh no, no one threatens you!" Puck says. "Now I feel like I'm about to go all lima heights!"

"I'm with you on that, let's fuck this girl up!" Santana says as her and Puck and about to leave. Thankfully my reflexes kicked in and I grabbed Santana before she could go anywhere. Quinn did the same so I sighed in relief. Even though I wanted Stephanie to get her ass kicked I was mostly a passive person and I defiantly didn't want Santana to get in trouble for her actions.

"Calm down baby, I'm okay right now," I tell her trying to sooth her.

"But something could happen to you Britt and I need to protect you," Santana says. It makes me smile how much Santana cares for me but I won't let her hurt anyone.

"Nothing's happened to me yet so please calm down. You're drunk and I don't want you to do anything you regret," I tell her.

"Oh I won't regret this, you can count on that," she tells me.

"It's true Britt, she's been wanting to kick her ass since they broke up," Quinn said.

"Well then there's only one thing to do," Santana, Puck and Quinn look at me weirdly wondering what I'll do next. Quickly I pull Santana's face to mine and kiss her hard, running my hands down her back. She moans into my mouth and I know my distraction has worked well. Her moan is so sexy, if we didn't have to stay here and watch out for Stephanie I'd take her right now. I felt heat run down me as our kiss got more intense.

"Well, now I defiantly can't wait to get out of here so we can continue that," Santana said to me with a wink.

"You can count on that," I tell her.

"Alright you love birds, I think you are forgetting about the most important thing right now?" Santana and I look and Quinn with questions. "Rachel's still not back yet."

"She said she was going dancing," I say.

"But that was like an hour ago," I look at the time and Santana was right. Rachel should be back by now or at least check in with us to say she was okay. That worried me a little bit.

"I think we should find her," I tell Santana.

"Yes I agree," Santana says a little drunkly, and here I thought she was starting to sober up a little.

"Can you guys look after San while I try to find her?" I ask Quinn and Puck, as they both nod their head. They're not the best people to ask but at least there more sober then Santana.

"Nooooo, I want to come with you. I gotta keep you safe Britt," Santana says. She's so cute when she's like this.

"Baby you're really drunk, I think you should stay here and drink some water to sober up a little," Santana puts on a frowny face and god, it's so hard to resist that.

"Please Britt, let me come with you," Santana smiles at me.

"I'll go with Britt for protection and you can stay here with Quinn, ok San?" Puck tells her and after a little bit of thinking she finally gives up and nods her head.

"I'll be back soon," I say and I kiss her.

After I get the watch for Santana to drink I am about to leave when I run right into Puck, he seems distracted which is pretty usual because usually I'm the one the always gets detracted. I look at him and notice that he's staring at something with his eyes wide open so look in the same direction he's looking at.

"Oh no," I say. Tina has come to this party.

**Some shits about to go down, duh duh duh. But always tell me what you though, did you like it? I also apologize for the mistakes in this chapter cause its late and im so tired but I was in a good mood so I thought I'd update. **


	21. Hit Me With Your Best Shot

Santana turns around to see what I'm looking at and I can see her expression change suddenly to rage and anger. Everything just had to happen on this night. I could see Santana's fists clench up, knowing that this would end badly. Mixing Stephanie, Santana and now Tina together was just a recipe for disaster and it was about to start.

"Santana don't," I tell her.

"How do you expect me to just sit back and act like nothing has happened. That girl screwed up everything," Santana snapped at me. I know she probably didn't mean to but I was kind of taken back by her attitude.

"Please just don't, not tonight," I tell her.

"But Britt," she starts to say before I cut her off.

"Everything's okay now, can you just please let it go for once," I tell her hoping that I can get through to her.

"I can't just let that go!" Santana said right in my face, I know she's just angry and she's drunk but I can't help but feel a little hurt. I swallow the lump that's in the back of my throat and try to calm myself down. I look away for a second and back to Puck because I should probably be looking for Rachel before she gets into some trouble.

I turn away from Santana and start to walk away when I feel her hand grab my wrist and spin me back around. She's looking at me with sad eyes now and with sincerity. I look at her and before I can register what's happening, she's pulling me into a hug and holds me tightly running her hand up and down my back.

"I'm sorry Britt, my attitude, I'm just, I'm just so mad at her," she tells me pulling away from the hug.

"I know," I tell Santana as I kiss her on the cheek.

"I didn't mean it, I'm just..." I see tears start to roll out from Santana's eyes, she's pretty drunk if she's starting to cry.

"Baby, why don't you sit with Quinn and have some water, while I go with Puck to try to find Rachel," she nods and hopefully has forgotten about Tina for now.

"I'll be right back ok, I love you," I tell her as I kiss her.

"Love you too," she tells me as Quinn helps her sit down on the couch while I leave with Puck. I need to find Rachel quickly, who knows what kind of trouble she's getting into. If it's anything like when she got drunk back at our high school parties then that's not good.

We have one rule and one rule only when we go to parties like this, it's that we prevent each other from having one night stands. I don't want to have sex with just anyone, I want it with someone I love or when I'm in a relationship, I don't want just anyone. Now all I really want is Santana because that's special. Rachel agrees with me, we're only going to be with those who want us. With those who we trust and can count on.

The thing is Rachel pretty much throws herself at anyone when she's drunk, which means my job is so much harder then hers when she's drunk. I look through the crowd to see if I can find Rachel anywhere but so far she's nowhere to be seen. There are so many people here I'm really starting to wonder why Santana's professor asked his class to perform at a house party, but Santana did receive an email from him the following day so here she was now.

I turned back around to see if I could catch a glimpse of Santana but unfortunately I couldn't see her. There were to many people blocking my vision line from her. Puck must have known I was looking for Santana right now and not Rachel because he laughed and shook his head.

"Don't worry, she's fine with Quinn," he tells me.

"I know, I'm just worried about her with Tina though," I tell him, because that was the truth. As much as I hated what Tina did and would love for Santana to beat her up or something I didn't want Santana to get in trouble.

"You really love her don't you," I just nod my head because I love her more then anyone could imagine. She's everything I've always wanted and everything about her makes me melt inside. The way she looks when she gets up in the morning or the way she bits on her lip when she wants to hold in her laugh. How her eyes shine when she's happy which lights up the whole world or how she plays with her hair when she's nervous. Everything about her is the most special thing in the world and I'm so lucky to have her. She light's up my world and I would do anything just so she knows how much I love her, how safe I feel with her. I'll give my world to her.

"You guys are good together, I'm really happy you found each other," Puck said, was he actually having a good heart to heart conversation? I liked this side of Puck, it was sweet.

"Thanks, that means a lot," I tell him.

Santana means so much to me and I know I can't live without her. I will always love her and place a kisses on her forehead when she's stressed or sad and to always overuse the words I love you. I will always hold her hand in mine whenever time allows me too because I know that the simple gesture makes the world stop spinning and it's just her and me living the dream.

"She really loves you too you know, she may be stubborn at time and say things she doesn't mean but that's just who she is. She really cares for you Brittany," hearing those words from Puck make my heart swell up. I'm just so happy I've found someone as great and wonderful and caring as Santana. She's my world.

"I love her too, I would do anything for her," I tell him.

"She picked the right one," he says with a smile. Then he realized something and his smile faces while he goes back into his tough guy attitude. "But enough of that sentimental stuff, we're here to find Rachel right? So lets look," he says and shakes off our last conversation.

Puck and I shove our way through the crowd looking for Rachel, we're in the kitchen of the house and are about to give up looking in this room when something catches my eye. It's a sparkly and then I realize where the sparkles are coming from. It's Rachel's shirt, which is on the one and only Rachel Berry. Thank god I have found her.

I'm not really surprised that I have found her making out with some guy, she's always gets so honry when she's drunk. Who would have thought that Rachel was a honry drunk. I look at Puck and his eyes have practically popped out of his head, I don't think he could have imagined Rachel to just hook up with a random guy.

"Surprised?" I asked him.

"It's just, her, she's like... she's Rachel," Puck says still stunned.

"Just help me get her before she does anything stupid," I tell him and he agrees with me. We walk up to Rachel and Puck quickly pulls them apart. I'm happy he is with me otherwise I don't think I'd be able to get Rachel off the guy.

"Come on Rachel, it's time to go back to the group," Puck tells her.

"But I don't wanna," she slurs out.

"Listen to Puck, Rach. Remember what we talked about before we went to this party?" She holds my gaze as we have a staring contest until she breaks and sighs.

"Fine Brittany," she says to me in a pout.

Puck is about to help Rachel up and walk with her back to the group when she stops us and turns back to the guy. She pushes Puck off of her and kisses the recent guy she was kissing. I roll my eyes because this always happens but yet again Puck is staring at her with an 'what the fuck' face.

"Rachel, we have to go," I say with a little laugh.

"Nooooo," Rachel says to me. I must admit Rachel is a little more annoying when she's drunk then when she's sober but I don't mind it. I've learnt to put up with it, now Santana on the other hand she has a few more problems with her, but I'm glad they've learnt to deal with it and at least become friends... ish.

"Nope, Brittany's right, we have to go," Puck says.

"I don't need to listen to yoouuuuuu Puck," Rachel slurs out, still clinging onto the guy.

"Don't make me lift you up and drag you back to the group," Puck tells her.

"Please you wouldn't do that, I know you and I know," Rachel lets out a shriek because she is caught by surprised when Puck lifts her onto his shoulder and starts walking away from the guy. I can't help but laugh.

"You coming Britt," Puck asks me so I follow him from behind.

"Right behind ya," I tell him.

As we walk back Rachel is struggling telling us she wants to get back to her boy and make out with him more. Puck tries to block out the sound from his ears but Rachel know what he's trying to do and decides to talk right into Pucks ear causing him to groan out of annoyance. I wonder how Santana is doing back with Quinn, I hope she hasn't gotten herself into any trouble, and I hope she is a little more stable.

I continue to walk back with Puck but according to him Rachel has calmed down a little bit and is getting heavy to carry so he puts her down claiming that she can walk by herself. I still don't think Rachel is alright to walk by herself but I don't want her to hurt Puck if he can't carry her anymore. As we put her down I over hear a conversation and become shocked, angry, disturbed and I know Puck feels the same way from his facial expression.

"How did you break into his email?" One girl asked.

"Simple, I went in to ask a question and when he left to go to the bathroom I snuck on his computer and emailed her saying this was part of her grade," they were talking about Santana and that made me angry.

"So she's here now?" The girl asked.

"That's right, now all I have to do is get rid of that little slut she's holding onto and she'll be all mine again," Stephanie said. I felt the rage build up inside me. How could they do such a horrible thing to Santana. I have to get back and tell her we can leave, that they sent the email.

"How are you going to do that?" The girl asked Stephanie.

"I'm not sure yet, but I'll figure something out soon and let you know," that little bitch said. I looked over at Puck and saw he wasn't in front of me anymore, nope, now he was right up in Stephanie's face and I know shit is about to go down.

"What did you just say slut?" I spat out at her.

"Oh Puck, how nice to see you again," Stephanie said in the most sarcastic way possible.

"Listen here now, if you come near Britt or Santana or anyone in our group I will personally fuck you up and I know the same goes for Santana so if you know what's good for you you'll stay away," Puck warned.

"Like I'm scared of you," Stephanie is trying to look tough but deep down I know she's probably really scared.

The next few seconds flew by in a flash, I couldn't even process what was going on, someone had stepped in front of Puck and punched Stephanie causing her to fall to the ground. She was holding her noise, trying to prevent the blood that was coming out of her noise. That was going to bruise in the morning, she'd have a nice black eye. I couldn't hold in my laugh. Then I saw the person behind the punch... Santana.

I was in shock, how did she even get here so fast. How did she know what was going on, I was so confused I didn't even know what to think. I stared at her with bulging eyes trying to figure out what just happened. I looked up and saw Quinn was right behind her holding a drink in her hand looking quite angry.

"You fucking bitch! Don't you dare call Brittany a slut!" How did she know that?

"Fucking hell Santana, don't you see that I'm doing what's best for you, besides I call them like I see them," Stephanie said getting back up and facing Santana trying to take her on. Honestly if I were her, I would just book it right out of here, Santana's scary when she's angry.

That was not a smart thing to say on Stephanie's part because Santana took her hand and slapped the side of Stephanie's face, leaving the red mark of her hand print as a nice reminder to not mess with her. The slap was so big that people turned to look at the sound and the fight that was going on between the two.

Stephanie was about to slap Santana back but quickly Santana ducked causing Stephanie to slap the person that was behind Santana. They turned around and I could see the glair in her eyes. Stephanie had just slapped Tina. The rage in Tina's face was something I had never seen before and this includes all the times Tina has bullied me or had a run down with Santana. This rage went past all that. Her nostrils faired up and her face turned a dark shade of red like the devil was emerging out of her.

Thankful Santana was still on the floor, hiding from Stephanie's slap because before I knew it Tina had leaped over Santana, flying and pouncing on Stephanie knocking her down, pulling chunks of her hair out. I honestly couldn't believe what I was witnessing. Tina and Stephanie were having a showdown right in front of me.

Stephanie grabbed Tina's hair and flipped her over scratching her face with her sharp razor nails. I didn't even know why she had long nails, long nails hurt. But here she was scraping Tina's face off, pulling her hair. Tina shrieked in pain but she didn't stay on the ground for long because Tina flipped Stephanie over and picked her up by the collar momentarily choking Stephanie causing the girl to punch Tina off of her.

I was truly stunned, I couldn't move. My eyes my body, everything was glued to the floor, watching these two girls. I didn't know what to do, everything was happening so fast. I probably looked like a mindless zombie, staring out into space as if I wasn't even here at this moment.

I felt someone tugging on my shirt but I couldn't look, I couldn't move I was completely frozen. Whoever was tugging on me probably thought something was wrong with me or something. I tried to look, I really did but something inside me was preventing me from looking. That was until I felt a pair of lips on my mouth, Santana's lips on my mouth. She completely broke my trance and I happily kissed back, wrapping my arms around her, holding onto her tight.

"That's one way to get my attention," I tell her.

"Good to know," she says with a wink. "But we should really go, I don't want to get caught up in this anymore then I already have." Santana grabbed my hand and started leading me though the crowd with the others following closely behind. I was still really confused on how Santana knew what was going on.

"Santana wait, how did you? I don't understand?" I couldn't think of the right words to get out, I think I still was a little shocked from the scene that look place in front of me not too long ago.

"I'll explain everything later ok," she tells me still while leading me out of the house.

I told Santana that I couldn't come back to her house with her tonight even thought I really wanted to, but I had to take care of Rachel because clearly she was really drunk. But I didn't leave before I got an explanation so now Quinn, Puck and Rachel were waiting for us at the side of a building while Santana explains to me what happened. It's not like I'm mad or anything, I'm just really confused because one second it Puck fighting with Stephanie and a second later Santana comes in punching the girl, which was totally awesome but she just came out of nowhere.

"So want to explain to me what happened?" I ask Santana.

"Well I guess you should thank your friend for that?" Santana tells me smugly which only makes me question her more. "Rachel, she called me and I heard the whole thing?"

"What?!" I asked in shock.

"Drunk people can still function you know," she said.

"I don't get it?" I say.

"Rachel called me," Santana smiles.

"Rachel called you, and you heard the whole thing?" I asked with wide eyes as I was still in shocked. Santana smiled at me and kissed me on the cheek, I guess my confusion was cute to her.

"Yeah baby," she told me.

"And you heard the whole conversation? Even with all the noise and stuff," like what was going on right now.

"I have super hearing," Santana winked at me.

"Well thank you, and by the way, when you kicked Stephanie's ass that was so sexy, you looked so hot," normally I don't swear but this needed a swear word because Santana fighting and winning is honestly the sexiest thing I've ever seen.

"Well good to know for the future," she tells me as she kisses my lips and holds me tight.

**Shit went down! How did you all like the chapter? Did you like that Santana finally punched Stephanie? I think she got what was coming to her. **

**Tell me your thoughts and make sure you read my other story Growing Up... if you want. **


	22. Welcome Home

I woke up in the morning in my own bed. Like in my actual bed, at home, in my nice warm sheets and could smell the sweet sent of pancakes coming from downstairs that my mum just happened to be making. Every time I came home to visit she would make me pancakes because she knew they are my favorite.

It is now officially Christmas break and I couldn't be happier. Unfortunately Santana still had a couple of exams so she wouldn't get home until tonight, but I promised her that I would pick her up and bring her to her house. She didn't want me to pick her up at first, she wanted to just take a taxi but I insisted. No girlfriend of mine would spend money to get home when I could just take her myself.

Already four days had gone past since I last saw Santana and those days were the longest ever. I didn't like spending so much time away from her I miss her like crazy. Her flight came in at around 4 this evening, which was going to be very long hours until I could hold her in my arms again.

Puck and Quinn just arrived yesterday and Rachel arrive two days before that. Everyone was practically here, I couldn't wait for Santana to show up. I convinced her to come and meet my parents, I know they will love her because they can see that I'm way happier when I'm with her and that's something they care about very much. She's caring and funny and everything you could ever want.

Kurt and Blaine said they would pop by to say hi in a couple of days. I'm so excited, I feel like for once everything is falling into place for once. I head downstairs into the kitchen where I see my sister singing in the family room, singing along to some show where the people sing in it, I think it's called _Glee _or something. I really don't know, the only thing I do know is that the people in that show can sing, like really good. My favorite song is when Naya covered _Girl on Fire, _that was super good.

"Hey mum," I say as I kiss her on the cheek.

"Hey, made you some pancakes," she tells me.

"Thanks," I say as I get a plate and put my pancakes on it ready to eat.

"What time are you picking up Santana?" she asks me.

"At around 4," I tell her but she just stairs at me smiling, it's one of those weird smiles too and it's starting to creep me out.

"What?" I ask.

"I'm just really happy for you, that you've found someone to make you so happy, that takes care of you. I can't wait to meet her, you have to tell her that we invite her family over one night for dinner," my mum always likes to make more friends, she doesn't like being in Lima either but my dad's job is here. That's why whoever I make new friends she always wants to meet the parents so she can have more friends too.

"I'll ask her mum," I tell her.

"Keep it down in there! I am watching Glee!" My sister yells from the other room. I can't help but smile, I'm so happy she's healthy again, my mum has kept me updated on her condition and as of last month the doctor said that she was completely recovered. I love her so much, she's just a shining, smiling, happy girl.

I go over into the next room, the one where my sisters is in and jump on the couch. I look at the screen and there seems to be a really intense scene going on between this blonde girl and some Latina with this gorgeous dark brown hair. I will admit that this girl is gorgeous but Santana is the only one for me.

"What's going on in this scene?" I ask her.

"Santana is confessing her love for Brittany, it's so cute. They need to be together!" My sister screams, I can tell she ships them, she ships them hard.

"Didn't you already watch this episode?" I remember hearing something about this same scene not too long ago.

"Yes! I need to have more Brittana!" My sister stresses to me.

I counted down the hours for the rest of the day hoping that the next time I looked at the clock would be the next time to go pick Santana up from the airport. I was growing impatient. I tried to decorate myself by baking cookies and cleaning up my room a little bit. I made my way to our living room and saw that my parents had already picked out the Christmas tree. I was happy, they always like to surprise my sister and I before we came home from school.

Looking at the clock I realized that it was almost four and that means it was almost time to pick up Santana from the airport. I quickly said bye to my family and got in the car to drive to the airport. To say I was excited was an understatement, I literally cannot be away from Santana. She means too much to me.

I waited in front of the gates waiting for her to come out. It was exactly 3:58, just two minutes more before the girl of my dreams would walk out of those doors allowing me to hug and kiss her face. This was going to be the first Christmas that I would be completely happy. I don't have to worry about going back to school and getting slushied or getting called a loser everyday. I get to be with my girlfriend everyday surrounded by people that care about me and that's the best feeling.

I get caught up in my thoughts and notice that Santana has still not come out of the doors. I bunch of people have but not Santana. I look at the time and it says 4:10, maybe she just hasn't gotten her luggage yet or something is keeping her held up. I look back at the time and it's now 4:20. My face slumps down because she's still not here and I'm starting to get worried. She would have called me if she missed her flight.

Suddenly I feel arms wrap around my waist and pull me into a hug. I spin around quickly only to be greeted with the warmest, prettiest face I've ever seen. She stands in front of me with the biggest smile on her face, which makes my heart flutter because I'm the reason for that smile.

"I though you were coming out of that gate, I was getting worried and then I thought that..." she cut off my rambling by kissing me and I instantly get lost in the warmth of her lips. She looks at me and her eyes are glowing, she's the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on. I don't care about anyone around us right now all I see is her.

"Hey," she tells me and I look down and blush. "You're cute when you ramble."

"Did you have a good flight?" I ask as I kiss her cheek, take her bag and we start walking to my car.

"As good as a flight could be, but I'm better now because I'm here with you," she tells me.

"Well aren't you quite the cheese ball, but I love you anyways and I missed you too," I tell her as she kissed me once more making me smile so big.

"I missed you so much," I take her hand with my free one and lead her to my car, helping her load her suitcases in the trunk. She kisses me again before we reach the car. Her lips are the most addicting thing I've ever had, I want to kiss them every minute of the day. They're so soft and the way she kisses me with so much passion and love make me want her even more.

We start driving to Santana's house, she gives me the directions because I never could remember street names or anything. With my free hand I hold onto hers because I've been away from her for a long time and I just need some soft of physical contact with her.

"So my mum wanted to know if your family wanted to have dinner with us some time on the break?" I ask her.

"Oh, I don't think so. They're really busy," her answer is short and cut off and something just doesn't seem right.

"Well we can do lunch or even breakfast. They just want to say hi, you know," I can tell she's hesitating or hiding something from me and she really shouldn't because I'm honestly okay with anything. I just want her to know she can tell me anything and it will be okay.

"They aren't really into meeting new people," Santana says.

"Oh um ok," I really think that they're something more going on though.

We drive for a little bit in silence but it's comfortable silence. I look over to Santana and she's looking out the window in her own thoughts. I know something but I don't want to push her into talking to me, I don't want her to go into that defense mode she has and totally shut me out.

"Do you want me to help you unpack?" I ask.

"No thank, but can I come over after?" she asks.

"Yeah of course," I tell her, she smiles and then goes back to look out the window.

"So what are you and your family doing for Christmas?" I ask her. Christmas is a topic everyone likes to talk about, it's so cheerful and magical.

"Donno yet," her answers were short like she was closed off.

"San, is everything okay?" I ask her. She snaps her head to look at me and I can see the hurt in her eyes.

"No, I'm fine," but her tone told me otherwise.

"Baby you can tell me. You know you're safe with me," she looks like she's thinking something over. Like she's thinking whether to tell me or not.

"My parents called this morning saying they had a last minutes trip for their work and they won't be back till after Christmas," she says looking down. That crushed my heart.

"So you'll be alone?" I ask, no one should be alone on Christmas or for the break for that matter.

"It's not a big deal, I've been alone for the holidays before," that broke my heart. Santana always seems so strong like everything in her life is good but I know for a fact she's hurting. She tried to play things off like it's not a big deal but I knew otherwise.

"Come home with me. You can stay with my family till your parents get back," I say. I don't want her to be alone.

"No, that's okay. I don't want to intrude or anything," she tells me.

"San you're not going to intrude, my parents will love you and as of right now I'm taking you to my house and I'm your only ride so..." I say smiling at her. I know just as much as she does that she doesn't want to be alone but she's just too stubborn to admit it.

"If you're sure," she says.

"I am," I tell her.

"Thanks, for everything Britt. Picking me up and just... thanks," words can't express what I'm feeling right now. "I love you."

"Love you too," I squeeze her hand tighter and I feel her thumb stroke the back of my hand giving my stomach butterflies and smiles inside of it.

I reach my house and notice Santana starts to tense up again, she's nervous, why I really don't know because my family is really chill but I want her to feel comfortable so I help her out of the car and hug her tightly trying to get her to relax. I hold her tight in my arms and kiss her on the cheek.

"They'll love you, know need to worry," I tell her.

"I know I just... I'm still nervous. I mean I wasn't really nice to you in high school," she still feels guilty for what she did back then but she's so much more caring since then.

"Hey, listen to me. You're not the same person as you were than, your smart, kind, loving and you make me so happy. They want someone I'm happy with so stop your worrying, they will love you just like I do," I tell her trying to make her feel better.

"Ok," she says in a small voice.

When we walked into my house I could hear my sister upstairs in her room doing god knows what and my mum and dad were talking in the kitchen. I guess they heard the door shut because the next thing I saw was them coming out form the kitchen in order to greet us. Santana stood there like a frightened puppy, she was the cutest.

"Mum, dad, this is Santana," I tell them as she smiles weakly.

"It's nice to meet you both," she says in a quite voice.

"Oh sweetie you're even prettier in person, come here," my mother says as she pulls in Santana for a hug. I can tell she likes her already, which makes me happy.

"Good to meet you Santana," my dad says as he pulls her into a hug next.

"Mum Santana just found out her parents are on a business trip and she'll be alone for Christmas, so can she stay here?" I ask hoping she can.

"Of course! No one should be alone during the break, Santana just make yourself at home," my mum said.

"Thank you Mrs. Lopez," Santana said.

"No please, call me Amy," my mum told her.

"Well thank you for letting me spend Christmas here," Santana says as I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her into me.

"Yeah thanks mum, we're going to go upstairs now and I'll help her unpack," I say as I take Santana's hand and drag her upstairs with me. I want some alone time with her but I also want her to meet my sister. My sister means the world to me and if she approves Santana then everything will be just perfect.

**Hope you all enjoyed the chapter, tell me what you think. I'm also almost done with this story because I want to focus on Growing Up and maybe start a new one, so they'll probably be only 1 or 2 more chapter of this. **


	23. I'll Love You Forever

**Santana's Point of View**

**So sorry for the many mistakes in the last chapter. I wrote it late at night and didn't edit it... yea just sorry. I donno if this one is any better and I'm sorry that it's the last chapter but I wanna focus on Growing Up and the new one I'm going to write. So enjoy. **

I remember that Christmas, it was the very first Christmas I ever spent with the Pierce's and was defiantly not the last one either. There have been many more Christmas's that followed that one and I was forever grateful for those times. That first Christmas Brittany came up with the idea to spend Christmas Eve with all our friends. Quinn and Puck were together and decided to get everyone a joined gift because that were too broke to get separate gifts and Rachel gave everyone a star to show how everyone was special in her mind. Kurt and Blaine even joined us everything was pretty perfect.

Then I opened Brittany's gift and was in complete shock when I saw it. She had gotten me a silver bracelet with my name engraved on it and a matching one for herself. It was the most beautiful gift I'd ever received, I had never been with someone as caring and thoughtful as her. Christmas with her family the next day was amazing. Everyone was so caring cheerful. I was happy to be there.

My parents came home the day after that and felt really bad that they left me alone on Christmas, that was the last time they ever did that. My family met Britt's and there was an instant connection between them. They couldn't have been happier when meeting Brittany and the rest of her family. Brittany's sister is pretty cool, sure she made sure I was in it for real when she intrigued me about Brittany but she was being a good sister. We're good now, I love her lots.

Then a year went by and I was still dating Brittany, I would date her for as long as she will have me, she means everything to me. When I wake up in the morning she is all I want to see, and when I got to sleep at night I want to fall asleep in her arms, kiss her goodnight. I love the way her eyes sparkle when she see's a Duck or how her laugh is contagious and can instantly make everyone happy.

It's been seven years since the first Christmas we spend together. It's been three years since she's graduated and now she has opened her own dance company and I'd say she is pretty damn successful. We all are. Puck is in finance, which I never would have expected, and Quinn is in law, they just got married last year and of course I was the one of the brides maids, well along with Berry. Those two just stayed friends forever.

Rachel is now on Broadway, making it big. I'm proud of her, we all are, we just went to see the opening show of _The Wizard of Oz, _which she got the lead role in. She was amazing, Brittany's eyes were glowing the whole time, she loved the way the Lion had courage and everything worked out in the end.

I will always love Brittany, which is why I am taking her to a nice dinner tonight and then for a walk where we can see the ducks swimming in the pond and the moonlight shining up above us. Then once she's totally in love with the date I'm going to do the biggest, frightening thing of my life. I am going to propose.

We are sitting at dinner now and Brittany looks more perfect then ever. She's wearing a dark blue dress that hits her in all the right areas and her hair flows down her shoulders effortlessly. She's smiling at me so I take her hand and hold it in mine, stocking her hand with my thumb. She smiles at me and her eyes light up like they're doing a little dance which sends butterflies straight to my stomach. I love that even after all these years she still has this effect on me.

"San, you didn't have to do all this for me," she says smiling at me.

"I did, you deserve it baby. You deserve everything, and I wanted tonight to be special," I say trying to not sound too cheesy but clearly that didn't work and I see her try to hold in her laugh.

"You cute and I love you, but you know you don't need to impress me for anything anymore. I love you no matter what," Brittany tells me. That's something I love about her, some girls want diamonds and all expensive things in life but Brittany is just the opposite. She doesn't care about brand names or anything she just wants happiness.

"I know, but I just wanted to," I say looking down. I was always a horrible liar, Brittany always knows when something is up and right now I want to keep the surprise going. But I'm so nervous and my voice probably sounds really shaky which means she'll be able to see through my act.

"Santana you're acting weird tonight, what's wrong?" and there it is... she knows something is up.

"Nothing, sorry. You're just really pretty tonight, I'm having trouble focusing," I smile at her but she rolls her eyes and laughs.

"Ok, nice try on the excuse but please tell me what's got your mind wondering," she tells me.

"Can we just talk about it later? I want you to just enjoy the date," one thing about Brittany is she knows when to give me space and when to stop asking questions. I want this night to be special and I know that if she keeps talking about it, I might let it slip and I don't want to do that. I'm not going to screw this up.

"Of course," she tells me. "So tell me, did you hear back yet from that Hollywood director yet? Is he going to produce your screenplay?" I had sent my screenplay to him a month back and he told me that he would be in contact with me once he speaks to this director. They were thinking of making it into a movie, which I was ecstatic about.

"Yeah I heard back, and he said yes!" I squealed out, the smile on her face got so big and just being with her, being able to share this news made everything so perfect.

"Oh my god San! I'm so proud of you, you totally deserve it! Baby, you're going to be famous," Brittany tells me.

"I wouldn't go that far but I'm defiantly excited," I tell her.

"We need to celebrate when we get home. I got something extra special planned for you," she tells me seductively, which makes my heart race. But honestly I hope we'll be celebrating something else to.

I paid for the dinner after I told Brittany that this dinner wasn't about my screenplay, this was about something more. Now she was really curious but that's okay, I'll let her keep wondering for a little while longer. I take her hand in mine and we walk on the bridge, standing there looking at the ducks. She's all happy and smiley, it's the cutest thing I've ever seen. The way her blue eyes glisten in the moon light and watch the movement of the water.

The moon reflects off the water, shining brightly so it's not so dark outside. I hold onto Brittany tightly and kiss her on the cheek, she turns and smiles at me and kisses me. She then rests her head on my shoulder as she looks out at the water again. This moment is so perfect, I want it to last forever but I also know that this moment is the right moment. My hear starts beating out of my chest and my hands get all sweaty. I swallow the lump that's in my throat hoping that it will allow me to say something towards her.

"Britt," I croak out. God I'm really nervous. She turns to face me. "I need to tell you something," I'm literally shaking right now. "And I just need to say it." She just nods so I continue.

"From the first moment I saw you, when we were in high school I knew you were attractive and that I wanted you but I was to stubborn and scared to admit it, and I was mean to you and bullied you but then somehow you gave me a chance later on and... and made me fall completely and utterly in love with you. You are so smart and caring, you are the sweetest person ever, always seeing the good in people and that's what makes you so special. I could never imagine my life without you, you are like a part of me and just mean the world to me, so I want to ask you if..." I get down on my knee and pull out the little box with the ring inside it. I take a big gulp and look up at Brittany who's hands are covering her mouth and there are tears in her eyes.

"Britt, will you marry me,?" I ask. My heart is pounding and I'm all shaky still, I take a big gulp waiting for her answer but instead she jumps on me and wraps me in a big hug, kissing me hard on the lips.

"Yes, of course," she says kissing me again. I feel a wave of relief inside me and I'm just so happy. I am going to marry Brittany Pierce.

"San you make me the happiest ever. I love you so much," She says kissing me again.

"I love you too baby, I'll always love you," I hug her and nuzzle my head into her neck. She holds me tight; I love just being with her, she makes me feel safe and alive.

"Is this why you were so nervous at dinner," she asks me.

"Yeah," I say in a small voice. "I didn't want to spoil the surprise and I was nervous."

"Baby of course I would say yes, under any circumstance. It doesn't matter as long as I get to be with you," Brittany says as she helps me up from the ground and holds my hand, coming closer to me and just holds me. Cuddles me.

"I know but I wanted it to be special," I tell her.

"This was so special. Thank you," Brittany says to me and cuddles further into me.

"I can't wait to be your wife," I tell her.

"Me either, but for now you're my sweet and beautiful fiancée," Brittany tells me kissing me on the lips. Those words cause me to smile. I'll never get used to hearing that.

"Say that again," I tell her.

"You are my fiancée," she says with a smile.

**Well that is the end of this story. Thanks for everyone who read it and I hope you enjoyed it. If you liked it, you all can ready my other story I'm working on called Growing up or keep you eye out for the new one and I'm going to start to write a little later. **


End file.
